Over Active Sex Drive

[krisleightate]

In the past six months my sex drive has gone through the roof, and my common law husband works away so he is gone for 2 weeks at a time. Toys haven't helped much and I have cheated bc of my "need" for lack of a better term. I was wondering if any one has any suggestions on how to make my sex drive lower.

[Mikayla1]

I want to say something and I really, really hope that it doesn't sound snyde or disrespectful.......but, WHY on earth are you complaining about having a HIGH sex drive? We hear soooo many women here who are concerned that they have NO sex drive. They are having problems in their marriage because they do not want sex. They have lost interest or are going through a draught. These women have issues and problems ranging from low hormone levels, to post-pardum to other things. This is a much more difficult dillemma.

Now, I understand that it can be FRUSTRATING if you have a high sex drive and no way to release it - but honestly, is there anything wrong with masturbating to get your release? I can not believe that you have gotten all you can from your toys/ There is a world of toys and activities out there that can help you to get the sexually release you need!

You can rent some movies, have phone sex, take time to really get aquainted with your body and pleasure as Howard suggests. Believe me honey, there are so many worse things than having a HIGH sex drive - at least this way you can become more in tune with your body which will only help your relationship.

I can not imagine one woman with a low sex drive who would not want to trade with you in a second. I guess for some people, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence (or bed!)

[Tyger]

Well, I've been quiet, waiting to see what others pass along, especially since I know you.....

As for the high sex drive, yes, you're young. At 24 I was a racing hormone too. I had a BF at home with me almost all of the time, so I didn't have to worry about not getting any.

However, if there were times that he was gone for work, or on a vacation with the boys, and I had to go without, I did so. Granted, it wasn't very long, but, if I got the urge, I used toys, or my fingers. And, for the record, most of my friends were guys at that point in time too. There were a couple that would've loved to have sex with me, and they had made it well known. It was an ego boost for sure. But, I wanted to be loyal and true to him, my BF. We were, after all, in a committed relationship. I had good friends to go out and do things with, if I had to keep my mind occupied.

Now, knowing a bit more of your story than you're letting on, I won't delve too deeply. What you make known here, is your business.

I will say this though, having male friends that you KNOW will sleep with you doesn't mean you have to do so for them to still like you. If they don't like you when you tell them NO, then they're not your friends, they're just guys looking for an easy fuck. I don't know your most of your guy friends, but, I do know that a lot of guys come across as being sweet and nice, just so they can get in your pants. Is there a history of that? You may need to re-evaluate the kind of people you choose to let into your life. Some people are better at it than others, this isn't a bad thing, or makes you a "stupid person", so don't think that at all. People tend to go for the same type of people, unwittingly. A major effort has to be consciously made before these things will change.

There's nothing wrong with having a high sex drive. It's how you choose to let it loose, so to speak. Using toys, and your hands for a physical release are great ways for that. But, I know you're home alone a lot, and no real way of getting around, so you may be a bit bored. Finding something to keep the mind occupied is also a great way not only to keep your mind off of sex, but to better yourself and your surroundings. Sometimes, when I get bored, frustrated, or just plain geeked, and I don't wanna be at the computer (yes, those times really DO happen), I call a friend, clean the house, exercise, find a project to do, read, write letters (I know you write poetry!), go for a walk, take pictures, do yard work, or just take a nap! Keeping your mind occupied is key.

You also need to really take a deeper look into your relationship with your CL husband. Do you love him, or stay with him out of habit? Until you figure that out, sleeping with others isn't going to help you figure any of that out, it'll just confuse you even more.

You can always call me or IM me too (as always).

Best wishes and *hugs*