Newbie RubyGirl Posted February 10, 2008 Newbie Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 I am a 50ish woman. My husband has medical conditions which will not allow him to sustain an erection suitable for intercourse. We have tried everything, and I mean everything. He is very skilled at oral sex, but seems to be losing interest in that as well, as he is substantially older than I and has developed Alzheimers. I have never owned a vibrator or dildo in my life until about 2 years ago, I bought a dildo. Didnt need to. Despite my size, I had no problem all my life with men and having a wonderful sex life. I love it, and am an enthusiastic participant. I'm also lucky enough to be multi-orgasmic. Typically, I have screaming bloody murder type orgasms. Problem is, I am quite large in the middle, and my arms are too short to adequately use the thing. I cant reach down to the critical parts to use one. Is there any thing which I could use for penetration? I have thought I might need to buy a double one, or one with a handle. I dont know what else to do, and I am going nuts. I miss the penetration. Help, anyone. This is a serious post, and not meant for comic relief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thurisas Posted February 10, 2008 Members Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 You've obviously been burned by people quite a bit regarding your weight and I hope you quickly find out that this isn't that sort of site. The people here are genuinely willing and wanting to help you enhance your sex life. That being said, when you say you have issues reaching around to insert does that mean that you can't hold something steady and lower yourself down onto it as well? I ask because there are some toys out there that have a suction cup base, or a wide enough base that you could lower yourself down onto it and ride it. One such toy is the blue corkscrew that is sold here on TooTimid. You can find that with a quick search under the shopping tab. The vibes are good with that toy and it tapers to become thicker at the base and this may be a good fit for you.Thurisas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members froggystyle1977 Posted February 10, 2008 Members Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 Thurisas is right there are many toys that you can attach to surfaces and then ride them. For someone larger the side of the tub or head board, footboard of a bed. May work well. I am sorry I can't offer much for advice I am reletively new to the world of toys myself. good luck finding something perfect!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mikayla1 Posted February 10, 2008 Members Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 I remember when I was pregnant and I was DESPERATELY trying to use a toy when my hubby was out of town - I simply could NOT get my arms down there (I have short arms). I was very frustrated - so I understand your dilemma! I would say you can try the double dildo (easier manipulation), try one you can stick on a bathtub or headboard (lots of those available), or try sitting UP for the insertion, then using your foot to hold it in place (or a pillow or two).Also, you can ask your hubby to help you! He may not be able to sustain an erection, but I am sure he would like to watch you getting pleasured! Ask him to assist you and you may be surprised. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted February 11, 2008 Members Report Share Posted February 11, 2008 This Dual action is virtually hands free.Ultimate Bendable Love Bunny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie RubyGirl Posted February 11, 2008 Author Newbie Report Share Posted February 11, 2008 Thank you, everyone. Yes, you're right, I have been burned too often; as in, OMG, what does someone her size want with sex to begin with? I'm about Carnie Wilsons size pre-WLS surgery. You've given me some excellent suggestions, and I'll look to see what might work best for me. As a novice evaluating and buying these things, there is sure a lot to learn. I dont know how I feel about asking hubby to join in, but I have a feeling he will be willing to participate. He is the one who asked me to buy the dildo in the beginning. He had just started having difficulty with penetration and said maybe I should get one to "open myself up" a bit in order to make penetration easier for him. It didnt work, but I didnt mind the feeling of it. We tried it a few times, didnt work, and then one day he says I dont want you to use that thing. Whether he felt a little threatened by it (it was the Ron Jeremy lookalike model) or why he said that, I dont know; and I did ask. Now I am the one who is going to have to get over my shyness about asking him to join in. Thank you again for the responses and taking my question seriously. I appreciate it very much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bazil323 Posted February 12, 2008 Members Report Share Posted February 12, 2008 There are the options listed above. Also, if you'd like hubby to join, you could get a "enhancer" type toy that fits over his penis so he feels like he's taking part. Or you could get a strap-on for him to wear. Also, if you can reach down to insert the toy, some of the rabbit toys with a remote may work for you. Such as these: Rabbit JackrabbitSuction Cup rabbit Royal Rabbit Or The Dream Boat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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