Boooster

Thanks for all the great input/advice. She just got back from her GYN and he told her that she has a serious infection that has spread pretty deep in her vagina... she has to take antibiotics now for awhile.. i was wondering if it might be me. It sounds funny, but when I was born I received a circumcision that was partially botched. Everything is intact but a little bit of foreskin was left. now, at the end of the day there is always a few pieces of lint (from boxers, towels, pants, etc.) that end up getting stuck there, on the foreskin, and it is a pain to clean, but I have gotten used to it. Even right after a shower there is usually a piece or two (its like a lint magnet!). I am sure in the heat of the moment I must have forgotten a few times to clean it, so could this possibly be a cause for her infection? Getting a little lint trapped inside her vagina might be what the problem is, but I wonder if anyone here has any experience with this, or is of th medical profession that they could shed some light. I am going to see a doctor and to get his opinion, but I figured I'd ask here!

In regards to carbonated beverages, we don't really keep them in the house, and the main thing we drink is bottled water and tea, but since this is occurring only recently, I don't think think it has to do with beverages.. I have been reading up on cranberry juice though, and would having a glass a day (or every few days) help her body fight an infection, or what leads to an infection? And yes, spit is one of our sources of lube (also KY jelly), but we both brush our teeth twice a day (5 nights out of 7 on average, the rest in the morning), so I have a hard time believing that's the reason

Thanks for the quick reply! She has an appointment with her gynecologist in a few days, and she plans on interrogating him then . I just hope it isn't something more serious...

Ever since becoming sexually active with my girlfriend we seem to have a problem... At the end of every month (when it is time for her period) she develops an infection down there. The first time we passed it off as something that happens, the second time I thought it might be me, so I payed extra extra attention to be super clean with my hands/penis when engaging in sexual activity... all to no avail. Now this is the third month and the third time this has happened and it has us really confused. Each visit to her gynecologist told her it was an infection, he gave some pills/cream antibiotics and it went away in a few days. I got tested for a UTI also about two months ago in case I had something, but the results were negative. The only possible thing I can think of is that sometimes when we are together i finish inside and she doesn't always go pee right away, but might sleep the night (but that only happened once or twice this month). Can someone suggest what this might be, or what we might do to prevent this? It sucks that every month she has to go through this.. Thanks for reading

