Man Performing Oral Sex

[trickychick]

OK, my man has never been much of an oral sex giver, Im not really sure why, but in the past we got into this...rut, where if he went down on me I would freeze in anticipation and disbelief, making him think i didnt like it...bit of a catch 22.

I emailed him something about it from here, and said, do you need me to tell you what to do? he said yes. i said 'you need to go there and have a good look around '(because he never has) he said he feels no need to stare at it, this surprised me a bit, I thought , being male, he would?

We agreed, that as an adult, you meet someone and assume they just know what to do, and from what we've talked about, neither of us has really known what to do and in any case, everyone likes different things so we have been blind to each other for a good 7 years. This is sad.

Ive never come across a man before who didnt like giving oral, and he tells me I dont smell or anything bad like that, which I knew anyway, but how to get him down there, enjoying himself (and me) more often?!

The only idea I have is, once again, me being tied up and letting him loose with a spotlight!! lol! Seriously though, if he has unlimited access to these parts, maybe he will grow to like them more? Even telling him pretty bluntly 'i want more oral sex' has not made him put in loads of effort...maybe hes just not that sort?

I dont know what to say/do..

PS i do love him, he's rare, and as sexy as when we first met, we have 3 gorgeous children and im not leaving him again, so 'working through it' suggestions definately appreciated!!!

[trickychick]

You didn't say anything about it, so I have to ask if you are either shaved, or have considered shaving your pussy hair, or at least cropping it, so he gets not only increased visibility, but a lot of bare skin to lick? A number of women I know, and others who have posted here have indicated that their lovers were a lot more enthsiastic about doing oral sex on them when they had shaved the hair off! A bare pussy is something different, at the very least, and both men and women report how much more sensitive women are to oral sex when they are bare.

Yes, I do shave, I only leave a landing strip, sadly he doesnt take notice of this or comment on it...dont really know what he thinks, hard to get him to say anything unless hes had a little drink. He shaves too.

Last time he gave me oral, it was good, but I think he expected miracles straight away, and when I dont come he seems to clam up and not want to do it again.

It sounds like both of you have made one of the most basic, and serious mistakes two adults can make, and that is to assume that your partner knows what to do about anything regarding sex. You have to teach him, to the point of taking his hand in yours, and using his fingers to touch yourself so he can learn how much pressure to use, when to use it, when to change it, how many fingers to use, what to touch, what not to touch, etc. You have to give him a running dialog at least one time as you go through having sex, so he knows what you are likeing, and what doesn't give as much of a thrill.

Youre right. It just seems weird to do this, I have tried but not very hard, as it feels so odd to talk constantly although I dont mind the showing part. Its something ive yet to try properly, maybe I will soon.

Thanks