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Strangest Sex Toy


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I know occasionally I'm staying in a hotel or at someone's house, I haven't brought any of my toys, and I really need some relief. I've used some strange objects to satisfy my needs, ranging from a banana, to the smooth metal handle of a hairbrush, to a squiggle-writer pen, to a paintbrush! What is the most random/strange thing you've ever used when you were stranded without your toys?

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I've used a smooth handled spoon, a taper candle, and my vibrating razor handle (I took the razor part off, cuz knowing my luck, I'd slice my hand open and try to explain that!! :P ).

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I know occasionally I'm staying in a hotel or at someone's house, I haven't brought any of my toys, and I really need some relief. I've used some strange objects to satisfy my needs, ranging from a banana, to the smooth metal handle of a hairbrush, to a squiggle-writer pen, to a paintbrush! What is the most random/strange thing you've ever used when you were stranded without your toys?

Hi GND,

Your comment about the pen just reminded me about my first ever sex toy purchase. It was a vibrating ball-point pen that looked very business and discreet. And when you pressed the dome-like rubber cap it started to vibrate. I inserted the batteries and slipped it in my gf's business portfolio knowing she had an early board meeting. Luckily for her, she didn't try it until after the meeting. The rest of the day was then nothing but horny text messages back and forth and some hothothot sex in the evening. The pen itself has not contributed to a single orgasm but let me tell you, that pen has been worth every penny and more!

Regards

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To answer your question Edge, the banana worked great! I used an unpeeled, very green banana (that's when it is its hardest). All you need is a little clitoral stimulation, and you've got yourself a nice big "O"

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And remember, fruit is good for you!!! :lol:

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Um, er, I bought one of those "deep pore cleaners" at my local dollar store. It didn't do anything for my skin but it had a nice lil suction to it, like I thought those "clit suckers" would so i decided to try it. OMMMMGGGGG....I squirted!!! And the "o" was so quick and intense, lawdy, how I love it!!

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no guys yet, so here's my input.

i was a young (horny) teen and was cutting the grass with a high powered hand mower. Well, either the spring air or maybe the vibrations got to me, and i just had to get off right then and there. Fortunately i was in a secluded part of their yard and rested my balls on the handle...my first vibe experience! My rock hard cock shot a good hot load.

Also, while not strange, the hand held shower spray is a nice touch on the balls when accompanied by either my hand, or my wife's mouth.... mmmmmmmm.

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To answer your question Edge, the banana worked great! I used an unpeeled, very green banana (that's when it is its hardest). All you need is a little clitoral stimulation, and you've got yourself a nice big "O"

Thank you Girl. That must have been a sight many guys would love to have seen!

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long, long, long time ago it was a cucumber with a condom!

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Um, er, I bought one of those "deep pore cleaners" at my local dollar store. It didn't do anything for my skin but it had a nice lil suction to it, like I thought those "clit suckers" would so i decided to try it. OMMMMGGGGG....I squirted!!! And the "o" was so quick and intense, lawdy, how I love it!!

I may have to ge me one of those!!!!! ;):lol:

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One of the spur of the moment playthings was inspired when our pedestal fan gave up working. I trashed the top part and the large feet. I cut a piece of plumbing pipe insulation about 15" long. I folded the top over so it made a shape of a head and wrapped completely with electrical tape. Whenever she wants that stuffed feeling she slides on a condom and she's open for business. At the base there is still an attachment plate if I decide to mount to the bed and strap her down while stuffed with it. All the items you've already mentioned have been a staple of our world also. Beer bottles work also, just watch out for vacuum lock.

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hey girl i used cucumbers bananas candles and even used a salami

Now I in the mood for a sandwich thinking about that and I doubt there will be need for a condom mint!

Glenn

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I was one of those teenagers who wanted a toy really bad but was under age, so, I made one (quite literally a woodie :D ) out of a de-barked, sanded smooth and varnished tree branch (don't worry, I washed it several times to be sure no chemicals) I still have it and still love it. The more spur of the moment playthings included the vibrations from an electric air-pump for a camping air matress, my bedpost, and the side of the tub.

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hey girl i used cucumbers bananas candles and even used a salami

Before I had ANY toys I used small cucumbers, carrots, Polish sausages, A hairbrush handle and those longer 10 inch or so sausage/weiners like they have at Costco. I used to use cooking oil back then for lube. Never used Crisco....yet.

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cucumber..zucchini....beer bottle....spice bottle (those spice island kinds) and for a ribbed effect a shucked corn on the cob--why do you think I grow a garden?

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Waaaaaaaaaaay back in the day before I even knew what masturbation was (I saw one of my moms porns and was like hmm, that looks fun!) I used the strap from a purse I had, folded it and used that.

Then there was some baton looking toy I had, I used that also.

Later on I've used a cucumber, the handle to a screw driver.. tried to lotion bottle but... that didn't fit. lol uhhh I think that's it. I was never one for insertion, I've always gotten my kicks from clitoral stimulation when it came to masturbating.

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I once put my cell phone on vibrate, wrapped it in cellophane, and called myself over and over and over... :P I am not even kidding.

You need an electric toothbrush (rechargeable). Saves on minutes on the cellphone bill. Good at fighting plaque too.

Men have it good. Our toys come pre-installed discreetly at the end of our arms. And any house that has a women in it will have at least 5 different types of cream/lotion in the bathroom to experiment with. Skip vaseline. Can't glide smoothly with that stuff.

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One of the spur of the moment playthings was inspired when our pedestal fan gave up working. I trashed the top part and the large feet. I cut a piece of plumbing pipe insulation about 15" long. I folded the top over so it made a shape of a head and wrapped completely with electrical tape. Whenever she wants that stuffed feeling she slides on a condom and she's open for business. At the base there is still an attachment plate if I decide to mount to the bed and strap her down while stuffed with it. All the items you've already mentioned have been a staple of our world also. Beer bottles work also, just watch out for vacuum lock.

Spur of the moment? Sounds like a day's work. I think I saw this project on the DIY Network! I salute your creativity. You should patent this item.

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Candle, vibrating head massager, carrot, smooth-handled silverware, and a couple of times I rigged my stereo up for electrostimulation.

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