dazzleme

I hear ya! Actually he is typically pretty awesome about it but here lately the averages have gone WAY down and my libido has stayed the same! Before this little spell he is going through we probably averaged at least 5-6 times a week and thankfully last week it picked back up for a few days! I would prefer to have it once or twice a day

Good question which obviously stirs up a good debate Can cheaters change......we all can change, look at all the people who have had bad habits in their lifetime, ie. smoking, drinking, over-eating, etc. and those are some major lifestyle changes. Emotionally many people have overcome issues and flaws (and I am thinking some major things here) and changed their life and lifestyles so can cheaters change? Absolutely they can because as human beings we all have the ability to change and change for the good, for many people it can be something drastic (as in the death of a loved one, a near death experience, an illness, etc.) and for others it can be a simple growing up and becoming more of an adult (and believe me, I know PLENTY of 30 something year olds who are STILL unable to be adult like). Changing is hard and something that you want to have to do and be willing to do reguardless of the temptation. Like others have said, there are differences between the types of cheaters....I've been cheated on and I know for a fact that this man will never, ever change. He cheated before me and he continues to cheat after me (he is my ex-husband) and he is a liar among many other things. Those type of cheaters/liars will not and cannot ever change. The other's can and do change either by growing up and learning from life or simply wanting to be a better person. As with anything there are varied reasons why people cheat and figuring out why whether it be something in the relationship that is lacking or something else they are searching for in their own personal lives.

I have to admit...I was one of the "absolutely not" kind of gals period. There was NO way ANYTHING was going there...it was wrong, gross and just plain unacceptable almost like if my pussy isn't good enough for you then WTH? LOL... Well, now I can honestly say phobia is over with because DAMN it feel soooooooo damn good! It all was innocent, my BF just trying a finger, etc. and it put me OVER the edge so then I started on my own experimenting while getting myself off and realized HEY, it's PLAYTIME. Yep, it's good...I enjoy it and it definately feels good in a different way. I can relate some to your wife because I was completely against it so give it time and take it sloooooooow and like everyone else said, LOTS of lube if and when that time comes.

Personally I like music and so does my BF...we usually end up putting on a good CD and depending on our mood it can either be a soft, sweet making love kind of music or harder rock where we just are tearing each others clothes off. Our most recent CD which I found to be very very good to have sex to has been Kid Rock, specifically the 2 songs of "So Hott" and "Sugar tonight" which both have a great driving beat and I could really get moving well too I should just make a mixed CD of various music or better yet (thanks to you!) make a playlist on my IPod with some songs. GREAT idea!

thanks guys Obviously I am bored today with nothing much to do because I feel like I've browsed the forums all day long I think I must be needing my guys attention (and it's a guys night tonight! Yikes! Time for some "personal" time I guess). I've been to strip clubs before and enjoyed it, and Howard you are right, I picked up some tips or "moves" from the way some of the dancers moved their bodies. Thanks Pappy for your imput.....years ago I probably would have been the same way about the clubs but honestly, the women are beautiful (in some places...not in the shady clubs) and interesting to watch. I've been to a few places in a mixed group of guys and girls and found it to be exciting and fun and am looking forward to taking my BF who is a very sexual man as well and is completely turned on by the thought of going with me, I don't think he has ever had a girlfriend who was willing to do something quite like that. Anyway, enough of my ramblings....I probably should get some work done around the house but thank you so much for your imput! I'm looking forward to hearing from the women too and am certainly looking forward to being with my guy AFTER the adventure too...I have a feeling it will be a fun night, but then again all of them with him have been fun nights too.

I'm so glad you've been able to find someone to talk about your deeper more private feelings, so happy for you. I don't think there is anything wrong with being attracted to women, I for one appriciate the beauty of a female and love watching porn with women, it doesn't make me "weird" or bi or anything of the sort. I love men, I need men and I adore MY man and have no plans on "switching sides" but it doesn't make me or you any different or weird to be able to appriciate a beautiful woman. Previous to my boyfriend, my ex-husband made me feel weird and wrong about some of my personal fantasy's.....in fact he made me feel like the worlds strangest person because I actually enjoyed...eeeek! Porn! and felt like I was always needing sex (imagine that...a guy being concerned over the fact I like and enjoy sex...ALOT) Finding someone you can share your deepest thoughts and feelings is a true joy and treasure! I love being able to sit with my BF and tell him who I find attractive and who I don't and even joke about "doing them" or whatever without feeling like a freak or weirdo for doing that. I do the same thing with looking at a hot man as well so I just plainly enjoy men AND women in this world...nothing at all wrong with that!

