More Smiles For The Day

[Tyger]

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dogs and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........ Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The

Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in

the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in

an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's

in both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it

I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works

is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or

two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally

complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now

enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was

that why I ended up in the hospital.

I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit

me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.

[me4now]

that was cool it amazes me how people get so caught in the most craziest things right i have to carried out for laughing so hard way to go

[MysticLady]

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dogs and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........ Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The

Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in

the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in

an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's

in both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it

I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works

is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or

two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally

complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now

enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was

that why I ended up in the hospital.

I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit

me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.

OMG ! People believe the craziest things, for example:

Someone tells you there are a billion stars in the sky, you believe them. But when a sign saids "Don't touch, wall wet" you have to see if its true .

Liesl

[Valntyn]

Tyger!! *roflroflroflrofl* Oh my gosh!! I can't stop laughing.

I have to admit, that while I was reading through this, knowing you as I do, I wondered if you really did this or if it was a joke... until I got toward the end. *laughlaugh* I wouldn't have put it past you, though, to have told that poor (albeit numb) lady this!!! Hahahahahahaha!!!!

[Tyger]

I have pulled pranks like this, but, alas, no, it wasn't me *this time*.....

[whiskeywoman]

This reminds me of something hat one comic would say "heeeres your sign"

Actually, I would have said "heres your billboard" lmao!

[Tyger]

A man in Phoenix calls his son in N.Y. the day before Christmas and

says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and

I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says.

"We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call

your sister in Chicago and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck

they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"

She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT

getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling

my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a

thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says,

"they're coming for Christmas and paying their own way."