needymarriedguy

Hi and thanks. We have thought about trying to get away for a night. A whole weekend may be tough but it sounds good. We live in a very rural area and have a 13yr old with a heavy weekend sports schedule and not many nearby friends or relative to use as sitters although we are working on it. I'd love it if she would have a couple of drinks since I hate drinking alone, but unfortunately she hates the taste of alcohol. I have simple fantasies and would like to keep her in them so I just keep trying. I have told her I would do anything to please her and she repostes laughing with "Well then leave me alone". She defends herself by saying being a wise ass is genetic and runs in her family and from what I have seen of her familiy I guess she must be right. I only wish her sex drive was as strong as her wit. - Thanks for the suggestions

Outside of the bedroom we are the "Perfect Couple". 90% of the rest of life is good so I don't think there are any complaints outside of the norm. I have no desire to cheat, and we get along very well and hardly ever argue and share all the household drudgery. It's just the physical side that is the issue. She is not at all interested in taking our personal issues to an outsider that's what promted my post here. She says there is nothing wrong other than sex is all I think about and makes jokes or wisecracks every time I try to bring it up. It may be nothing other than we both work too many long hours and sex is just not a priority for her. however as I've said in almost 25 years she has hardly ever initiated it. It always has to be me. I'll trade sex for sleep anytime but she's not so driven

I have another question that is realated to this but I'd like to keep this simple. As a first try....What one thing would you suggest to spice up your typical, boring married too long, type of sex ? I've tried oral and lots of affectionate forplay, that seems to be well received, but so far has been very one sided. Thanks

To answer your questions: Let me first say that this doesn't seem to be an age related thing as it's pretty much always been this way. But as I say it seems to be more my problem now that as I get older I just want to enjoy the sex more and it's not a high priority for her nor has it ever been. It's one of the few things in life that's free, healthy and very enjoyable and as we've been together so long there's also no fear of STD's which makes enjoyment even greater as there's no need to worry about protection and we still love each other. We are both physically active, healthy and in good shape. It's just frustrating for me. I'll do anything for her but getting her to want it or reciprocate is difficult. I was wondering if the oral problem can be related to sensitivity or pain but she just doesn't seem to want to answer. 1 - She will give oral to me but only if I ask for it which is another point of contention and then I have to warn her before orgasm as she will not continue at that point. Which is Ok, I know that is also common except that usually there is some delay in the play and leads to a bit of a let down. 2. We do have sex afterwards and she will orgasm or at least it seems that way during intercouse but again she is not one to experiment with different positions and questions what i'm doing if i try moving her about a bit. But then I cannot seem to get a respponse of whether she likes it or not. But she ususally complies. It would be more pleasing to me if she were a bit more proactive and I have told her this many times. 3. yes 5. Yes, one child. We tried for more but after several miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy we surmised it wasn't to be and we gave up. 5. Yes, Catholic as am I, but I know enough other Catholic women where I'm not sure this is the issue although I suppose it could be in some cases. I've suspected there is more to this issue than just putting a halt to the oral. After 25years of marriage is it a hopeless thought that my wife can turn into the vixen of my dreams ? I know from my point of view it's possible as the attraction is still there. Talking about it with her can be difficult as I have tried both during and otherwise. She always seems to want to turn it into a joke or makes wisecracks, such as "Is that all you think about" which possibly is her way to avoid dealing with it or feeling uncomfortable talking about it. Is there any help for the hopeless ? Thanks

We've been married for 25 years and I am still wildly physically attracted to my wife and we have an otherwise great relationship. The problem is that she is not very adventurous in the bedroom and as I get older my sex drive seems to be increasing and I am trying to be more so. She does seem to love receiving oral as I love giving it. The problem is as she approaches orgasm she pushes me away and has had enough and ususally after that it's time for sleep. She refuses to talk about it so I'm not sure what the problem may be. I would love nothing more than to continue to please her. Any advice ? Should I be happy with that, but I feel as though sex always stops before the best part. The felling of being unfulled is happening too often. She is also very non aggressive and in 25 years may have initiated sex 1 time that I can remember. She's not one to talk openly about sex so it makes it difficult for me, I've even considered cheating but don't want to. - thanks in advance for any help yo can offer.