jpar19

Current update: After a few rough weeks, I convinced her to go with me to a counselor. I wasnt sure it was gonna be the answer,epecially since I didnt initially care for the counselor. After the second week, I changed my tune when the counselor expressed what I was feeling to a "T". Seemed like she accepted it coming from a third party. I dont know why, I had been saying the same thing for weeks but when she heard said a different way from the third party it seemed to sink in. She is the kind of person who has a hard time turning off work and projects. Through some work, we've been able to help her leave work at work and focus a bit more on us. It kinda blows being spontaneous but it is better. I've learned it is best for me to speak up and let my desires be known instead of allowing my un-met expectations become frustration and anger for me. I always remember I love the woman, and from time to time there are challenges to intimacy. Our drives still do not match and probably never will but as long as we remember to communicate to each other, we'll be ok. It is not always easy or pleasant to hear but it needs to be said.

Hi guys, New posting to the forum but have been reading for awhile and decided to give this a try. My question is how do you manage mis-matched sexual drives between couples? My wife and I have been married for almost three years (a second marriage for both) and our sexual drives seem to be going in opposite directions. Mine is high and I enjoy the physical contact with her and it provides a much needed emotional connection to her. I feel needed, desired,valued by her etc. Whereas she now says she just doesnt have any sexual thoughts (she had no idea it had been ten days since our last session). When we do make love it is fun and satisifying and enjoy each other very much. How do I manage this? Is there any meds I could take to kill my drive? We are a very loving and well communicating couple but this is really becoming a problem for me. We have discussed it and there are no underlying issues or problems. She can only report that it just doesnt occur to her. She's not meaning to be hurtful, but it is to me. Unfortunately, I tie a lot of importance to that contact with her. Thank you for help. I look forward to your responses.