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Some Things That Are Bothering Me.



Hey, this isn't really related to anything on this site but there really isn't anywhere else I feel like I can openly be upset. For awhile now my best friend has been greatly frustrating me but I will explain from the beginning what has happened.

We met a little over two years ago by accident. She was friends with one of the few people I'd gotten close to at my college and after meeting we very quickly became close. We are both very much so into comics, video games, and anime so we had a lot in common to talk about and we even started a (clean) role play together for one of our favorite series. At the time she was engaged to a man a couple years older than her (she was 23 at the time) and while I never felt like I really understood what was going on, it never felt like he was good to her or like she wanted to be with him. Eventually she began complaining about him to me and I only told her that if she was that uncomfortable with the situation then she shouldn't stay with him. Of course, she awlays found some excuse...

But she gradually started to seem like she cared less and less of how he saw her. After we became friends I convinced her to go to conventions with me and even start cosplaying. To help get her to loosen up a bit, I bet her $50 that she couldn't freak out one of the Link cosplayers at a con we went to just over two years ago. She won the bet of course and I made sure to pay her. :) Then when we went back to the same con a year later, we met the same Link though he didn't recognize us at first. He was a really nice guy and I really liked him a lot, honestly I still do. We managed to exchange information and we all stayed in contact over the rest of the school year and into the summer.

Just after school ended, she broke it off with her fiance.

After we'd been talking for almost three months, I told my best friend that I liked him and intended to visit him and confess. (He lives in another state so I didn't want to do it over the phone) The day before I was going to visit him, I saw that his relationship status had changed on facebook but I decided I would go through with my choice anyway. I was determined to let him know my feelings so that if his relationship ended, he might think of me. My friend called me that same night and told me she knew what I was doing (which confused me) she went on telling me that she was the same way for him.... I became depressed, thinking my best friend was also hurting for a guy that she couldn't have but it didn't make me change my mind.

It wasn't until I got there that I got a notification that her relationship status had changed too...

I wasn't mad that she was with him now but I was hurt that she couldn't explain it in a straight forward manner.

After I returned home, she claimed she'd had no idea that I liked him though I reminded her that I had told her a month before and that I'd even told her I was planning to tell him. However, I'd made the descision that since she was with him I wouldn't say anything about it. I knew it would ruin what relationship we did have. She didn't agree with my choice and told him anyway, forced me to confess to him.

Even now, I wonder why it was her. If I had spoken up sooner, I think it could have been me instead. But like I thought, after he found out that his new girl friend's best friend liked him... It became awkward and even when we tried to talk, it didn't go anywhere.

I felt extremely betrayed by my friend and I still do.

Since that incident she had been harsher towards me. Whenever I express interest in something she likes she challenges whether or not I'm really into it or just copying her. She flat out yelled at me once when I told her I would be cosplaying one of her favorite characters.

Several months ago, her and I were rooming together at school and had plans to go out after work. I got off early and went back to wait but she didn't come back even five hours after her shift ended. I got worried since I hadn't heard anything and I began calling her and seeing if maybe she was online (she lived about an hour away and sometimes when she got upset or depressed she would go home suddenly) but I couldn't find anything. I eventually saw that her boyfriend was online so I messaged him to see if he knew anything but of course he didn't either.

Not ten minutes later, she called me and before I could tell her how worried I'd been, she yelled at me for talking to him and forbade me to talk to him again. She claimed I was trying to steal him from her and that I couldn't be trusted.

Needless to say, I was hurt. I really hadn't said anything more to him than "Hey, do you know where she is?". To me this sounded more like she was simply being insecure and that she must've thought he had some interest in me to be so worried. I didn't tell her this though and I didn't tell him what she'd done either... It would have only sounded like a jealous girl trying to dirty her name.

She never did apologize for that and she only lightened up after I officially began dating another boy (who I'd already confessed to at the time she threw her fit). That relationship didn't work out for it's own reasons but I constantly felt like she was pushing me to stay with him...


I've hardly talked to her within the passed month. One of my school friends invited me to attend Comic Con with her in Denver, CO. It was a great opportunity since she didn't want me to pay for gas or the hotel. I asked her if I could bring my friend with me since she is more into comics than me... When I asked her though she made a big fuss about how it was supposed to be something only the two of us went to and she made a big stink like I'd ruined it by asking....

I never had any intention of going without her and I told her this but I doubt she'll believe me... I've already told my other friend that something came up so I can't go now... and I feel bad for bailing out so suddenly but even if I went, I wouldn't have any fun now.

I won't lie... She's not a bad person and she really does come through for me sometimes... But since last year, she keeps jumping on me for things she used to get excited about... With it like this, I'm not sure if I can stay her friend much longer... And that really hurts.


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