How To Convince My Wife To Give More Blowjobs?

[vomfliegen]

I hve a problem with my beloved wifie. She isn`t really giving any blowjobs. And if so, it is either a 69 where I suck her pussy and she is sucking my dick, or she is doing it just very rearly individually. ... she says, she doesn`t really like it. .. However, I LOVE it, especially if she is doing is long and intensively or if she is even swallowing it. ... We are doing it nearly daily because we both love sex.... however I miss something. Can someone help? How can I convince her or make her even hot to suck my dick?? ... I mean she convinced me in sucking even her cunt (because she loves it) ... which I was never doing by a woman before

[Valntyn]

Please see the responses under your "Ask A Sexpert" same-question thread.

[4whatitsworth]

you can't force anyone to like something! Try complementing her and thanking her for the BJ's you now recieve. Letting her know how good she is at giving them and how lucky you are to recieve them, might be the key to success. Remember, some men don't get any BJ's, so be thankful for what she is sharing with you.

I am a very lucky man and have a wife that loves BJ's and you can bet your life I let her know how lucky I am to have her for my wife.

[CarolMarol]

I hve a problem with my beloved wifie. She isn`t really giving any blowjobs. And if so, it is either a 69 where I suck her pussy and she is sucking my dick, or she is doing it just very rearly individually. ... she says, she doesn`t really like it. .. However, I LOVE it, especially if she is doing is long and intensively or if she is even swallowing it. ... We are doing it nearly daily because we both love sex.... however I miss something. Can someone help? How can I convince her or make her even hot to suck my dick?? ... I mean she convinced me in sucking even her cunt (because she loves it) ... which I was never doing by a woman before

Here's my advice -- from a woman who loves to suck her husband's dick...Go somewhere, a restaurant, or somewhere, an airplane, where she can suck your cock in public/private, which is such a total turn-on for a woman....to make your husband's face light up, go slack, sigh and totally succumb to a major cumming with the white cream getting swallowed by the woman who loves him. I.e., your wife, under your desk at the office, under your table at a restaurant, in the restroom on an airplane (actually that's the least appetizing place to give your husband a blow job...) Be creative, ask her when she wants to suck your cock and then also when you can reciprocate!

Where's the emoticon for giving head!???

[hotpants]

Have you tried flavored lubes? They come in ALL kinds of flavors! Perhaps she will be more inclined to lick something that tastes more like candy. Good luck!

[Desires08]

"Give and ye shall recieve my friend". I love giving my hubby head. Just as much as he loves giving me oral sex. Sometimes, we play a little game of who gave who the best orgasm. Kinda like a competition. If that doesn't work,then try something like "catering" to her needs for awhile. IF she still doesn't want to after that, the only thing I can suggest is to enjoy what you do get and perhaps invest in a pocket pussy. I don't know how good they are. Ask Mikayla. She will be able to tell you lots about your options because afterall, she is the sex educator here, and a damned good one at that. Good luck with this!

P.S. You didn't really specify which part exactly she doesn't like about it. Does she gag? If so that could be your problem. Let her suck on the head only for awhile without being "forced" to go down. Also, I don't know what her life is like (busy or not) but maybe she's tired and just needs a little rest. As I said. Talk to Mikayla. You'll be glad you did.

[Jaca]

Hiya,

This is my first post - and one of my fav topics!

Communcation! Tell her about how it makes you feel. Talk to her about the power she has to make you feel that way. Talk about it when you are not having sex eg "last night when you... I thought I'd gone to heaven!" Tell her when she is doing it that she is awesome and making you feel like a million $. Tell her honestly when it has been memorable, or the best she has ever done on you (she'll probably up the ante and try to be even better the next time!).

Trade off. Offer her 10 minutes for your 10 minutes. My DH and I love to have playful bets with 10 oral minutes as standard currency!

Dip it in chocolate! Buy a jar of chocolate spread and cover your cock in chocolate. I have decreed that I am allowed to eat all the chocolate I like, as long as it is served on my husband's body.

Finally, treat her like royalty. Tell her how sexy she looks - be truthful and specific ("Those pants make your ass look hot", "I love the way your breasts look in that top"). A woman who feels sexy, confident and aroused makes a better lover!

Happy Headjobs!

[Desires08]

Jaca -GREAT JOB FOR A FIRST POST IMO! I TOTALLY AGREE WITH THE COMMENT ABOUT TELLING YOUR WIFE SHE LOOKS SEXY. FLATTERY ALWAYS WINS BROWNIE POINTS! (AS LONG AS THE COMPLIMENTS FEEL SINCERE!)