That is toooooooo funny because that was going to be my response There is something about Captain Jack that just makes my tummy do flips and I've always joked that all the Pirate movies are like porn to me and I can watch them over and over and over again. Like you I never really noticed Johnny Depp in that way (yes, he was cute etc.) but seeing Captain Jack....ohhhhhhhhh baby! I've never even noticed the other characters all that much The other one would be Rhett Butler (Clark Gable) which is another "bad boy" with good qualities too. When he says "Frankly Scarlett, I don't give a damn" my thighs start to heat up and he just does it for me. Realistically...my BF does it for me, when we get together it takes everything in my to not just jump him right then and there and when he gives me that smoldering, sexy smile with those eyes...HOLY CRAP I just wanna throw him down and start at his lips and work down to his toes

Amen to that one! It used to take me a long time to actually orgasm but doing the deep breathing...and believe me I had to train myself to do it which is part of the fun but BANG it works! Not only does it work but once you train yourself to do the deep breathing it is easier to orgasm again and again and again Practice makes perfect and what better use of a long cold afternoon than to practice your deep breathing technique! LOL....

See, when I ramble I tend to get lost in the rambling...thanks for asking to clarify! I'm just asking IF anyone has taken their BF, SO, DH etc. to a strip club WITH them....not asking about girl on girl or anything else like that and just what their reaction was and if they enjoyed it etc. I just think it would be a fun thing to do WITH my guy. I've done the 3some thing and it didn't work out (a long time ago) and personally just don't feel it would be something I could personally do with someone I greatly cared and loved BUT something a little more impersonal like going someplace like that with my guy is something that I think is hot and would love to watch his reaction, especially knowing I get to take him home. I'm not interested in girl on girl, I don't mind watching a porno and getting turned on by that but not interested in the actual...I like my man's cock personally Did any of that make sense? Basically through my long winded rambling my question has anyone done that with their SO and if you have did you enjoy it, like it and make for an amazing night?

Oooookay, I don't know if this is an actual question more than just wanting to hear from others. My BF and I have been dating for a while now and EVERYTHING is wonderful, absolutely wonderful. I don't remember the last time I have been this happy Anyway, up until dating this guy my dating experiences have been...well...for lack of a better work they have sucked. My ex-husband seemed to always thrive on making me feel like some sort of "freak" because I liked sex and I finally got the point where I just quit having fun (not that we ever really had much anyway). ANYWAY....so for the first time that I can remember I am with a guy who not only deeply cares for me but also encourages those fantasy's and don't make me feel weird for them. We not only get along outside of the bedroom but the fireworks IN the bedroom are to DIE FOR as well . He has gotten to know me and know me well with things that turn me on and also things that don't do it for me (and of course I know him as well) and we have discussed at length different things that make us tick. I've even gone so far as to share my person "porn stash" with him where I have simply recorded things that help get me off when I'm by myself. Something that I have always wanted to do which I find as a HUGE turn on would be to go to a strip-club with him, watch him get a lapdance and then of course I get to take my turned on BF home with ME and we can rock each others world all night long . I've been to strip-clubs before and while I am not bi I will admit that to me watching a nice looking women with a rockin' bod is fun and a turn on, in face in my porno's the girl on girl things to ME is much hotter than anything else. I like looking at other women and I certainly have my own personal "whats hot and whats not" to me as far as women go. I know there are alot of other women who feel the same way and while I have never had that desire to cross over and actually try out the girl thing it is just something as a fantasy that turnes me on. Anyone else done this and IF you have how was your experience? I don't suffer from bouts of jealousy but I also know my limits and what would cause problems with me and someone I am in a serious relationship with. To me this would be a great fanasy for BOTH of us and of course he is turned on by the idea as well . Besides...watching him get turned on but me actually getting to take the HOTTEST guy home is a plus and huge turn on as well. Like I said, I know my own limits and what would be crossing the line personally for me (ie. a threesome is a no go...I know what that would make me feel like). Geez, now that I have a novel going on I'd be interested to hear if anyone else has done something like this and how it was for you and your SO.

