Please Help Me

[whiskeywoman]

Ok, so almost everyone on the board who knows me, knows I have 4 girls, the range from 20 months to 9 years.

Anyways, my 9 yr old is beginning to hit puberty, her breats are beginning to develop and she is beginning to get peach fuzz on her legs, and other places.

We have had the " your body is gonna change soon" talk.

They are beginning to " eplore" themselves, I have caught them more than once standing in the living room touching themselves.

I have asked them not to do that in front of their grandmother and their sisters, if they want to touch themselves like that they need to go into the bedroom.

Well, my eldest is also discovering herself, she has her moments where she sneaks off into the bedroom for an hour or so.

The problem?

The 2 eldest girls 9 and 7, are having their 6 yr old sister rub and touch them on their tootches.

This disturbes the 6 yr old a great deal.

I tell them to stop, but it seems to make them want to do it more.

I will go in to check on them at night, and will find the 2 oldest girls rubbing each other.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against a lil girl on girl action.

I emjoy it once in a while myself.

However, I DO have a problem with my children doing it to each other.

When they are old enough to make their own choices about their sexuality, and if they decide that they want to be with a female, so be it.

I will not be one to stop them.

Anyone have any advice on how to best deal with this?

I am asking because I do not have ANY clue whatsoever on how to deal with this.

I can tell them to stop, but that does not mean they will listen to me.

Any advice y'alls could give me would be much appreciated.

Thanks

[Mikayla1]

I submit to Iha's expertise in this area. However, I will add this:

I remember being maybe 8 and started to enjoy having feelings and touch down there. My little brother used to want to play with me (as in, army guys, dolls, etc.) I remember using his army guys to get him to 'run' over my body, particularly my crotch. It felt better to have anyone BUT me touching myself. We never did this naked, I didn't even know that I was doing this deliberately until my Mom saw one day and simply told me it was, 'inappropriate' and I never did it again (at least not with my brother!).

I think children seek out pleasure - the same way adults do. When I was a little older, a girlfriend and I touched each other a bit. It seemed natural. We never were caught, and never told, but I find it natural.

I think that the most important thing is not to overreact, be honest about what they are doing and why when you talk to them. Tell them when it is appropriate and why. The bigger deal you make of it, the more they will get the high from doing it behind your back. Masturbation and sexual touch is normal in most cases. Just make sure that as Iha suggests, no one is leading them down this path.

[Mikayla1]

LOL....at first I read that and I was confused...then I though, "Duh...got it!" Very funny!

[pappyld04]

As much as ALL of us parents would like to think this couldn't be happening at this age, WE ARE VERY WRONG. This is one of the more touchy subjects here but really is a great one to encounter. This is one of the many that may find a proper way to deal with this! Since I caught that we have a pro here I shall say I LOVE THIS SITE FOR JUST THIS REASON!!!