Tyger
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Posts posted by Tyger
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Congratulations!!!!
I'd recommend that you keep getting checked, just to be on the safe side, but I'm so happy for you!
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I also would like to say that our sex talks aren't the sit down and talk about sex type discussions. They're tied in to life lessons, or even when she asks me a question. I'm as age-appropriately honest as I can be, and I really think about what I'm about to say before I say it.
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I find it sad that our youth think that oral sex isn't sex. And that "you can't get pregnant the first time you do it" bullshit.
Sex is sex. If it involves any sort of genitals, it's sex. No and's, if's, or but's about it!
Kris, you're more knowledgeable with what your children can understand. Just please remember that those with any sort of disability are targeted more because they're less likely to report, and are more easily intimidated. Just putting it out there.
Since I was raped at the age of 6, I find that educating my daughter very important. We sometimes joke about it. But, the issues she's had with her father (non-sexual in nature), and him having a live-in girlfriend, who had a baby with him (so there's a lot of it's so-n-so's fault issues), who's not so quiet apparently, has opened the gates of communication. But I started talking about genital parts in 2nd grades.
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Mrs.BettyCrocker gave some great toy suggestion to you!! I'd double the recommendation for the hollow strap on idea. Be sure to check out the harnesses themselves for sizing, because some harnesses are just elastic, others are adjustable. I'd recommend the adjustable ones since you are on oxygen, and you don't want to cut of circulation anywhere.
I'm assuming you've spoken with your doctor. And, if you have, it wouldn't surprise me that he can't give you anything due to your ongoing health issues.
Yes, your GF is absolutely correct, the fantasy of seeing your SO with another, or a 3-some, are common. However, many people are not able to participate in such a fantasy. Women are emotional creatures who usually associate sex with intimacy and love. So, her not wanting to do so, and yes, being turned off by that idea is not surprising. Even though you may have the best intentions, her pleasure, but, to her, you're testing her fidelity, and insulting her feelings for you.
I'd try the toys.
And, instead of suggesting your voyeuristic fantasy (again, which is totally normal), why not suggest a masturbation night. She starts playing with herself for a while, with or without toys, maybe getting off, or just at the edge of getting off, and that's when she climbs on top of you and climaxes on you. Watching her masturbate will be a big turn on, and, once she warms up to the idea, she will get hotter with you getting excited. You could even direct some sessions too. Now, this may not be a thing she's overly gung-ho for in the beginning. Depends on how comfortable she is with her body and sexuality. This is where I also second MBC's suggestion on clit stimulation creams/gels. The more she's excited, the more she'll be willing to do.
So, it may take a few, or several times, to warm up to this. But, if she's willing, I can promise that it will be VERY exciting!!!
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On 6/17/2016 at 11:59 AM, RC4BLUE said:
But it back to my original point. We in the USA need to show much more compassion for everyone. Sexual orientation or even expression is not a reason for discrimination, hate, or violence. Love is love, is love, is love...
I totally agree with this!
I've always been open minded, even before I started swinging for the home team!! LOL
I'm very glad that it's more out there about being LGBT, and becoming a bit more "acceptable" in mainstream. LGBT's aren't shown now in the media as sexual freaks or deviants, and are seen more as responsible members of society, that aren't out there to molest anyone or turn you towards the devil.
Yes, I agree that more people that are in charge, are role models, and have more clout in government should be openly encouraging of LGBT. Times are changing. I can understand why the previous Presidents couldn't or wouldn't promote acceptance with it, due to the times, how it would have been perceived, and the political climate. Understanding and accepting are 2 different things.
Also, the fact that this nation is predominantly Christian, and many Christians, especially 10 years ago, aren't as accepting of LGBT due to misconceptions. More and more people are Coming Out, and so more people KNOW people that are LGBT, and so they can see how people of that REALLY are. The stigmas of being LGBT are lessening, and all of the positiveness people can put out there is going to help.
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I agree. This may be a safe fetish for you. Meaning you can imagine being with them, the "Mom", probably committed to her family, or her child if she's not married. So, there's no commitment there for you to worry about, no expectation, or stress of being in a relationship.
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With my GF, I always want sex, but sometimes I'm just too tired, whether it's physically or mentally. And I'm honest about it to her.
Now, with my ex husband, since he was so uninvolved with me for the last 5 yrs of our marriage, I'd either tell him that I had a headache, or just didn't want too because he had ignored me all day. The latter was usually used, and it was very true. The headache excuse, was half right. LOL
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I know we've messaged privately, and you've posted in other areas about this guy.
