Members M1972O Posted December 12, 2018 Members Report Share Posted December 12, 2018 Hubby told me, once, long ago, that he was onto BDSM, but had never actually tried it, he just liked the porn. So, because of his upbringing, he seems to feel anything but the standard missionary position is weird/wrong. He wont try anything else and the one time I did get him to try me in top (the only way I orgasm) he couldn't keep it up. HOW DO I TELL HIM HE ISNT BAD? FOR LIKING SOMETHING ELSE? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RC4BLUE Posted December 12, 2018 Members Report Share Posted December 12, 2018 You might want to do some research into kink and how sexual expression of all kinds in natural and normal. One book on kink that might be helpful is Decoding Your Kink. I also suggest Guide To Getting It On. Have an open and honest conversation about your sexual desires and his. Getting past upbringing and or the teaching of some religion/family and schools can be a challenge. Make sure to focus on pleasure. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted December 28, 2018 Report Share Posted December 28, 2018 RC has some great ideas. Unfortunately, some religions, or ways people are raised, make sex seem dirty, wrong, and you are a bad person for enjoying something that's only meant to be for making babies. It's very sad, and a cruel way to be brought up, IMHO. If your hubby likes to read, maybe find some books on different positions, light bondage, or even some sexy stories to read to him. Light bondage can start with something as easy as one of your scarves, or a tie of his. Just a light knot so nobody feels truly trapped, and a safe word that you both know (tell him you like the word BANANA, and that way, if one of you says it, you know to stop what you're doing to the other person). A safe word should be something that is NOT SEXY or sound like an encouragement at all, to get the other person's attention. For most people, if they over-think sex, what they're doing, how they may look, or other thoughts, they can have a hard time orgasming. This is true for men as well as women. You're biggest sex organ is YOUR BRAIN!!! Ideally, you get lost in what your doing and how it feels, that way you can orgasm easier! Getting out of a mindset of years of upbringing can be very challenging, as RC said, but it can be done!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members M1972O Posted December 30, 2018 Author Members Report Share Posted December 30, 2018 Thanks. I cant even get him to have sex with me right now. Its that time of the month. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members guf555 Posted February 13, 2019 Members Report Share Posted February 13, 2019 Try it! firstly it can be somehow strange, but is you relax - you should be satisfied! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Greg Besancon Posted February 13, 2019 Members Report Share Posted February 13, 2019 Go talk to a sex therapist. They exist! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted February 28, 2019 Report Share Posted February 28, 2019 Also, please remember that, in porn, that's not real-life stuff. Yes, you can get some great ideas.......but don't let the adult films create unreasonable or unattainable expectations. It's like reading romance novels, and expecting to be swept away by some rogue pirate with long locks, and a great......scabbard! LOL 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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