[colletteski]

I despised giving it to my husband until I got on here and read how to actually do it, and now I actually like it, it's fun to see his reaction

[tryp]

My take on the subject is this: Be glad you're getting blow jobs and let the subject drop.

I have read all the above posts and IMHO all I can see are responses that work(ed) for the individual posting the reply. The bottom line is that your wife is an individual person and as such has her own feelings, thoughts, emotions, etc. The bottom line is that if you love her you are already complimenting her and saying nice things to her. If you love her you'll want her to remain her own person. If you try to force her or manipulate her it could have serious reprecussions on both your marriage and your wife.

If there is one thing my wife of 9 years has taught me it's this: a person will only do what they want to do. In 9 years I have recieved 0 blowjobs yet everytime we have sex she receives oral as well as rimjobs and oral attention to her entire body. And yet still nothing. Communication does not work either. When I ask if I she can do it for me (haven't asked in quite while btw) I am told, "I can't". When I ask why she can't she says, "I don't know...I just can't".

So again, be happy you're getting them and leave the situation alone for fear of doing harm to your marriage or your wife or both.

[Amylynn920]

I'm sorry but I disagree. There is no reason, none other than selfishness and ignorance when a person, especially a committed partner says "I can't" and that lame answer is followed by "I don't know". I call bullshit. 9 years and no oral for you? Yet she gets it? In my opinion she's a selfish lover, but if people accept it, that's on them.

Leaving it alone for fear of doing harm? There is harm done. An unsatisfied partner. Lovemaking is a reciprocal process. When you leave it alone it only harm can come from it. Something important to your sexuality is being ignored. Add dissatisfaction, depression, low self esteem and the most harmful of all, infidelity to the mix is nothing but harm.

Forcing is wrong, I agree, but giving a poor excuse of "I don't want to", followed by an "I don't know" answer is terrible. My husband gets oral 98% of the time, I offer, I offer because I love doing that for him, and he loves doing it for me.

[cmwise1]

Where's the emoticon for giving head!???

Here you go!! We need one on here!!

[pappyld04]

If her answer is that she doesn't like it - Why? Perhaps some further discussion may reveal the basis!

[Amylynn920]

I agree with both Tryp and Aiden: they are at different poles of the same point....the 'glue' of the sticky situation is love; when love is involved, people will tolerate imperfection and less than the ideal....we ALL 'settle' for something less than the ideal in a partner...some of us are luckier than others, yes. The question becomes one of motivation to grow and move forward, and how long one is patient for this to happen. The difficulty is, of course, the more patient one is, the more time goes by, and thus the more invested (time, history, love) one is in the relationship. Just walking away from decades of history together is not an easy choice.

I am not suggesting that one become a doormat, decisions about what one will or will not live without for the sake of the greater good are very tough problems. Each person has their limitations of how much they can take, or are willing to take of non-reciprocal sexual (and other) behaviors. The issue presented (that of a partner who will not grow sexually or refuses certain desired behaviors) is less about sexual behaviors than it is about the dynamic of the relationship; things like differentiation, intimacy, self-validation, and willingness to break out of a stuck mindset and emotional gridlock. And yes, movement can begin either in the emotive-relationship sphere, or via the sexual behavior sphere...both are reciprocal of each other (pun intended). Sex is just a relationship vehicle, albeit a very pleasant one.

Once again, this is why I would invite the WOMEN of this forum to consider actually writing a full length article on the issue of sexual fairness to help guys like Tryp (an me)...showing OUR women that there are real women in the world like those here on TT might be a motivator for our women to begin to grow. My thinking is, though, women may feel that it is somehow a betrayal to other women to offer criticism for their sexual 'selfishness' that Aiden speaks of.

I challenge the more active women on this site to cooperate and write a 'group written' article about why a woman should be fully reciprocal and 'take care of her man' that Tryp and I might pass on to our women. Men everywhere will thank you for the effort!

Not sure about a group article but I submitted my thoughts in the Articles Forum. Anyone else that would care to comment, or add to is welcome to reply on the post.

[ToyQueen]

Okay, this is something I have never told anyone, but perhaps it would help someone on the site.

My first husband and I were married for 11 years. He loved getting blow jobs. I was very uncomfortable giving them, and didn't do it very often. I was "grossed out" at the thought of urine coming from the place he wanted me to put my mouth on. I also hated the hair in my mouth, and never even thought of trimming his hair to make it more enjoyable for me. By the same token, I was very uncomfortable receiving oral, and usually refused to allow it. On occasion, if I wasn't thinking about it, I would enjoy both giving and receiving. But it was very rare. I wasn't comfortable with my own sexuality.

