Two Long Jokes

[Sailor Girl]

Hey everyone. I'm going to assume people know what Russian Rulette is, and if I make any spelling mistakes, to please forgive them. Because I really do not want to go through these again. First joke: The Affrican and the Russian

An Affrican diplomat was in Russia doing some business. After his business was complete, the Russian diplomat said: "Well sir, I hope you have enjoyed your stay in my country. Here, we have developed a test of courage of sorts. Are you interested?" The Affrican nods. The Russian then goes on to explain Russian Rulette. He pulls out a revolver, and shoots the gun, there's nothing. The Russian does the same, again there's nothing. Later... The Russian now is in affrica. He does his business and meets up with the foreign dignitary he'd met about a year before. "Well sir, you showed me a great time, may I show you a test simmilar to yours?" After the man nodds, the other gentleman is gone for what seems like hours. After returning, he leads the man down a dark hallway, extending for what feels like miles. They end up in a brightly lit chamber. The man is amazed, there are naked beautiful women all around the chamber. "Pick any one of these women, and she will have oral sex with you. no questions asked." "What's so courageous about that?" "One of them's a canibal." Now, I'm getting sick of typing, so i'll reply to this with the second joke, look for it.

[Sailor Girl]

I promised joke number two and forgot about posting it, sorry everyone. Hope you like it.

A well dressed businessman enters a porn shop. He sees the run of the mill items, vibes, cock rings, dildos, you get it. He asks the man behind the counter if he has anything better then what's on display. "Well excuse me, but these items are the highest quality, sir." "No sir,you misunderstand I just married a very horny young wife, and well I travel quite extensively. I need something that won't let her go astray. Forgive me if I've offended you." Without a word, the man brings up an ornately carved box. Flipping the clasp, an ordinary dildo lies on a cushion of velvet inside. The businessman looked puzzled. "Watch, see that door?" Nodding, the owner says, "Vudu penis, that door."." It goes over and starts pounding the door, so hard it begins to splinter the frame. "Vudu penis, return to box." The man and owner haggle, but get a fair price and the businessman brings it home to his little wife.

Days later, the wife is hornier then ever, and her man just left. She decides to take her husband's new gift out for a test drive. "Vudu penis, my pussy!" Then as instructed, it begins to make her cum over, and over. hitting her g spot even. Well after about three or four amazing orgasms in a row, she decides that's enough. There's one problem, she can't get it out of her vagina now. She's forgotten the instructions to get it to stop. Trying to dress, she figures she'll go to the hospital, they know how to fix it. Wile driving, she's still cumming and cumming. There's a cop up ahead and sure enough,he pulls her over. After the standard question of what the hell were you doing, she tries to explain. "Sir, oh god, my husband bought me this vudu penis, oh Jesus, and it's in my pussy and I can't stop it," She shudders again with another on slot. "Vudu penis? My ass!" Replies the cop.

[pappyld04]

OUCHIE! LOL!