I recently went on a three week trip with a friend who has Asperger's-I can't imagine living with her for ten years. I can tell you this, when someone with Asperger's has a 'routine' that they are used to following, they may be able to deviate from it occasionally, but it is very difficult for them to change it. In order to change the way your husband physically acts during sex would actually be a long process. It's too bad that he was diagnosed so late in life or some of his rigidness may have already been dealt with. Good luck with your life with him and whatever you decide to do.