My second marriage lasted 5 years. In that time I NEVER gave my husband a blow job. He loved giving me oral, and did most times. I became more comfortable with getting, but not with giving. I could give you lots of excuses, but that is all they would be.

I think that this is a place where comfort in your own sexuality plays a big part. I have learned so much in the last 2 years that I wouldn't hesitate to give a blow job. I know how much it means to a man, and the intimacy is amazing.

I hope this helps someone...

[Trouble]

On 5/23/2008 at 10:10 PM, ToyQueen said:

Okay, this is something I have never told anyone, but perhaps it would help someone on the site.

My first husband and I were married for 11 years. He loved getting blow jobs. I was very uncomfortable giving them, and didn't do it very often. I was "grossed out" at the thought of urine coming from the place he wanted me to put my mouth on. I also hated the hair in my mouth, and never even thought of trimming his hair to make it more enjoyable for me. By the same token, I was very uncomfortable receiving oral, and usually refused to allow it. On occasion, if I wasn't thinking about it, I would enjoy both giving and receiving. But it was very rare. I wasn't comfortable with my own sexuality.

My second marriage lasted 5 years. In that time I NEVER gave my husband a blow job. He loved giving me oral, and did most times. I became more comfortable with getting, but not with giving. I could give you lots of excuses, but that is all they would be.

I think that this is a place where comfort in your own sexuality plays a big part. I have learned so much in the last 2 years that I wouldn't hesitate to give a blow job. I know how much it means to a man, and the intimacy is amazing.

I hope this helps someone...

Wow that is exactly how my wife feels. We have been married for twenty three years and she has not giving me a blow job in six years and she doesn’t like me eating her out anymore. How can I help her with her with her sexuality 

Edited May 8, 2019 by Trouble

[michelleddd]

You can’t make someone like something, I realize it stinks when you have desires your partner doesn’t. Sexual compatibility is very important to me. Edited to add....  each person in a marriage deserves to be happy sexually, if you’re not a serious sit down needs to happen with a plan for things to move towards the middle.  Or therapy to facilitate this.  No oral is a serious dealbreaker for me.  

[Amy D]

I have to say I think it's an acquired taste, no pun intended.  I was very hesitant my first time, but learned to enjoy it, especially since my partner really enjoyed my doing it. 

[Kinkster]

47 minutes ago, Chris&Rusty said:

how about this-see if she want's more oral sex herself? go down on her and get that conversation started!!!

This is the answer!

Just start eating that thing. A lot. Over and over! 

Fuck it, and eat it again! Slurp slurp slurp! 

Then, you can talk about a blow job.

If it doesn’t work, repeat the process!

[Kinkster]

2 hours ago, Chris&Rusty said:

quote me-I don't know a woman that I have gone down on that would tell me she felt moved(moved!) to go down on me-and I may hold a record at over 4 hours with one woman, couldn't get her off and then when she did, boy she went over and over and at one point to tears! Same in high school, it works!!!! Hmmmm...now I need some pussy to eat.....damn......

Years ago, I had a few girlfriends, that it worked instantaneously! You eat me, I'll eat you! Others, not so fast. 

My wife, took a few years. I just kept working at it! Easy to do, I like to eat her pussy! When she did give oral on me a shot, pun intended, she never stopped! 

[Lusty123]

1 hour ago, Chris&Rusty said:

I was the jr high blow job king-I still case a blush at reunions and not but 1 guy knows whats up and he ain't talking! And once it caught on I was set for life! As long as I ate anyone of the chicks no qualms-I was theirs and everyone was happy-sorta. It went on for 4 an a half years.

After school when shit started to settle for everyone in life, there were a disproportionate amount of women who preferred to be with women.......I take no credit for that but it's just a bit strange, and later in life, I did a dancer at a club in Wichita Falls Texas, she thought it was so great, yep-she asked me to do her mother! Well yeah I sure did, and her sister too.  I ended up having to move to Waurika Oklahoma to get some peace and quiet! That chicks mom didn't want to let me get away and I love older women to a fault, but I wasn't but 25, hadn't sewn wild oats yet-literally had not reached in to a bucket and tossed some oats-any excuse would do. 

Never did have to bargain, I'd just do them, and I was always taken care of in return , didn't even talk about it...............

Hot good for u

[dickiea584]

I'm super lucky for this,my wife totally into sucking dick and she finally even allowing me to try deep throat at least once a week to her of cause not the way showed on the porn but at least she is trying and getting better by taking deeper and longer in her mouth.