Jump to content
Official Community Forums Home
Header promo block image

Sex Drive After Ejaculation


komana

Recommended Posts

  • Members

My hubby and I have been opening up A LOT this last year about sex, what pleases us, etc. We've discovered that, although he wants to please me as many times as we can stay awake for, he completely loses his drive to do so after his first ejaculation. We can be in the middle of things, and he'll beg me to keep going after he's done and bring him back in the action after a few minutes, but the moment he orgasms, and makes sure I do too, he pretty much falls asleep and asks me not to wake him up. When we talk later, he tells me that he really does want me to wake him back up and continue most of the time (unless it's obvious that he's too tired and needs sleep because of work), no matter what he says. He would like to have more drive after the fact, but doesn't seem to be able to follow through. On the few occasions that I've just said "the heck with it!" and gone to work on him with hands and mouth, he *can* get another erection, but it's not as hard as before, and he doesn't really to get very much out of the sex... at that point it's mostly wham, bam, thank you ma'am, and goes back to sleep. He's usually more miserable the morning after I try, though, because he doesn't feel like he satisfied me the second time. He finally asked me to find out anything I knew on this phenomenon, and I immediately thought of the forum. I told him about it, said I didn't see much after looking through several pages, and he gave me the go-ahead to ask :). A year ago I really don't think he would have. So, for the men, is there something he can do about this? Does it sound like a mental thing or a physical/psychological thing? Does he need to just "suck it up" and keep going? Or should we just delay his orgasm for as long as possible, and just forget about him cumming multiple times in one night? Thanks for any insight you guys can offer!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Some guys are either incapapable or unwilling I have no clue which. I used to be a lot better at this but I must admit that the years and all the bad habits have taken a toll on that at least. Even when I could pull it off all the time the second was never the same as the first and so on. Controlling his O may be more in line here. Another trick I learned along the way. After a while of build-up and back-off the orgasms are pretty intense! I think this is more of a call that he should be able to figure out himself!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members
I am a 'single shot' kinda guy with few exceptions..I have always been the type who could hold out for the long haul and by the time I get to the grand finale I am physically exhausted if we have sex at night.

Time of day makes a huge difference for me, if we are having sex in the morning hrs. I can get just as hard for round two as I am for round one and I don't need nearly the recovery time.

my hubby is the same way...rarely do i get twice in the same night...but sometimes i can get a morning and afternoon round in

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

How old is hubby? If he is young he may have the capability but just needs to learn to control the urge to cum. Are you having multiple Os? Try to have as many Os as you can before he is ready, that way you will feel more satisfied. It's a learning curve for your hubby, the more practice he gets, the better he will get at holding things off so he can pleasure you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

When my Hubby was younger his recovery time was minimal. Now that he's 50 he a once and done kind of guy, but that in no way has to be the end for you. That's when you could bring out the toys.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

He's a year younger than I am, so it's not an age thing, that's for sure! I guess he's pretty wise, in that he really wants me to have multiple O's before we even get started together. We have a problem on the toy front though :( He seems to think that he should be able to give me the best orgasms I've ever had, and since a toy can occasionally do it better, it should just replace him. He's taken a big ego hit over this, and I've tried to be supportive, but it seems to devolve into arguments instead. He doesn't want me to get rid of the toys, or stop using them, but I just feel so bad about it all! And boys claim girls are confusing...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

He's self concious. I thnk his size might also be a factor, my college sweetheart was a BIG guy (my poor va-jingy) and I think that all the effort and blood rush just took it out of him. He always wanted to go again, and on occasions he could go for quite some time but when it was over, the poor guy was out like a light. I did wake him up once for some loving and he gave it to me, but he humped himself sick, the repetitive motion i think did him in. So needless to say I never tried that again. I always had fun though.

As far as toys go, just remind him that while the toys might give you a better physical orgasim, only he can give you the whole package.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use & Privacy Policy