Members kellijane1 Posted December 12, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 12, 2007 Ok...I know that is horrible to say, but for me its true. I was reading some posts and every one seems so confident and happy with sex, and its a chore to me. How can I be like that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jesso Posted December 12, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 12, 2007 There are alot of different aspects of sex. Its not just thrust, repeat thrust. Perhaps you haven't found what really gets you going, what really turns you on. Maybe you need to explore different options/interests of sexuality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mikayla1 Posted December 13, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 13, 2007 Oh honey, not everyone on here is 'content and happy' about sex! There are SOOOOOO many people here that need help, ideas, encouragement, etc. It is something that is a constant learning experience! You say sex is a chore for you? There has to be a reason why you feel that way. If you were enjoying it, pleasing yourself and your partner - then it would not be a chore - that is for sure! Sex is adult playtime. Sex is something that should be enjoyable and FUN! If you are not having fun, laughing, sharing, pleasing - then of course it will be a chore! You need to tell us a little more about your situation. Why do you feel it is a chore? Are you married? Long time, short time? Do you orgasm? do you masturbate? Do you enjoy all kinds of sex - or none? Have you always been like this or is it recent? Try answering some of these questions and perhaps we can find some solutions or ideas! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members kellijane1 Posted December 13, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted December 13, 2007 Well, I am not married. I have been in a relationship for 2 years, and my boyfriend just wants to get through foreplay and the sex to orgasm. I have never had an orgasm, I masturbate, but this may sound dumb, but I don't know what I'm doing, so I just bought my first toy, so hopefully that helps and hopefully I got the right one. I always try to get my boyfriend to role play or do something fun and exciting, but he wont and he thinks it is a waste of time. I'm only 20 years old and I feel like I should be having this great sex life, but I'm not. I use to have fun with sex when I was with my last boyfriend, but I still wasn't able to have an orgasm. I have always been shy about it, but I'm tired of not being able to have fun during sex, so I hope someone can help me.Oh and I don't mean to sound conceded but I am a beautiful girl, so its not that I feel ugly or anything. Please give me some advice..I am dieing to orgasm! Oh honey, not everyone on here is 'content and happy' about sex! There are SOOOOOO many people here that need help, ideas, encouragement, etc. It is something that is a constant learning experience! You say sex is a chore for you? There has to be a reason why you feel that way. If you were enjoying it, pleasing yourself and your partner - then it would not be a chore - that is for sure! Sex is adult playtime. Sex is something that should be enjoyable and FUN! If you are not having fun, laughing, sharing, pleasing - then of course it will be a chore! You need to tell us a little more about your situation. Why do you feel it is a chore? Are you married? Long time, short time? Do you orgasm? do you masturbate? Do you enjoy all kinds of sex - or none? Have you always been like this or is it recent? Try answering some of these questions and perhaps we can find some solutions or ideas! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mike_d Posted December 13, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 13, 2007 First off, there is no problem with saying you are beautiful, that is a healthy attitude towards your own appearance and that is great. Second, if you have enjoyed sex in the past and are not enjoying it now, the simple soloution is to look at what has changed. If your last guy made it fun and this one has not, it would seem as if you have the soloution. Next, I have never been a woman, and therefore never masturbated as one (*Takes a page from Tygers book and checks the old twig and berries down stairs*) and so I can't give you proper advice on who to do so. I can say check the sex education tab up there and read about masturbation if you are curious. Mikayla has written many many great articles for this site and I know there is one dealing with how females should best go about exploring their own sexuality and masturbation. I will agree with my "bed fellows" and say that you should be having a much higher level of enjoyment from sex. If this guy is out for himself, than you need to educate him on how to please a woman, namely you! If he is unwilling, tell him to shape up or ship out sailor. We don't deal with selfish lovers in these parts. He gets his, why shouldn't you be getting yours? (over and over and over!!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted December 13, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 13, 2007 Why is your guy in such a hurry? It's not all about his pleasure, it's about yours too.As far as masturbating, only you know what feels best to you. You can't show him what you need if you don't know what it is that does it for you. Try reading some erotica, or watch some adult movies, it's what ever makes you feel sexy and gets you in the mood.And let him know you need *alone* time. There's nothing wrong with that. He has his alone time and you should have yours. Once you find out what it is that works for you, you can show him. Your guy also needs to understand that foreplay is a necessary thing, we as women take a bit longer than men do, but once we get going we go for the long run If you tell him how unhappy you are, as a good lover he should want to please you. After all you're pleasing him. If he's truly not willing to please you, then maybe you need to move on. You deserve pleasure too and sex shouldn't suck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members pappyld04 Posted December 15, 2007 Members Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 What was it with your former lover that you found fun? That is the type of sex you should be having at your age. Whether or not you orgasm is a whole different point of it but you should be at least figuring out the pleasures basics of sex. I have heard a lot of women say they have never had an orgasm and I doubt if I could ever understand why since I'm not a female. Most of the women I know that do not have them are the ones who are stuck with a man like your present lover who cares nothing about his partner and knows even less about how to give pleasure. I do hope you learn to please yourself since that is the only way you will ever know what sex is supposed to feel like with a caring partner. And the only way you can teach a man to please you. You really should have a talk with this new guy and tell him this is UNACCEPTABLE!!!! I don't think being pretty is considered conceit. But many ladies do not feel pretty and that does cause some problems. So you are at least one step in the right direction and you are here seeking to learn more. Reading the education articles is HIGHLY RECOMMENDED! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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