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Wanting To Focus More On Penetration


brandyfan411

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I wanted to start focusing some on penetration. I've been trying to insert my vibe in me but it's too big. As a virgin, it's pretty much sealed in there lol. I was wondering what I could get to help with this. I was thinking of something small and doesn't have a curve to it (something not so long would probably be good too). I want to open myself so I can try using toys for a g-spot orgasm (squirting sounds fun lol). I thought about the Ben Wa balls with the string attached but I dunno if they'd go in.

Vicky

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Are you sure you want to start inserting? It is every gal's right to decide what is right for her and her body - and I am not one to suggest otherwise, but you are a virgin and there are some arguments to 'leaving yourself intact' for miscellaneous reasons.

Also, remember, that using a toy for your 'first time' will not be any less painful than doing it with a 'real' penis. I also want to stress (for those who may be reading and not posting) that this is a huge decision for you. There are pros and cons to doing this and I want to make sure that you are safe and fully aware about what you are planning to do. In the eyes of some (not me) inserting a toy when you are a virgin 'de-virginizes' you - so please take this into account.

For those who are interested, there is an article in the article submission section on Virginity and Toys.

Now, to answer your original question: if you decide to start inserting, smaller is better. I would not go the Ben-Wa ball route, I would go a simple mini-vibe route. SOmething small and smooth. No duals, no texture, something 5 inches or less.

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I believe that using toys for insertion isn't de-virginizing me. I don't believe that this is "real" sex since I don't have a partner. I believe that if "it's" not real then I'm ok. Now if I was asking for REAL sex advice then that would be different. But that won't happen until I get marreid and I don't plan on going there, at least not for a LONG time.

Now, what would my pros and cons be? The biggest ones that is.

This is a issue that I've been wanting to go through with for a LONG time. I've always known that I've wanted to masturbate healthly (sp?) and go into insertion. My mind was made up at about 14 that this would happen when I was legal. Now I just need advice about how to go this route. I will definently read the topic though.

EDIT: I can't find the topic you referred me to. Do you know what the link is?

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Again, it's all a matter of POV to be honest. Whether you wait to have sex with a guy, or have a vibe tear your hymen is up to you. How you view yourself as a virgin is generally open to interperatation. Some people say once the hymen is torn, you're no longer a virgin, some say that once you have sexual intercourse with a man, then you're no longer a virgin. So, I guess it's personal points of view. I don't see a right or wrong answer really. I believe that once you have sexual intercourse with a man then you're no longer a virgin, hymen or no (since hymens can tear during physical activities/exercise, accidents, or whatever).

I looked for that article, but I couldn't find it either...... :o

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Here is a link to the article - might be interesting reading! ;)

Virginity and Values: How 'Virginity' Has Changed

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Thanks for posting the link Mikayla!! I was looking at the Sex Education Tab (couldn't find it if it's suppose to be there), not in the Article Submission Forum. Duhhhhhh............. :rolleyes:

Where a very thick and almost "impenetrable" hymen is rare, it is a good idea to go to your OB/GYN or Family Planning, whether you're going to have sex, or masturbate with an insertable object, just to make sure that you're healthy. It's recommended that women 18 and over get a yearly gynological exam, especially if you have a family history of cysts and/or cancer. This way, you can build your own health history, get some great info, and learn about your body too. Ask the doctor/nurse examining you, if your hymen is intact, and how your uterus is shaped. Learning these things beforehand is always a good idea. Then you will also know what to expect later on, when having sex and having children.

The tearing of the hymen varies from girl to girl. I've known some girls that really didn't feel too much, just a slight tearing feeling, and others that proclaimed that it was the worst pain EVER! Before I had sex, I went to Family Planning (waaaaaaaaaaay back when), got checked, and even though I was an avid bike rider, I was in tact. The pain, for me, was a twinge of tearing, and then it was sore for a few strokes, but disippated quickly.

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I'm going to the OB/GYN soon because my period has been thrown off course. I couldn't tell you why but I know my mother had a hysteretomy (sp?) due to her period problems (similar to mine). I plan on going next month as soon as possible. I planned on asking her then about it (as long as my mother isn't in the room lol). I also hoping that they'll want to lessen my period or alter it in some way. I have a very heavy period and the heaviness usually lasts for four-five days (which is too long).

I believe that if you have sexual intercourse then you aren't a virgin anymore. Honestly, I'd rather have in broken now instead of having someone THRUST and try to break it. I think may be quite thick. I've stuck a finger up there and it seemed pretty closed up if you know what I mean. I've tried putting my vibe in and I think I'll be one of those girls that's going to be in alot of pain. That's why I'd prefer to break it myself as gently as possible.

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Here is a link to the article - might be interesting reading! ;)

Virginity and Values: How 'Virginity' Has Changed

I read this article Mikayla, and it definitely opened up my eyes and made me think alot about the myths and truths to the virgin controversy.

You definitely brought up some really good points, and to me, i consider the intercourse de-virginizing you if you may.

Thanks for sharing!

-Amelia

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I have too read this article. I have known about every myth stated because my parents actually talk to me. My opinion still hasn't changed. I feel that if I'm not having sex with a man (penis in vagina as it was put) then it's ok. I mean, I want it broken for masterbation purposes. I really never thought about using dildos, only vibes (both non and dual action). Honestly, this article did nothing to change my mind (really no offense Mikayla because it was a good article).

So....my same thought still stands. I may discuss this issue with my mother. Am I going to tell her I use a vibe? BLEEP NO!! I'm not freakin' nuts!! But, I can get my answer and not mention my beloved toy. So until I talk to mom, my opinions and thoughts are the same.

Thank you Mikayla for your help. As my "gangsta" brother (I put emphisize on the quotations) would say: Yo, you get mad props on this one. If you need translation (I did), it means that you have my respect and you did a beautiful job.

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Brandyfan:

THe article was not meant to 'change your mind' or anybody elses, it was just an informative article weighing out the pros and cons and possible interpretations to the notion of 'virginity.'

The glory of free thinking is being able to make your own decisions - it is simply my hope and prayer that young people make INFORMED decisions over misinformed ones!

Good Luck!

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I know that Mikayla but that's what I wanted it to do. I wanted it to challenge what I thought, that's just how I am lol. But anyways, read my GREAT post in the member updates section!

Vicky

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