One Night Stand W/o Investing Any Feelings

[deianeiralove]

I have another question.... how come women from liberated country

can enjoy having one night stand from a total stranger (what i mean is a

guy whom they recently dated and then after their date they'll end up having

satisfying sex without giving or investing enough feelings for that guy...

I'm amazed how do they do that... That is what i want to practice

to be able to have sex with a guy without any strings attached....

Could somebody be satisfied with having sex without sharing any emotions/feelings???

SEXPERTS I really do need your advise....

[Kinky Twinkie]

I agree with Thors nymph. I need to care about a woman a lot to enjoy having sex with her. I need to get to know her, and have her know me before we have sex. The Sex is so much better that way. I tried one night stands when I was younger, and it didn't do it for me.

Howard

Love makes a difference, without it it not very satisfying

Glenn

[deianeiralove]

As a conclusion on what everybody had said it is still essential to set some feelings to someone to achieve having great sex....

I have experienced having one night stand twice and I didn't do any good for me... I guess I needed someone

whom I'm comfortable with to be able to have that satisfying sex...

Thanx guys for enlightening me.....

[Mikayla1]

While I agree that love does play a part in good sex....I will admit (and I am sure I am not THE ONLY woman like this) that I have had fantastic, satisfying sex and I was no where near love!

In my pre-marital days, I did some dating and had a few (2) one night stands. They were fantastic! While I totally agree that you really can't be your 'truest' and most open self with a stranger (often) and that pleasure takes on a whole new perspective when you have love involved, I do think that sex can be great when you are casually involved.

There is, after all, a distinct difference between 'making love' and 'fucking' - and I have enjoyed many a fuck before falling 'in love' and making that transition.

How do you do it? Not everyone can. Some have to have that emotional connection. You will know based on how you feel about it before, during and after your experience. Casual sex is NOT for everyone!

[jesso]

It's just a different sexual mindset.

Yes, sex is better when you love or having feelings for the person you are sleeping with. You connect on a variant sexual plane. But, you can have a sexual partner and not be emotionally involved with them. Frankly, sometimes you are just horny and need to let off some steam. Call it what you like; a one night stand, a friend with benefits, a booty call. I know I'm not the only one on this board that at one time in their life was curious about sleeping with someone based on pure animal instinct. I have had some partners in the past that I would refer to as "booty calls" before I got into the long term relationship I'm currently in. I don't think you can necessarily evaluate a pattern of how it works. I can say from my experience when it did occur it resulted from me trying to start a relationship with someone and knowing it wasn't going to work out. So I detached myself emotionally and decided to just have fun. Just make sure you are being safe with whatever situation you are putting yourself in and with contraception.

[synirr]

All the sex I'm having currently is very casual... not one night stand casual, but all the same, it's nowhere close to love. I find that the first few times I am with a person it's very difficult for me to concentrate on enjoying myself. Yes, it's enjoyable, but unless I am at least friends with them, I just don't feel enough of a connection to actually be able to orgasm. I can have great "friends with benefits" relationships as long as they really are friends and not just benefits... maybe that would be a nice compromise for you?

[Tyger]

Most women find it very difficult to seperate sex and love. It's the way we're wired. It is possible, but you have to really be prepared to stay uninvolved. You fight against the very nature of being a woman when this is done. Some women just can't do it. Liberated or not, sex is different for many people.

I've had 2 FWB's (friends with benefits). One was a friend I've known since I was about 14, so I knew him, loved him as a friend, and was very comfy with him. That lasted about 6 months, which, IMO, was too long to keep engaging in loveless sex.

The other was a month long "booty call". I stopped both when I knew that I was getting close to allowing myself to open up enough to get hurt. I'm happy where I am now, and wouldn't change it, but, every so often, I regret not telling those 2 how I was starting to feel. It was very hard afterwards.

Was it fun? Yes. Was it satisfying? In a way, yes, and in a way, no, not at all. I got my physical needs met, but, at the end of the night, I slept alone, and I was craving a more emotional connection, though I realized that I was too freshly divorced to be ready for a commitment. I didn't sleep with others during this time, but, I did flirt, have fun, and dated, but I never slept with more than one guy at a time either.

Let me echo what was already said: if you're going to engage in ANY sexual activity, whether it be a one-nighter, or a relationship, BE SAFE about it!! Use condoms at all times!!!

Best wishes.

[synirr]

I dunno Tyger, I wouldn't say that's a female thing in general. Personally, I have absolutely NO problem staying uninvolved, but I have been with men who DID. I think it falls to the individual to know themselves and how they will feel about such a situation.

That said, again, I have always been actual FRIENDS with my FWBs and appreciate that relationship for what it is. There is a degree of closeness there, but certainly no butterflies, and at the end of the day I know it simply wouldn't work out as a more serious relationship, so I have no problem keeping those feelings out of it.

[froggystyle1977]

I don't know how the whole liberated country fits in. I am not sure that your views on american ladies

is accurate.

While some poeple (regardless of where they are from) can have meaningless sex. Many can't.

I personally have had two one night stands, one of them was a huge mistake. The other was actually

twice and was all I needed at the time. It was all in my mindset. I would hope I am never in that place

again.

Being yourself and knowing yourself is much more important then being able to have a meaningless

sex life!!

[Kama]

I dunno Tyger, I wouldn't say that's a female thing in general. Personally, I have absolutely NO problem staying uninvolved, but I have been with men who DID.

This has been my problem in the past, which is why I don't do no- strings attached sex anymore. I don't want to deal with the guys getting attached and not being able to let go. There are other reasons why I gave up on casual sex(such as wanting love/emotional connection to go with it), but there are guys that can get clingy and addicted to you too.

My FWB turned into a disaster. I knew how to strictly see the guy as a good friend, but it looks like he wanted more than that. Some casual hook-ups of mine have definitely been PHYSICALLY satisfying/fun, but there was still the feeling of emptiness that lingered on after it was done.