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Why Is Being Happy & Single So Unbelievable?


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A few weeks ago, one of the older men that work at the place I o, came in, sat down, and was asking some work questions. No big deal, I'm a secretary, I deal with questions all the time, but the one he asked last really threw me:

"So, now that you're single, are you on the hunt for a new man?"

*Blank Stare*

After snapping too, I responded with a laugh, and told him I just got rid of a bunch of crap with my ex, why would I want to have any more of that right now??

He said "oh, come on!".

*laugh again*

Nope, I'm happy being single, spending time with my daughter, doing what I want, when I want, with no one to answer to buy my daughter.

You would've thought I just told him I was really a man.

It was unbelievable to him.


Why is it hard to believe that, yes, there are people out there that are enjoying being single??? I don't feel the need to have a man in my life to feel complete. I had done everything by myself for the last 5 yrs of my marriage anywhere, so why would I want someone to fill a void that wasn't even there?

I don't need a man's money to survive. I'm doing fine on my own. Yes, it's a struggle at times, but we're not homeless, have food in the house, clothes, and pets that are taken care of.

Maybe it was this man's age, the time he grew up in, that the woman needs a man in her life to get by in life.

Wouldn't he be shocked to learn I was voluntarily getting my tubes tied in a couple days? Therefore, lessening my "marketability".

My thinking it is his generation. However, I've heard men AND women my age and younger also having this way of thinking.

This doesn't mean that sometimes I don't wish for a relationship, or to go out on dates, however. I do, and I will, when the time and interest are right.

But why is it so terrible that I want to be a bit selfish for me and my daughter?

What are your thoughts, experiences, and opinions?

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I have experienced similar comments about how can you be happy without some one. I often travel alone and have hiked national parks alone, visited great cities and attended wonderful events alone. I get the question all the time. What it comes down to is if you are happy that is all that matters. No one can make me happy, it is my choice to be happy.

Keep choosing happiness!

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Well, if you come to East Texas, I'll walk in the woods with you. :)

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Thanks for the kindness. I'll keep you offer in mind.

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  • 1 year later...
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I think part of the reason why older guys or just some guys in general find it hard to believe that someone older or a woman of any type could be single and happy is cause of either generation and entertainment.

I live in a small town where most girls I graduated with already have a third kid. My most recent relationship that ended a month ago everyone I knew and found out was overjoyed with the fact that I was in a relationship. I even asked a friend if me being single was a bad thing. She replied yes. I just kind of gave her a look of "seriously?". She's also dating a guy who is very much a tool and another fine example to me why 90% of the male population in my town are not worthy of women period. Every other guy I meet or know save for.... five (maybe) boys and men I've met and know; have cheated on their spouse. If there was a lie detector census done pretty sure most of the males would fail. Don't get me wrong there are plenty of females who have cheated on their significant other but for the most part I hear more of boys and men who have done it. So I'm happy being single where I live and I am okay with it. Happiness is how you define it after all. I have friends and family who care about me. That's all I really feel like needing.

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Be happy with who you are, single, coupled or other. We all seek our own happiness in our own ways. Just because others may not be able to understand your life or lifestyle that doesn't mean you are any more or less happy than anyone else. As long as you are true to yourself your happiness will follow.

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