Tyger Posted September 18, 2007 Report Share Posted September 18, 2007 DifferencesBetween Women And Men 1.NAMESIf Rebecca, Linda, Anna and Jeanne go out for lunch, they will call each other Rebecca, Linda, Anna and Jeanne. If Mark, Harold, Dave and Rob go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.2.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Harold, Dave and Rob will each throw in a $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 3.MONEYA man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale. 4.BATHROOMSA man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.5.ARGUMENTSA woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument.6.CATSWomen love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. 7.FUTUREA woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 8.SUCCESSA successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 9.MARRIAGEA woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.10.DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage,answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.11.NATURALMen wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night.12.OFFSPRINGAh, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. 13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY All married men should forget their mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members krisleightate Posted September 18, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 18, 2007 OMG Tyger can I repost this on my Blog???????????? LMFAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Emily Posted September 19, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 19, 2007 Tyger! I love it, so true, all of them. Keep the funnies coming! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Cinam0nStyxx Posted September 20, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 20, 2007 DifferencesBetween Women And Men 1.NAMESIf Rebecca, Linda, Anna and Jeanne go out for lunch, they will call each other Rebecca, Linda, Anna and Jeanne. If Mark, Harold, Dave and Rob go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.2.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Harold, Dave and Rob will each throw in a $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 3.MONEYA man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale. 4.BATHROOMSA man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.5.ARGUMENTSA woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument.6.CATSWomen love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. 7.FUTUREA woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 8.SUCCESSA successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 9.MARRIAGEA woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.10.DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage,answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.11.NATURALMen wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night.12.OFFSPRINGAh, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. 13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY All married men should forget their mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Cinam0nStyxx Posted September 20, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 20, 2007 Incredibly funny...mostly because it is so true!! lol I have to get my SO to look at this .thank you again!Cinamon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gemini26 Posted September 21, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 21, 2007 I've heard some of that before but it cna never get old! Thanks for a needed laugh!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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