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:unsure: OK, my husband I are in the 50ish range. We have been married for 30 years, and are very happy, EXCEPT we don't have sex any more. There does not seem to be any certain reason, but we just don't. I have suggested that my husband talk to his doctor, but heis two timid. I am pretty timid myself. I would like to try something to spice up our life. Any ideas.
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Have you spoken to him about the lack of sex, and that you'd like to have sex more often? If so, what did he say? Have you tried to be more "aggressive" and started sex play with him, rather than letting him start?

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On another board I am a member of, we made a challenge. To make moves on our men and see what kind of rewards it reaped for us. For quite a few of us, it was a way to get the spark back. There is one member who's sex life has made a complete turnabout. They have gone from having no sex (pretty much), to everyday for the last, what, two, three months!

The kinds of moves we were talking about is, sexual massages, giving head, initiating sex just for his fulfillment, stuff like that.

Try it. See if it works.

Do like I told a girl today on that forum. When he is sitting there watching tv, you go take a bath, shave and get all soft and smellin good. Heck, diddle yourself a little in the tub to help get yourself turned on!

Then, put on some sexy nightie he hasn't seen you in in a long time. Crawl up on top of him, straddle him and just start makin out with him. Be assertive! But, be a tease, too. That is fun. Kiss him real deep, then pull away so that your lips are just a millimeter from his, and only let them brush occasionally. Softly run your tongue over his lips, then pull away.

When you feel his dick getting hard, rub your crotch on it over his jeans. Reach down and feel it with your hand, and show your anticipation by moaning and kissing him when you feel it.

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I think you really have to find out why the sex has stopped. Was it a mutual thing? Did you go through a rough patch? Is it him who doesn't want it or inititate it anymore? Is he on medications - specifically blood pressure meds, or anti-depressants? Have we discussed the lack of sex in a non-confrontational manner?

Finding out why he doesn't want sex is so important. As an older man, he may be having erectile issues - and if this is so, then he may need medicinal help. If he has lost his libido, he might need medicinal changes or just some counseling.

While I am sure we would love to help you - I believe the first order of business is trying to find out where the sex has gone awry. Try asking him and seeing what he says. The first step to making things better is to understand what is causing the problem.

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