Sex After Pregnancy

[clewing]

My children are 25, 27 and 29. When I had them, the doctors gave me strict orders, no sex for six weeks. Back then, I didn't question, just did what they told me--no sex, at least for me. I still gave my husband oral sex.

But I'm wondering what they tell new mothers now. Knowing what I know now, I would have to ask the doctor "Do you mean no penetration for six weeks?" as from what I have learned about childbirth it seems that orgasms would actually help in getting the uterus and pelvic muscles back in shape. And I sure could have used some clitoral orgasms during those six weeks!

So, you younger/newer moms, tell me. Are the doctors still living in the dark ages, or am I off base here?

And let's remember, many of these doctors back then were still telling mothers that formula was better than breast milk. I had totally natural childbirth, father in the delivery room and breast fed all three children, back in the days when that was just starting to be the thing to do.

[citizenk]

My children are 3 and (almost) 2. I was told no penitration for six weeks with my first, no stimulation with my second. Not that it mattered a whole lot with either one. I don't think I would have let hubby get close to me with that thing either way. Lucky for me, he was in the delivery room both times and it took him a while to realize I was a woman and not just a mommy. Of course, I would have given hubby oral had he wanted it or showed interest in sex at all.

Hope that answers your question!!

[Mikayla1]

Well, I had a C-Section, and I was told NO PENETRATION or STIMULATION for 6 weeks, because my uterus incision could tear. I figured that it probably was important in my case, after the C, so I gave my hubby handys and blow jobs. My friend delivered naturally, and she was also told 6 weeks - but after about 4 felt good, so she had sex. NO problems for her.

I think the biggest issue is if you have had an episitomy, then it becomes a risk of tearing your stiches and getting an infection. I also know that the bleeding you have after makes for NO good reason to have sex.

I think the doctors must have a reason for having this "rule" and I usually abide by what my doctor says. SInce this baby will also be a C-section, I will have to wait again....ho hum!

[whiskeywoman]

My children are now 9, 7, 6 and in a week 1, already...

Anyways, when my youngest was born, they said no sex or stimulation for 6 weeks, even though she was a vaginal delivery, there was no time for an episiotimy or anything else, the doctor turned around and there she was.

All 5 of my kids were born vaginally, and all 5 times the docs said, no sex, no stimulation.

they also told me I wasn't allowed to play with anything flammible, nothing explosive or permanent markers ever again even though the guys eyebrows did grow back and the neon pink eventually faded...

Anywho, the general ROT is, no penetration, no stimulation and no anal, you definatly do not want to rip those stitches.

hope this answers your question.

[whittibo]

My kids are almost 14, almost 12 and just turned 8 and I had all of them via c-sections.

I remember no sex or driving for 6 weeks. I didn't do either I don't think. I know with my first, I HAD to drive a week after she was born because my husband had totaled or car 10 days before she was born, and we had to buy a new car. So he drove the rental down to the dealer to buy a car, and I drove the rental back to town to return it. But that was it, I didn't drive after that, I had to have people drive me around in my new car, that I hadn't even driven yet.

My milk dries up at 6 weeks, I KNOW for a fact we had sex prior to 6 weeks because I remember him stimulating my breasts and me freaking out that I was going to leak all my milk out. LOL!

A funny story here, I was selling a trailer years ago, and this family came to look at it, they had two daughters, they looked VERY close in age, but not like twins, so I asked if they were twins and the older one quickly pointed out that SHE was older. I asked the mom what their ages were, there was 10 months difference. I blurted out, "you didn't even wait the 6 weeks" I was a bit embarrassed that I actually said that in front of our husbands and children, but had just had a child and knew I was supposed to wait 6 weeks.

[Tyger]

I had my daughter (via c-section) 4 yrs ago, and they told me 6-8 weeks for healing time. But my OB/GYN had told me before we knew I needed a c-section that we should wait 6 weeks before having intercourse, to allow the female body to fully recoup. I don't know of many mothers (IME) that have actually waited that long, but I would strongly suggest that new mothers listen to their doctor for things like that.

I was told no driving for that time too, but that was with a c-section. So, as far as driving goes, I think so long as you can get up and pee on your own, and have your reflexes, I think they say you can drive. But that I'm not sure about.

[clewing]

Thanks for everyone's openess about this (I love this site). I didn't think about episiotomy stitches when thinkiing about this. I guess there are good reasons for no stimulation.

And whittibo, I had a neighbor who had a baby about the same time I had Laura. Now this was a really strange couple anyway, and we tried very hard to keep our distance, but this was in an apartment complex. I remember the day after she got home from the hospital she was telling me her husband insisted on sex. That made me cringe. I mean a couple weeks after I felt ready, but the day after? But like I said, they were strange folks.

[Blush]

My son will be 19 in a month so it's hard to remember but... I think I was told 6 weeks also. My episiotmy was very sore so I can't imagine we had IC again till that healed. Bj's and hj's not withstanding.

I had a friend who was pregnant again when she went in for her 6 week check up. OMG............ Two babies in the same year.

[learningeveryday]

I had three c-sections, and was told to wait six weeks with the first. The doctor didn't say anything with the other two. I think he figured I knew what to do!!!

As far as intercourse, most of the doctors now say if it is a vaginal delivery to wait until at least two weeks post-partum. It needs to be comfortable. If the stitches have healed and you feel up to it, it's okay. But STOP if it hurts.

C-sections are still six weeks. As far as driving, it depends on how you feel, and what kind of car you drive. You need to wait longer if you have a standard transmission, because you use the abdominal muscles that have been cut when you push in a clutch. If you have an automatic transmission, you can drive when you feel comfortable.

As you can see, I am a nurse, and answer these questions a LOT!!

[citizenk]

C-sections are still six weeks. As far as driving, it depends on how you feel, and what kind of car you drive. You need to wait longer if you have a standard transmission, because you use the abdominal muscles that have been cut when you push in a clutch. If you have an automatic transmission, you can drive when you feel comfortable.

As you can see, I am a nurse, and answer these questions a LOT!!

The driving thing- I was told that after the vag deliveries that it was because your uturus hasn't returned to normal size and if you were in an accident where your stomach hit the wheel, you could bleed out if the EMS' didn't know you just had a baby.???

[learningeveryday]

I don't know about hitting the wheel with your stomach. I do know that the written instructions for the moms who deliver in our hospital say that someone who has had a vaginal delivery can drive when she feels comfortable.

Of course, different doctors may feel differently.

[clewing]

Thank you, learning, for your informative response. Appreciate you taking the time.

[me4now]

i had 2 c-section my children are 2 & 4 my doc said no penatration no stimualtion my second c-section was a little harder on me because i had a lot of scare tissue so i had to extra careful i didnt mind neither did my husband