Again, please understand that, since he's on the Autism spectrum, he feels things more intensely. He obsesses over things a bit more than others. His social skills may be severely lacking. He's slow to trust, and will have to have repeated confirmation that you care for him, and won't hurt him.
This is what I meant when I asked you if you were truly ready for this type of relationship. It's going to be a bit more work than a relationship with a fully functioning male. Though, the one really good thing about this guy is that people on the spectrum tell it like it is. Sometimes it's a bit too blunt, but you always know where you stand with them! They also take everything at face value.
I agree. Give him a few days. Though, you posted this on Sunday, so I'd be safe to say that calling him (not messaging him) would be best. You texting or messaging over the computer won't have the same effect on him, and he won't be able to get any hints or may misread something. Voice to voice, or even face to face communication is really best in any situation, with anyone, but especially with those on the spectrum.
Please understand that what he does is what he feels at that moment, and from the heart.
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I think that we all have experienced some sort of birth control/protection failings, condoms slipping off, forgetting that little Pill, caps falling off, holes tearing in condoms.
Have you ever had something like this happen personally? How did you cope? If it was something like having forgotten the Pill, say, like forgetting your Rx at home when you went away on a trip, did you use back up? Morning After Pill?
Share you scare stories, and the solutions.
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Lots of us have been or are on dating websites.
Dating is tough regardless, but online can be a bit more tricky due to people being whomever they want to be online.
What are some of your online dating tips?
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16 hours ago, RC4BLUE said:
If you want out of a relationship, be honest with the person you are in the relationship with. Tell that person you are moving on. Have a plan to move on. Be respectful of his/her feelings. It is never easy, but if it were me I would prefer the honesty to any other thing.
Agreed. From a female's perspective, I'd also suggest that you stay away from the cheezy lines like "It's not you, it's me", or "we can still be friends" type statements.
Honesty is the best policy. Just let them know that this isn't what you're looking for, and you don't want to hold each other back from finding true happiness. She may be upset at the time, but, given some time, she'll see it more as a kindness that it was done early on, instead of holding on just to be able to say that you're with someone.
I'd also suggest you do it IN PERSON. Nothing says bad form than doing this over the phone, text, e-mail, and especially right after sex (yes, that happened to me). Be considerate, but also firm, don't give false hope for her to hang on to, or lead her on by saying that maybe you could go see a movie or something every so often.
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As my aunt stated, it doesn't make me a "bad gay" for not going, and I do have a daughter that relies on me for a happy future, so, we're not going. My sister is bi, and is going to Pride, but, since she doesn't have any kids, I don't know if she fully grasps why I'm not going, other than fear. Fear is only a small part of it. Houston does a great job with security as well, but, crazies aren't easily apprehended. My GF agrees with me, and actively encourages us to not go this year. She's been openly, yet discreetly gay for over 25 years. So, she's seen a lot more of this sort of thing first handed, so I definitely respect her opinion on it.
I went to my first Pride event last year, which was very fun, and it was literally the day after they passed the Marriage Equality Act. WOW! Was it crowded!!! LOL
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Thanks for the review Art! Also, if you can, please post the link to the product, to help other dudes find products that work for other guys! There's a shortage of male reviewers and male point of views for male toys!! Thanks for your input!!!!
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On 6/16/2016 at 8:49 AM, Sexy238 said:
Thx frank! I thought it might have something to do with adequacy. He is very well endowed. No problem there. But for some reason he took sex away. Now its on his terms. I feel like just a hole. Like he has to relieve himself.
I missed this part, and for that, I apologized. I would have addressed this in my post had I seen it.
Again, wow, I've totally been where you are. About 5 yrs before I left, my ex husband retreated into his own world of XBox online and doing anything but spending time with me, or his family as a whole. I remember one time, being at a party (one of his friends), and me asking him if he was even going to pay any attention to me at all. He stood by me for about 2 minutes, not touching me, and then walked off. No joke. I told him I wasn't going anywhere else with him if I had to beg him to pay attention to me. I refuse to beg for anything.
Then, he'd get mad when, on the times he tried initiating sex, that I refused him. He even had tried that night of the party, He didn't get that women need intimacy with their spouse, to feel that closeness of being loved and appreciated. Without that, sorry buddy, no dice.
Like Mrs.BettyCrocker, it really bothers me that you feel like he's using you when HE wants it, but makes you feel like just a hole. BTDT. I really have. What you need to remember is that what some people have already posted is very true!!! Sexual intimacy shouldn't ever be used to control you, nor should you feel bad for wanting sex, nor should you feel bad about wanting to try new things.
