Girl On Top

[veggywitch]

Hey

My boyfriend and I have a good sexlife, I think. We have worked through alot of communication problems and whatnot, but one thing still doesn't seem to click

I can cum from pretty much any position in the book, except ones like 'girl on top' in which I am in control... if I am on top I loose my entire sex drive, it doesnt feel good at all, but he gets tired of being in control and 'doing all the work'

any suggestions on how to ... make it work?

[CGEM]

Hi VW,

A thought occurred to me (doesn't happen that often). Maybe you could try to learn to get comfortable being on top of your man. To me, it sounds like the problem is not about physique i.e. he reaching and touching you in the right spots etc. I would rather guess that you don't feel yourself comfortable in that position with all the control.

Perhaps you should get familiar with being on top without penetration. There's so much you can do on top of him without having him inside you; For instance, you can hug and fondle and caress him. You can rub your crotch against him and his cock. You can take an upright position and show him how sexy you look sitting on top of him, touching and fondling yourself. Or maybe, while in that position, you should show him how you please yourself when you're alone and thinking of him. Do all the tricks sitting there, try seeing yourselves in a mirror if you like to, but get comfortable. Do whatever it takes. Get confortable and aroused. That is a great position for foreplay, too.

And when you feel comfortable, open your lips and take him inside.

While it's important to realise that you're not supposed to do things that feel unconfortable, remember that only your own curiosity is the one and only reason for trying it anyway. And feeling comfortable about yourself is the key - it makes uncomfortable things feel much less so.

Have fun!

[mystofpric]

Veggie~

Here's a question for you: Is your boyfriend a big boy down stairs? Because with woman on top, your more likely to take all of him in, which could lead to discomfort is your beau is a big boy and over filling you. This might make you dread being on top and yeah that would kill your drive. If this is the case when your sliding on stop when it stops getting cmfortable. YOu might get to the point where you can take more and more of him, bt don't rush it for him or anything else, always about YOUR comfort.

Plus girl on top does take a lot more effort from you, you really can get a good leg workout from it, which if you believe that sex should be an easy thing, no strain then this too could add to it. To make the "workout" portion easier you could do a few exercises. I'm not sure how you sit so I'll cover to basic positions:

Kneeling: For when you straddle him while on your knees. Sit somewhere with your knees beneath you and your legs shoulder with apart(wider if you know you have to for your man) and just raise your self up to a full kneel and then lower your self back down to a sick. DO 10 slow, and 10 faster(like you would on top.

Squating: For when you are on top of you man with your legs bent completely and the weight on your feet. Squat down like your on top of you man (legs roughly the same width apart) and then raise up to just bent knees. slowly lower yourself back down. DO you move this much when your on top? Probably not but the larger movement of going to a bent knee is actually easier. SO again 10 slow, then 10 fast. As you get better, raise up a little less.

This is also going to build confidence (and awesome legs) so you'll have to think a little less when your on top. And check out the other recent post about women on top you'll get lots of ideas for different things you can do so you won't have to think as much and you;'ll be able to just go with the flow.

Suzy

[sun_flower969]

Hey

My boyfriend and I have a good sexlife, I think. We have worked through alot of communication problems and whatnot, but one thing still doesn't seem to click

I can cum from pretty much any position in the book, except ones like 'girl on top' in which I am in control... if I am on top I loose my entire sex drive, it doesnt feel good at all, but he gets tired of being in control and 'doing all the work'

any suggestions on how to ... make it work?

I was like that too! I only recently started enjoying this position! I would get on top and not really be able to feel much. I would get tired and we would switch. I think what helped me was (and I always say this) really relaxing and going slow. I found that you do not need to get "height " to enjoy this position. It is all about angle and pressure. Sometimes I lean forward while up there and it works great. Even just sitting on him and grinding back and forth or in a circular motion works as well. You have to practice and find what works for you personally since we are all different! Keep practicing that is the only way! Good luck!!

[SensualWoman]

I have the same problem! The whole "boyfriend doesn't want to do ALL the work ALL the time" thing. But I only get pleasure out of it at certain times. One thing that did help me though, and it's weird, but whenever I had him blindfolded I could enjoy myself more especially when he is tied down. I feel like I can do anything and his senses are a little more sharp because of not being able to see. This is most likely just a self conscience thing... But it's a start at least. Keep trying until you find something that works and have fun learning I say! If that's the only way it can happen then there's nothing more you can really do, whatever the solution.

I'm going to have to try the bullet thing that's for sure though. hehe