Kid

Square I appreciate that advice but even though it bothers me it turns me on at the same time I have been with her for 23 years and I love her very much my only issue is that I think she is doing it to hurt me . I have told her I don’t mind her doing it but she wants me to seek mental illness help she said she is not doing anything I did notice that the last 4 or 5 months e have had sex she wanted it very rough I’m packing pretty good she used to say ease up now she wants it as hard as I could give it to her but she still rolls overand secretly will play with herself . I don’t know what to think . She make accusations at me often . I know the last time she was cheating. She swears she is not .the hardest thing is how much I really love her.

I know this feeling wanting more but she doesn’t , how long are you awake after see goes to sleep because I woke up one night and my wife was on the phone and secretly rubbing herself when she saw me awake she just denied everything it made me feel like I wasn’t what she really wanted come to find out she was seeing someone else but told me I was the only one . She had been lying to me for years.

So we where a very happy couple and things slowly started to change . I trusted her about everything I was I love she always had a girlfriend she was bi sexual and I had no issue with that. My only complaint was that she got the affection of another person and I was alone off working. I stayed true to our marriage regardless because to me she was all I wanted . After 15 years together I was off at work and I had an accident. In the accident one of my good friends died . I had went through the windshield and sustained some serious injuries. My company flew her to be by my side immediately we had two children. The kids stayed with family. After 2 days in the hospital they charged me and took me to jail I was 2000 miles from home . I told my wife to clean out my bank account and take the money to take care of our children and she flew back home . Right before she left she told me she loves me and she would be waiting for me with the kids. I stayed in jail for a year and was released. During that year after being locked up for only 3 months she told me it was over that she had moved on I couldn’t do anything it made me sick . I was released I traveled back to my home state and when I arrived she was waiting with divorce papers in hand that was the first thing I came home to . She offered me a place to stay for 3 days if I would sign the papers. In the divorce papers she took everything even 100%custody of of children I tried to fight it but she said sign them now or I will have the sheriff department come and take you away. No given I had always loved this woman and my children and have never done wrong to them. I signed the papers visited with my children and left . It didn’t take me long and I had a job,a truck ,and my own place in just a few months. I was visiting my children ever night after work and she asked me to join the fitness center with her she said it was cheaper if we joined together so I did . We where spending time together and shortly after she asked me to move back home . Excited I did Because I really loved her and wanted my family back . Over the coarse of the next few years I had made a friend the experience preacher to our church he was friends with my wife he had counseled her while I was away . They seemed really close . We where friends for a few years he would preach to us on our front porch. I soon found out that they had slept together she said only once but I had another friend show me the text messages that had been being sent back and forth over the years. I forgave her ran the preacher off . For the next couple years everything was ok but not great you see when my daughter was born I noticed my wife would turn me down for sex but I would catch her master bating when she told me she didn’t want to have sex this went on for years she would even do it right after sex. I don’t gloat but our sex ways amazing she would tell me her body was trembling and she was numb. Now it still happens when I confront her she gets crazy mad and tells me I’m crazy and imagining all this . Now it has happened so much that the last time I thought I could hear her talking to someone while I was asleep. I asked her about it and she threw me out of our house and pulled a gun on me she won’t talk to me about it and now we are getting a divorce over it . I have forgiven her for the wrong she did to me on several occasions. She says I’m mentally ill and need help every one else that knows me says it’s all her. I love her so much can any relate and give advice.