I've read over this forum quite a bit and I think it's a great that people can come here with their problems and questions... I need some advice with my relationship. I have been with this woman for a little over four months, and it seems our relationship has its ups and downs. I am sort of a "late-bloomer" when it comes to sex/relationships. I have been with women before her, very rarely reached orgasm, and never really felt what I thought I should have (one-time deals, or short flings). She is the first woman I have ever been in love with, and I don't feel like I can communicate as well as I would like, and it might be hindering our relationship from progressing. The last few weeks we have had a chance to spend quite of bit of time together (I have moved closer to her, unrelated, and we see each other a few times a week), which is wonderful, but we have some problems that I know we can get past, but we dont seem to be able to. We are both very affectionate and sensual with each other, but it seems like our sex drive is mismatched. I can't seem to get enough of her.. I love cuddling with her, kissing her, caressing her; lying together in bed is so amazing for both of us. It seems though that when I try to take the next step, alot of times she isn't very receptive. Part of the problem may be about her difficulty climaxing... She tells me she has never climaxed with another guy before, so anytime she does she basically masturbates and I'll send my fingers right before she finishes. In past relationships she used to put her pleasure behind the other persons', and just got used to being disappointment sexually. I have tried to pleasure her manually and orally, and a few times I have come quite close, but she pushes me away... We have talked about it, and we agree that there is some sort of block she has put on herself. It is very frustrating for me, because I want to pleasure her so much; I don't feel like she enjoys sex as much as I do, and that might be a cause for lower sex drive. In a given night I will usually orgasm once. When I want more she doesn't seem interested and I can see that she is uncomfortable if I try to touch her or initiate something else, so we usually end of cuddling, and my penis will be up for half the night. The two times I decided to masturbate she got hurt/offended because she felt like she wasn't satisfying me... what can I say to that? She does satisfy me when we are together, but my sex drive is so much higher than hers. I dont want to lie, but telling her the truth will make me feel and sound selfish, and just end up hurting her more. I know I am not selfish but I am always left wanting more. I don't know what to do regarding her orgasms... I try to stimulate her but it's difficult to learn what she likes; even asking her doesnt really help (she says she likes everything I do, and thats it's her not me). She also doesn't like me looking at her pussy, so it's hard to see what she likes; she says it makes her uncomfortable and she feels like it's private. She says I am good for her, and I believe her, but I hate that I can't bring her to orgasm. Also, a little while ago we were typing dirty, and we were saying some pretty dirty stuff... at some point I said to her next time I see her I want to her shave everything off and I want to go down on her in the car (she was picking me up) and she flipped out. I mean really flipped out. For me it was part of the game, but ever since she doens't let me go down on her... yesterday when I tried she told me what I said made her feel humiliated and she doesnt feel comfortable when I do. I told her and she knows that she took it way out of context (I hit a sensitive spot with that remark without intending to), and I don't know how to make her feel comfortable with me down there again... She loves it when I do, and I love pleasuring her (and I find it a huge turn on doing it too). She keeps telling me she is the one with all the problems and that she needs to work on them... I want to work on them together but most times when I broach the subject she pushes me away and says she doesnt want to talk about it, and when I push that we should talk about it it leads to the cold silence. She also said something interesting to me last night... first of all she will joke around sometimes about leaving me, and I've told her I don't like it (she has stopped)... it's not that she isnt happy with me or doesnt love me, just her way of joking around (or maybe I am fooling myself). But seriously, she is happy with me, she just has a tendency to say things like that because thats how she talks. Until last night. We were lying in bed talking and she got silent on me and she shared some things with me. She told me that for many years she was with guys for the wrong reasons, and she became used to being disappointed with relationships. She has always left her partners, never been dumped. And she told me that she has thought about leaving me sometimes, but then she realizes what that what actually mean, not having me in her life, not seeing me, and she realizes she is just being stupid and having those thoughts because she'd be doing me a favor and I deserve better(more or less her words). I was hurt of course, and ended up going to sleep a little while later. I woke up and she told me that she loved me and not to listen to what she says sometimes, she isnt herself. That what we have is the best thing she has ever had. It seems like everytime we are together one of us ends up getting hurt. I'd say more than half of the time when we say our goodbyes there is something wrong by that point. One, or both of us are hurt and it just makes the rest of the day (for me at least) too reflective on what went wrong and why. Just this morning we got up and she said she would make breakfast when I pulled her back to bed and said breakfast could wait a little. She just fake-smiled said "unbelievable" and went to make breakfast. I asked if anything was wrong and of course she said no. Silent breakfast, she went back to bed complaining about a stomach ache from her period (which hasnt started yet is supposed to any minute). I asked again if what I said insulted her and said no, but she stayed in bed for three hours, not reacting to anything I did (trying to cuddle), so I gave up. She got up, showered, and left, and here I am typing this confused as hell as to what this relationship is (she just now sent a text message saying she's sorry, she isn't herself lately). I one time saw her as a very possible future wife but the way things have been I don't know. I love her so much but it seems like I am in pain more often than not over us. Maybe this is just her reaction to finding something real for the first time, or my finding someone I love for the first time, and it's just a phase, but let's say I find myself alone thinking sometimes... I don't want to give up on our relationship at all; our good times together are so amazing and I've never been happier... I just need some advice on how I can go about getting her to open up and talk to me, and what I can do to help her. Thanks for reading all this, I dont think I've ever written anything this long in english before (not my first language).

Well, she is on the pill right now and we have both been tested clean, so I'm not worried of getting an STD from her... as for pregnancy I suppose it is always a worry but not one I am truly worried about since I have seen her take the pill in front of me and I do trust her.... We have a great relationship both sexually and non-sexually and we are very open and honest with each other when we talk.. because of career and logistics we don't get to see each other as often as we like. As for my erection while masturbating I can maintain a constant erection, but it doesn't seem to stay 100% erect all the time... I can usually bend it a little and it doesn't stay in the "unbendable" state very long. Strangely, approaching orgasm seems to have it remain relatively soft before the moment when it hard again (about 50% of the time). No medical causes for this problem... I am not taking anything, not a diabetic, I eat well and excercise... and no, I don't usually drink alcohol before sexual activity... I was actually thinking of getting a little bit tipsy one night beforehand to see if that might help.

I've looked around the forums and read the articles on this site and thought I'd take it another step and ask for advice from people here who have experienced these sort of problems... First a bit about myself. I'm 24 years old, and I recently met a woman whom I am absolutely crazy about... my first relationship, first time I am "consistently" sexually active. I have been with other women but it never really did it for me... Emotionless sex never seemed to turn me on like other guys. I am in great shape, eat healthy, am active in running, rock climbing and other physical activities. I suppose I was shy and not too confident as a teenager (who wasn't a little bit?) but I am very easy-going, confident, and happy nowadays so it doesn't make sense. I am honest with myself and when I am with her I don't consciously worry and ask myself if "it" will happen again... if I do worry it must be subconscious. When I am with her I find that she can very easily make me hard, but the moment she starts stroking me, or going down on me, or even when we start to move into a position for penetration, my penis will usually lose its hardness, but everything she does feels great... my penis is still hard, but doesnt stand fully erect - it is a little flacid... this makes penetration challenging and sometimes a lost cause. When I do enter her most times I lose my erection fairly quickly (1-2 minutes). Even when I masturbate though, I am not usually fully erect, but rather a tiny bit flacid, which leads me to think it might not be psychological but rather physical. I am going to the doctor tomorrow for an unrelated reason and plan to bring this up with him/her. Any advice would be appreciated.