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Has Your Spouse Cheated?


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Kat, I am so~so sorry. A big hug for you, and take care of yourself.

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I agree AIN'T NO FUCKING WAY YOU'LL PUT THE BLAME ON ME FOR A LYING, CHEATING, BITCH OR FOR WHAT SHE DOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am in total agreement, Chuck. It cuts both ways.

My Ex's GF left him as soon he moved out of our place. The 'excitement' was gone for her.

Of course, this was hugely entertaining on my part, but I keep my glee to myself. :lol:

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I agree. I don't think in ALL cases BOTH spouses can be held accountable for one spouse cheating. Now, if the marriage is a loveless one, that has little to no communication, and even less affection, then, yes, but, more often that not, in my experience, that's not usually the case.

I know that I do NOT hold myself accountable for when my old BFs cheated, or when my ex husband cheated. It's not "my" dick that was wondering out of bounds, after all.

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A question along these lines but down a different avenue: I have read articles..and i can't quote my source, sorry....some were actually medical articles about counseling--that having an affair can bring a couple closer together in the end, that it highlights areas of the marriage that may need attention...communication verbally and physically. Once these issues are dealt with, the marriage can go on to survive and thrive. I am pretty sure NOTHING could have fixed my last marriage, but has anyone experienced this loss of trust which then turned around and made them closer to their partner??

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A question along these lines but down a different avenue: I have read articles..and i can't quote my source, sorry....some were actually medical articles about counseling--that having an affair can bring a couple closer together in the end, that it highlights areas of the marriage that may need attention...communication verbally and physically. Once these issues are dealt with, the marriage can go on to survive and thrive. I am pretty sure NOTHING could have fixed my last marriage, but has anyone experienced this loss of trust which then turned around and made them closer to their partner??

As a matter of fact yes. I feel closer and more in love with him than ever. Although some days I go through a hard time remembering what happened. He has done everything imaginable to make it right. He tells me he feels like he is falling in love with me all over again, That I am everything to him and that it was the mistake of his life doing what he did. I am still not really certain, what, if anything was lacking in our marriage. But in some ways we took each other for granted. Maybe not in an obvious way but I definitely feel like I need him more than I ever did before. He really sees now that the grass isn't greener with someone else. There was never anything wrong with the wife he has (me) and in fact he now knows that he really has everything and more here with me and with our family. I feel like even though he devastated me with what he did, I could not find a better man. I know I deserve someone who wouldn't do this to me etc. but I want him, it happened and it's over. He wants me more than anything, he is terrified of losing me also. I am sticking by him. I love him completely and I just want him to be with me. I am not completely healed yet. It still feels new to me, the pain is still there but it is getting easier. Like I said before our sex life is better than ever, which really says something because it was always great. It's like we are in that "make up" mode. When we make love I feel so desperate to just be with him. I believe he feels the same way. I literally feel how much he loves me, how sorry he is and that he is trying to make it right. I don't know if I make any sense but that's my feeling on the topic. :)

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. . . I have read articles...that having an affair can bring a couple closer together in the end, . . .has anyone experienced this loss of trust which then turned around and made them closer to their partner??

Not personally. But there was a move, I love you to Death, based on a true tale, of a wife who tried to murder her cheating, womanizing husband. I saw the real-life husband and wife on some talk show. They seemed quite lovey-dovey, and said that the whole experience had brought them closer together.

So I guess it's possible? Of course, no idea if these two are still together.

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