Some male's egos can't stand that a sex toy will bring pleasure. After all, aren't they the one that's suppose to know all about sex? They think their sexual prowess should be unquestioned. Yeah, that doesn't play. Sexual intimacy should be between 2 loving, sharing people!
Each relationship has it's ups and downs. Yours is a relatively new relationship. Only a year? You should not be dealing with something this heavy as early on in the relationship. Not to sound like a Negative Nancy, but, my and my ex's issues started about 5 years into our marriage. I talked and talked, and tried to get it to open up, but he didn't want to listen, or compromise. The other posters said it right: when only one person in a relationship is doing all of the work, it's no longer a relationship.
I hope things work out for you in the best way for you.
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On 6/17/2016 at 10:05 PM, krisleightate said:
Tyger I agree with you about not going, but as RC4Blue said it does sadden me that we even have to think like that. :-(
I totally agree.
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Did you know that, in some states, if you have an STD, and you don't disclose to your lover you have one, and they contract it, and they can prove that you knew you had it beforehand (Rx bottles are a great way to do so), that the person that had the STD first, can be held liable for any medical expenses incurred because of the non-discloser?
Do you think that this is right? Do you think people should be forced to tell their STD status ahead of time?
I absolutely do!!! If I'd been given the choice, I probably wouldn't have had sex with the guy that had it.
A friend of mine got herpes and the guy that gave it to her KNEW he had it, and was pissed off at the girl that gave it to him, so he thought he'd just infect as many people as he could, including my friend. I personally think there should be consequences for him. But, alas, that was almost 20 year ago, and in a state that, at the time, didn't have such laws in place.
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To me it seems like it's a given that the woman is responsible for the birth control, since she's the one that can get pregnant. But, why exactly is that? I mean, a guy is just as responsible financially, and should be emotionally as responsible for the upbringing of a child. It takes 2 to tango, so how come, generally, it's the woman's responsibility?
Then, of course, is the STD factor. I mean, both people are at risk for contracting something, and, the man is the easiest one to actually get protection quicker.
What are your thoughts?
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Boy, have I been where you are!!!
My ex thought, at first, that toys were a replacement in the bedroom. That, if he was good enough I wouldn't need a sex toy. Let me clue you all in on a little secret, and no offense to my TooTimid family, but, nobody NEEDS a sex toy. It's not like your coochy will dry up and wither away if you don't have one. It's not like water or air. No, nobody NEEDS one. However, nobody NEEDS chocolate either, and yet, we love it! Well, most of us anyway.
My ex knew I had a couple of sex toys and had been using them for a few years before he came along. He was totally against them, and hated the thought of me getting some sex toys to replace him with. It took a while, and several boxes from here, to prove to him that they're an ENHANCEMENT in the bedroom, NOT a replacement. Adding fun and laughter, and of course, pleasure, is always always a good thing when it comes to sexual intimacy with your lover. It can create more trust, bonding, and caring. Sex toys can be an adventure in the shopping for one alone! It can open up dialogues that you never even thought possible!!!
When I got a new box, and when our daughter was asleep, I'd bring out the box, or bring him into the bedroom, show them to him, and let him handle them. I'd let him use them on me first, so as to create a bit of excitement with them. And, after we were done with the toy, I made sure that we were intimate without it as well.
Why, after just about a year after becoming a reviewer, my ex was shopping on here too, and we went to a sex toy shop (sorry TT), and he was the one to pick out our first anal toy for him. He's a "good ole country boy-that will survive (LOL)", and HE was the one to pick out and pay for a Feeldo! He would ask me to request a thing or two to try out, including a male mastubator sleeve!!
For a guy's perspective: Compare it to an extra few things added to a classic car. Shiny new chrome bumper, for example. Does it NEED the shiny chrome bumper to run? Of course not! But it's a lot of fun to look at, and makes it exciting.
My suggestion to you would be to ensure him, gradually, that he wouldn't be replaced by a sex toy, but encourage him to use it on you with you.
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My heart aches for those that were killed/wounded at Pulse this last Sunday. I won't go into the politics of it, so I guess it will be short, but I will say that any religion or organization that wants you to hate others for a reason that has nothing to do with you, is sad, and stupid.
Though I'm still pretty much In The Closet, and don't go out to gay bars much at all, this has made me think even more about not going. After reading some people's articles about gay bars, and finding a place to be ourselves and show affection, I can say that I don't want to go to one at this point due to the hatred. If any organization gets attention like this, it's not like they're going to stop doing such hatred towards people that have done nothing to them.
