slartibartfast

Thanks so much for the help. I think I'll get evanessence - sounds perfect!

Hi, I'd really like to get my wife interested in watching some kind of porn with me. At the moment she loves it when romantic movies get 'steamy' and I think she'd love it if she could get over her initial 'gross' reaction. Any ideas for a realy gentle introduction for her? She probably wouldn't (at first) go for anything with 3somes, girl on girl anal or anything like that....

Thanks guys 'n' gals.... Time to invest in some lube. She'd originally said she didn't want to, so I believed her and didn't buy any lube...Silly me!! At the moment she only ever really shows an interest in anal when she's got her period, so anything with her rosebud is usually out of the question... I don't know if that'll change when she's had a more positive experience of anal. I sure love the idea of my member in one hole and my finger in another.... She's taking a while to open up to all this kind of stuff, but that's fine with me - it's her I'm after not the experience!! I was trying to be extra slow and careful, but I'll really build up slooooooooooooooooooooooowly next time!

Hi, It took a long time for it to happen because I didn't want to be a pressure merchant, but we tried anal sex short while ago. We both loved it! She went crazy in a way I've never experienced before. Makes me grin just thinking about it!!! Thanks to everyone here who helped me get my head sorted out about it in the first place! But she felt really sore afterwards, and says she doesn't want to do it again. I tried to take it really sloooooow and gentle, but because it wasn't planned we didn't have proper lube and ended up using baby oil. Is that the reason she's sore, or is it just something that happens, is it just because it was new, or was I doing something wrong? Any ideas? Thanks in advance. It's great to be able to ask about stuff like this!!

Hi, I've posted a couple of times on the forum, and thought I'd come over here and properly introduce myself! I live in the beautiful Cornwall in England. (don't think tootimid ship here ...) My wife and I are just discovering that there's a lot more to making love than just missionary and doggy style! We haven't actually bought any toys yet, but we will soon - hopefully when my next cheque (check for you 'mercans) comes through... So, erm... Hi!!

cool. It's good to hear other peoples experience of it! We still haven't actually had anal sex, but I've been touching her there, which she loves. I really don't want it to be a bad experience for her, so I want to wait until it feels right (so to speak!). It's good to hear from women who really do enjoy it!

Finally I got the courage up to talk about it properly yesterday, and I was instantly branded a total perv! "I can't believe you'd want to do something that gross" kind of thing. Then last night, after getting drunk at a party, when we got into bed she was all randy and suddenly said "actually I do like it!" and virtually shoved my fingers up there! I was really pleased, but would have been more so if I wasn't too drunk to get it up!

Hi, I never really considered anything anal until recently - it just didn't occur to me to be honest! But then I noticed my wife getting more and more excited the closer my fingers got to there. The thing is that she loves it, until she realises that's what I'm doing, and then she's horrified that I've done such a thing. I've tried to talk about it, but got nowhere. I think it's partly the result of a heavily religious upbringing, but I don't know what to do about it....any ideas?

Thanks guys, I think a bullet it is - I had sort of thought that before, but it's good to have it confirmed! good idea about the articles. I tried to get her to read the one about shaving 'down there' (she does already, and I thought it might lead her in the right direction but she wasn't very happy about some of the comments. Yes, I do use oral and digital stimulation, by the way. Not much, as she's not always very keen on even that!

I currently have erection problems due to illness (I've talked about that in another thread) and I really want to get my wife a toy, so she can still have some fun! We've been married for 14 years, and never needed/wanted one, so I have no clue as to what type to get... Thing is, she doesn't like the idea of toys at all. She's quite a traditionalist - I've only recently got her interested in oral sex, and even then she's not that keen. I want to bring her round to the idea gently, so as not to freak her out, and also to find something really gentle, easy and totally non-scary!! I'd really appreciate anyone who can point me in the right direction!

Hi, I've been thinking more about this. I think maybe I should suggest getting a toy of some sort for her stimulation. I am actually quite worried about the fact that she hasn't 'come' for a long time. It's not really like her, and I think it would do her a load of good just to forget about stuff for a moment. Any suggestions? I've read a few of the articles here, but I'm still not really sure. At the moment she doesn't like the idea, so it would have to be something very, very gentle and easy to use. I'm not sure whether a dildo, vibrator or whatever would be best... edit - I think I'll ask that one on the sex toy forum....

Thanks for your thoughts. I did go to my doctor to ask about viagra. The thing is that the cost is prohibitive. We don't have much cash, and it would cost about £10 per session of sex. I will get some at some point, but it's not financially possible for it to be a solution. I've seen adverts for other products, which you take over a period of time to improve blood flow, but I have no idea if they work, and if they do whether they'd help me.... I am totally into exploring each others bodies all over and with all available senses, but my wife struggles with such concepts. She doesn't mind it for a little while, but only as a small part of foreplay.... I guess I'll just have to try harder to win her around to those ideas. I like the idea of masturbation nights as you call it, Howard, but I don't think she'd be up to that yet! I'd never understood what cock rings are for. I'm going to look into that. I think I'd be happier about the idea of using other toys if I could perform properly. At the moment, it really would be trying to replace my cock in a sense, which is not what I want!

Hi, My wife and I have been married for 14 years now, but over the last couple of years I've developed post-viral fatigue, which has unfortunately started to affect my penis. I really struggle to get an erection, and if I do, it often doesn't last. However, I'm still just as randy - maybe even more so as I want some comfort! The problem is that not only is my cock affected, but it's also had an impact on my wife - she's had to take on a lot of stuff I used to handle, like the bills and parental stuff, and I just can't help out as I used to. She's really stressed, and as a result hasn't had an orgasm for ages, even if I do get a hard-on. She used to want sex a lot, but as a result of her stress combined with a knowledge that I probably can't get it up, she mostly brushes me off. I know some really good sex would really help us both... But she's resistant to anything out of the ordinary. Dildo's or vibrators are out - she even struggles with finger play and oral (although to be honest I would rather not use toys either - I want to be the thing she puts in there!). Also the idea of watching porn together would result in major strife - as far as she's concerned it's immoral in many ways. As far as some porn goes, I probably agree, but I don't think it's all abuse... Don't get me wrong - she is adventurous and sexy, but her boundaries are different from mine, and in the circumstances I really want to try and get her to expand them. It wasn't a problem before, and we used to have great sex, orgasming together pretty much every time, and feeling so amazingly close. Her parents are of the 'don't talk about it because it's dirty, but if you're married the missionary position is just about OK' school, and she's already gone a long way from that. I'm trying to gently win her over to the idea that there's more to sex than penetration, but I'm not succeeding. I've tried to talk to her about it, but she just says that she finds the feelings 'too much' if I try to stimulate her with my fingers or tongue. Any ideas?