[Trust In A Long Distance Relationship]

If and when you find someone who interests you, and seems to genuinely be interested in you, get that new relationship going on the right foot. Men usually have to be hit over the head with a 4 x 4 several times a week to get their brains working right, so don't hesitate to teach him about relationships, and what is expected of him. Relationships, to be sustained have to be about giving, not getting. When you care about someone, their happiness comes before your own; their needs, their safety, their health,all come first. If the relationship is going to work, BOTH people have to feel the same way about the other. He comes first: She comes first. When you think in terms of how you can pleasure your new partner, rather than how can you get your jollies, and trust to her/him to be concerned about pleasuring you, Then you have something going for both of you. Sex becomes fun, and pleasurable. You listen to him; he listens to you. You teach ; he teaches. You both learn how to pleasure each other. You develope a trust with him because you know that he is going to make you happy, or give his best effort trying. That is when men find it easy to be romantic, to talk to women, to listen to women, and women find it easier to stop making assumptions about " all men", as their girlfriends would have them do so often, and instead treat their guy like he has feelings, and they want to know about them, too. The rewards are mutual, and long lasting, and the couple can experiment, and educate each other as they grow to know each other. Sex just gets better and better, and the orgasms get better, too. It is not " work" making time to be with your spouse, or partner, because you would rather spend time with him/her than to be anywhere else, with anyone else. You do become best friends as well as lovers.

But, explain it to the guys. They are basically dumb. I hate to say that, but I am a guy, and I grew up with other guys, and when it comes to relationships, and sexual compatibility, most men haven't a clue. Sadly, most women today don't have much of a clue, either. Its the blind leading the blind, deaf and dumb! If you want to be with the world's most wonderful lover, you will have to make him yourself. TEACH! and learn. Ask him what he likes and demand feedback from him when you are making love, so you learn what feels good that you are doing to him, and what does not. It will be a new experience for most men. It will also make it much easier for you to talk to him while he is making love to you, so he knows when he is doing something right!

Have fun.

Howard

Thanks, Howard! I appreciate your words of wisdom!!!

[Trust In A Long Distance Relationship]

Can you give us an update? I hope everything is working out.

Thanks for the feedback! He bailed....I tried to talk to him and he turned it all back on me...accused me of cheating on him! He isn't much for talking about feelings,needs,wants,etc. He knows I would never cheat on him but I think that was his way out of not having to deal with any of the issues I needed to deal with. Trying to move on...but keep thinking of the great times that we did have......

[Trust In A Long Distance Relationship]

Can you give us an update? I hope everything is working out.

Thanks for the feedback! He bailed....I tried to talk to him and he turned it all back on me...accused me of cheating on him! He isn't much for talking about feelings,needs,wants,etc. He knows I would never cheat on him but I think that was his way out of not having to deal with any of the issues I needed to deal with. Trying to move on...but keep thinking of the great times that we did have......