My GF and I were going to go to the Houston Pride next weekend, but, I have my daughter to think about, and what would happen if I died. Though I'm happy with my GF, and we're staying together, chances are we will be skipping it this year, sadly. We will celebrate in private, and maybe watch some of it on TV if it's on.
I think my heart would ache for any loss of life. And, though new to this side of LGBT, I've always been a supporter of any couple that wanted to be together. As long as the age limits are legal, it's a willing partnership, and they're happy, who's business is it to stick their noses (or guns) into it? It's equivalent of me being offended by seeing a say, a black man and white woman together, showing affection. They're not hurting me, they're happy, and loving. Just a few decades ago, they'd be ostracized, and harrassed, and possibly lynched.
Love is love, no matter who you are.
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Where I do applaud his support for the LGBT community, I do find his lack of saying what the attacks were what they really are. Radical Terrorist Acts. And, IMO, the blaming of guns for people's behaviors is getting old. It's like blaming the car for someone driving drunk, or the spoons making people fat, or the pencil for failing a test. Radicals, criminals, and other undesirables won't NOT get a gun because, oh wait, it's against the law!!! They're doing things illegally, what makes anyone think for a second that outlawing them will make a difference. Does the war on drugs not prove this?
Anyway, sorry about that. Rant over. LOL
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I've dealt with a variety of autistic spectrum people. Please please please understand that, for people on the spectrum, even high functioning Asperger's, it's extremely HARD for them to initiate intimacy. Even harder for them to independently think of saying affectionate words, especially "I love you".
The only way I can explain it, is, think of one of your phobias. A strong one. For many it's spiders. Ok, got it? Now, think of you sticking your hand in a bucket FULL of spiders. For many, just thinking about it causes a great distress. That's kinda similar to how they feel about intimacy or really any form of socialization. Dating is even harder for them. People on the spectrum, again, even high functioning, have a hard time reaching out for physical contact, and sometimes seem awkward and unsure. NEVER laugh at any attempts at him trying to show you how he feels.
They feel more intensely, have a more sincere aspect on feelings, get caught up in one thing, sometimes obsessively. They're usually extremely open and upfront, sometimes seemingly harsh, when in fact, they're just telling it how they know how to do so.
For him to say that he feels very close to you is actually a huge deal for him. Do I think he's playing games with you? Most likely not. Even very high functioning people on the spectrum have basically some sort of social issues. However, being players, users, and basically jerks, really isn't what they're usually like at all.
I have 2 really good friends that hold jobs, are funny, intense, feel strongly, and are really nice men. When they say something, it's always from the heart. They're quick to smile, quick to love, quick to anger, quick to forgive. They have passions, interests (almost obsessively so), and sometimes even crack jokes, though those are kind of rare.
When he says sweet words to you, take them at face value, because he genuinely means them. I'm sure he's doing the best he can by you, and doesn't mean to hurt you. If and when he says "I love you", you know it will be genuine.
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I just posted a review about the Thrusting Gyrating G-spot Rabbit you should check out.
Unfortunately, they seem to add more and more features and gears on rabbits to make them more stimulating, and, since I know your house and family life, be forwarned that these newer ones can be quite loud!
Maybe it's near time for another girl's day out, sans kids?
jungle Jaguar is also a really good one too!!!!
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G-Motion? Well, that's a new happy phrase for me! G-Motion is what Pipedream is calling this rabbit that vibrates in all of the right places AND is designed to stimulate your g-spot! Impossible you say? Oh, contrare! Let me explain a bit!
This wasscally wabbit comes with several fantastically fun features! First, it comes in a fun and informative box, that even has one of those big action pictures of the shaft's head going up and down. Neat! The back of the box has all of the features pointed out, for easy use and education of your new toy. The box has clear inserts that my new pink rabbit goes into. I'm keeping the clear inserts to store it in for safety. This looks like a long toy, since it's almost 11" long in total. However, the insertable length is a little less than 6". So, it's not too big, not too small.
Now, I've tried many-a-rabbit in my day, but this one was particularly exciting for me. Most rabbits either vibrate all over the place, are made of jelly for better flexibility of the toy, or it has those pretty common rotating beads somewhere on the shaft. This one doesn't have jelly or rotating beads.
The rabbit itself is made of Elite Silicone. Though most silicone toys can be boiled and sterilized, this cannot due to the electronics housed in the smooth, slightly contoured hard plastic base. Speaking of the base, that's a great area of fun! The very bottom twists off so you can put the 4 AA batteries in. The base slides out, you put the batteries in, then insert and twist back into place. The twisting back in place is a bit snug, so be aware of that. Also, when you take the batteries out (which you should do in between uses), the base twists a bit hard, and you may have to tap it-gently- to get it out. The seal on it is really good for the waterproof-ness. With the batteries in, it's pretty heavy.
