3DTiger

My first post here but i need somewhere to let out my frustration. My husband and I have been married 16 years and I absolutely love him to death but Im suffering in silence. When we first got married sex was amazing, I was very insecure about my body as a bigger woman and he taught me how to love myself. He opened me up to new experiences and I now love things I said I would never do. Over the years we have slowly declined in the frequency of having sex. I have lost weight, gained weight and yet it never mattered to my husband who has that metabolism people would kill for. Problems began when he started having trouble with ED. He will not go to a doctor for that or anything else. He is the breadwinner of the house and I understand that takes a toll on a person both mentally and physically. I worked until a few months ago - his idea for me to stay home. I do everything here: cook, clean, tend the animals, run our daughter to her work and appointments, split wood, mow the property... heck I even help him when he works on our trucks. The problem is, I am always in the mood but am almost always shot down from my attentions. When hes in the mood (maybe once a month lately) everything is great and hes happy go lucky, the sex is amazing ... when he wants it. Im tired of being told no, Im tired of feeling unattractive. Im tired of him not noticing when I dress nice or do something special for him. Im tired of trying to do everything in my power to get him to notice me in a sexual manner. I asked him if he just wasn't attracted to me a few weeks ago, he said he loves me and is attracted to me, doesn't see himself anywhere else but with me. Hes not cheating, that I know for sure. He watches porn and I dont care other than feeling hurt that he would rather masturbate than have sex with me. Im lost, how do I make him understand?