Like with everything else in life you have to proceed with caution and there are up's and down's to internet dating. In MY personal life it was an option I was willing to try out, I knew I was ready to start dating and looking for a serious relationship yet I had none of the other option's available being a single mother to a "high maintence" little girl. Going out to a bar was not the way I intended to meet someone because when I went out I went out with girlfriends to have a good time and we all made a pact with each about not letting each other take a guy home and it was only about fun. Typically going out to various things I always have my daughter with me which makes it hard to actually meet someone so I gave online dating a whirl. I tried yahoo personals and eharmony and liked eharmony better than the yahoo...just personally....because I felt like it was more likeminded with what I was looking for. After being in open communications with various members and not feeling any sparks, I went out on a couple of dates with a couple of guys and talked on the phone with a couple others yet never really felt that "spark" with any of them. Finally I was matched with a guy who has proven to be the best dating experience I've ever had! We have been together for many months now and see no signs of stopping and we are really well matched and I see this as possibly "the one" I have dreamed of my whole life. It worked for me, my guy is wonderful and amazing and I am thankful to have met him, he has added so much to my life and my daughters life and like I said we are very well matched! It works for some and doesn't work for others, my suggestions to anyone who wants to try it out to make sure you proceed with caution as you would in ANY relationship in this day and age, NEVER give out home phone numbers and ALWAYS meet in a well populated place and take your time getting to know each other via emails and phone conversations because you can usually tell alot about someone by talking to them. (and watch for signs of tripping up and not telling the truth). My experience was a good one but it took a while to find that "right one" and follow my gut feelings with others that I didn't feel that certain spark. I made sure to be very cautious because I have a daughter and take my time. Make your rules (ie. don't feel the need to meet that person IN person right away) and make sure you stick to them, that other person should be able to follow those rules if they really want to meet you. Hope that made sense!

Most certainly swallow for me, there is nothing quite like it! I certainly don't mind the taste (actually think it tastes just fine) and to me, spitting just is not sexy He certainly isn't down there between my legs spitting the taste of me out (thankfully!). To each his own I'm sure and every woman has the right to choose if she is going to spit and swallow but for me, I always swallow with a smile on my face and am always more than ready to come back for more.

Wow, what an interesting topic I have stumbled into on a night that I can't seem to fall asleep despite the phone call with the man of my dreams a short while ago I love all the suggestions given by everyone and I think as a woman this is a thread we could all stand to read every once in a while to remind ourselves that we are beautiful in EVERY shape and size. Confidence and the way we carry ourselves makes us beautiful and sexy.....as someone once said, "nothing is more sexy than a woman with confidence in herself" and that is so true! I think sometimes we as women make excuses to NOT be sexy as well, sometimes it is easier to be down on ourselves than it is to actually accept a compliment or agree with someone telling us that we are beautiful and sexy. Learning to accept compliments is hard and until we actually do accept them then we are still dealing with confidence issues. It took me a long time to accept my boyfriend telling me I was beautiful, that I was sexy, etc. but once I started just saying, "ummmm, I know and you are handsome sweetie" then the confidence level went through the roof! Despite whatever size I am (I am not a small, tiny woman and the largest women either....kinda in the middle of it all) I can either be sexy or not be sexy and it is a choice I have to make for myself. It is the same for all of us whether we are a size 2 or a size 22.....we need to learn to feel sexy at any shape or size and learn what works for us to feel sexy and what doesn't. Good luck!

I agree with Howard on what all he said. Once you figure it all out (believe me it took a while as well) it is awesome and a huge turn on to be in control. It isn't really about how fast you go or how hard you are pumping (the best word I can think of right now) its all about the movement. It doesn't require the whole in and out action, simply rotating your hips and movement works just fine and is fun. I love being able to lay across my guys chest and the whole being in control just drives him crazy. I love putting on some sexy music with a good slow beat and grind away to it. For short spurts I like to get up on my feet (kind of like doing squats) and lower myself onto him slowly so he can feel it ALL inside of me, you have to be careful in that position as to NOT hurt him plus it is hard to continue with that postion for extended amounts of time being as you tire easily BUT it is fun to kind make it a little rougher that way too then switch to the slower grinding movements while on my knees. Practice always makes perfect and this is one of our favorite positions and I find it easier to orgasm in this position being as I control the movements. You can also turn around while facing his feet and he gets full view of your back and can hold onto your hips, grab your hair, etc. Again...practice and before you know it you will be riding him like a pro! Good luck!

Such good, good advice! In time your SO might get over those issues or he might not but never pressure and as long as there is pleasure involved whether it is a complete BJ or partial ending in him being inside of you, don't stress it and he won't stress it as well. One more thing, when we first started out and he was having a problem cumming in my mouth and I'd climb on top...right before he would come I would move down and he would then cum in my mouth or if he was on top at that point a simple movement and I was there to taste him....very very sexy IMHO Nothing my guy likes better than to hear me say how great we BOTH taste Just my experience...good luck!