This toy has may vibe options. Each has its own button. The rabbit clit stimulator button is on the top right. The icon is suppose to look like rabbit ears, but to me it looked like a curvy letter M. The shaft's vibe is on the top left, and that icon looks kinda like the shaft. Those have the 3 steady vibes, low, medium and high. Then it has a few different vibe pattern settings as well. Each button controls them independently, so you choose the fun for each of the 3 motors! The middle button is for the G-motion of the head of the toy, making it go up and down (not in a thrusting in-out motion like it kind of states that it does, but kinda like a tapping one). The bottom button shuts the whole thing off, which is the easiest way to do so. However, pushing the motor's buttons for 3 seconds, shuts that particular function off too.
The shaft is smooth silicone, with some ridges where the head starts to bend. The head is curved up a bit, to help stimulate the g-spot better. But, again, it does NOT thrust in and out. It only goes up and down, again, like a tapping motion. With the curve of the head, it creates a very good "come hither" motion, which is key for g-spot stimulation. I will say that when the G-Motion feature is activated, this thing is LOUD! And the higher the setting, the louder it is. The silicone does NOTHING to prevent the noise for that.
The rabbit is decently quiet though. The rabbit houses the bullet that is very powerful and quiet, and gives quite the stimulation. The rabbit's ears also are silicone, and stick out pretty far so you can position them on or around your clit, however you want them. I preferred the rabbit's nose to be right up against my clit myself.
So, on our play night, I'd taken the toy out of the box already, washed it, put the batteries in, and used just a touch of water-based lube to get things started smoothly. And smooth it was. The shaft was off when I put it in, and it was very pleasing. My snatch was very appreciative of the quality silicone sliding into her. I turned the rabbit bullet on first, enjoying the stimulation of my clit, making me wetter and wetter. My girlfriend then turned on the shaft's vibrations (not the gyrating), which felt really good too. We played like that for a while, slowly thrusting it in and out of my wet snatch easily and comfortably. It was awesome! I had to make sure that my clit and snatch were both sensitive and ready for more, and then came the main event. I turned on the gyrating (thumping) motion. Even inside of me, it was still pretty loud. I decided to go slow at first, which felt surprisingly good. After a little bit of that fun, I turned it up to the 3rd steady setting, and was really feeling good. Instead of thrusting it in and out of me, I let the toy do the work. And boy, did it ever!! It felt SOOO good!! This toy was making me cum from, yes, a g-spot orgasm! I was really glad that this pink lovely is waterproof, because I soaked it!
I will say that, after a few minutes of having the shaft on, and having it inside of me, it periodically just stopped the thumping action. Just briefly, like half a second to a second, then it would go on again. This was on the steady settings, and when I was NOT clenching my muscles. This really didn't affect my pleasure at all, I just was a bit surprised when it just stopped, oh, go..........stop.........go........kinda thing. It wasn't all of the time, or a steady issue though.
All in all, this toy is very worth every penny, and does the majority of the work for you!!! I'd recommend this toy for a semi-experienced to experienced toy user looking to stimulate their g-spot. There's a lot going on here with the buttons and motors that may intimidate a new toy user, but, if you're into a new adventure, go for it!!! It tickled me pink enough to get a 4 out of 4 Tyger Paw rating plus a resounding PURR!!!
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What's your DVD guilty pleasure? I'm not talking about porn, I'm talking about a favorite movie, or tv series collection you may have and you love to watch over and over again?
I just finished watching The L Word. Took us a year to go thru 6 seasons due to life getting in the way, and it's not a show I'll watch with my daughter here. It was a great show, and it ended too shortly due to being cancelled, but it was really good.
I also have the complete season of MASH, and all of the available seasons of The Big Bang Theory so far.
There, I've confessed a few.......your turn!!!
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*whining* It's so damn hoooooooot out there!!!!
in The Cafe
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So, the last 2 weeks here, have had high temps, like in the high 90's, but then the heat indexes make it even worse with up to 110 temps!! It's been ridiculous!! I've put tinfoil on the majority of the windows to keep the heat out, and the house is dark because of it (I hate a dark house, but I hate hate hate the high electric bill even more).
Just taking the dogs out makes me (or anyone) sweat like crazy. It sucks.
I do keep a big bowl of water outside for all of the animals.
How's the weather/heat where you are?