Sam, I will speak like a big sis here: If the intimate part of a relationship was like a meal: Foreplay(with each other) is the appetizer, Sex (with each other) is the Main Course, Flirting (harmlessly with other people) is the dessert and Sex ( with someone other than who you are married to) is the After Dinner Mint. As in MOST meals, the after dinner mint is OPTIONAL and NOT needed to satisfy hunger. Think about how this relates to your relationship......