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Two questions....


Ecko18031

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SO two serious questions.  To preface it really quick I am happily married and love my wife but we barley have sex and I really desire that physical attention.   With that being said I have two questions...

1- I have been camming for a couple years and absolutely love it.  IT is thru a site where people charge but I do it for the thrill... would you consider this cheating? I just love knowing someone is watching me. 

2- My wife and I went thru a rough patch after having our first child and I felt completely forgotten about.  I signed up for ashley madison and ended up connecting with a woman.  We chatted a bunch but never had sex.  We met one time and nothing really happened.  I still feel a lack of physically intimacy with my wife (she says sex just feels weird now after two kids).  I kind of want to explore this other woman.  She is married and a lot older than me which attracts me to her.  Any thoughts or input?  

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That’s tough in my opinion- I have always been of the mindset that if you are going to cheat, then you shouldn’t be married.  If you are that unhappy that you must seek other physical fulfillment then there is a lack of respect for your partner.  

 

Ibdint know if this willl work in your situation, but just communicate with her . 

Have you asked why it feels weird for her now? Have you tried to understand where she is coming from? Have you asked Her if she has any idea what would fixnit, it if she even wants it fixed? 

Indint know the right answer, the only point I am pushing is that marriage is a give and take, respect and respect. 

Mid she is having a hard time , then it is your duty as her husband to stick by her side and help her through it. If you would rather seek other companionship and she is not worth that effort, then I don’t think y’all should be together. 

 

Not judgement , just my opinion 

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Thanks Papa.  I have definitely listened and tried to help.  I agree with the idea of if you are married you are married.  I guess I can detach the sex and love part of it.  I understand and respect where she is coming from but I cannot just put my issues in a box and forget about them.  This is why it is all tough for me.  

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I understand the toughness- I almost made the same mistake- I have been married for just under 7 years, we have 2 kids.  We were not communicating, not really talking to each other. It was like having a roommate.  She internalized it and so did I- we never talked about it just went about our daily lives. I came really close to cheating and it hit me to talk to her about what was REALLY going on. I had decided that if these issue we couldn’t work out then it was time to move on. 

Upon talking and getting everything out on the table, and a huge knock down drag out fight. We came out in the other end with a better understanding of each other then we have ever had before.  It is completely amazing now the difference that transpired when that respect comes back.  

I cant tell you what to do, all I can do is share my experience.  But in my opinion (especially with kids involved) talk  to her and figure out if it is even salvageable- of it is not then move on. 

 

You go go and cheat, that hurts her, hurts the kids, in my opinion just makes it worse.  And eventually the marriage is going to be over anyway. 

 

Again, my two cents

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