The biggest thing I am finding in these replies is the word "stress". I recently went through this with my fella. whom I love and adore with all my heart. However we did go through a period where we didn't have sex. No sex lead to no communication, no communication lead to unsolved issues that ultimately lead to fighting. It's a vicious circle. However we were finally able to open back up to each other and that's when he revealed to me all the stressing factors in his life at the time that, yes, we're causing stress but also depression. I'm happy to say that we are much better now. Although, I'm wondering what could possibly be stressing your husband out for almost five years now? It could have been a major event with work, did he get demoted or lose a position? Is everything going okay on his side of the family life? It sounds like a much bigger issue than him simply losing attractions for his wife. If I had to guess you could do everything to his fullest fantasy and it wouldn't be enough. Get to the root of the stress, you'll get your answer