torinasia

Oh curvacious , you could noy have said it better, because some dreams are best kept just as dreams. In that way they y can be become fuel... As Eurytmics says "Sweet dreams are made of these, who am I to disagree..." Tor

Hello quiet guy I have to admit that I just love dirty talk and after some practice my wife got in to it too. I guess you can see te topic it from two sides. One is the one that Mikayla talks about " the raw emotion" it is so good to say what you actually feel in the heat of the moment, that can enhance the sexual feeling quite a lot. The other side is that it can be a bit of a role play and in that way explore - what you might call - the darker side of your sexuality. And isn´t that what a deep and sincere sexual relation is about - to exlore your own sides and help your partner to explore hers/his?? And when playing a role, who gets offended? The things I have said to my wife while she has given me blowjobs would probably put me in jail in some countries, lol. But when my wife is told that she is " the best cock-sucking whore in the world" and that her "horny mouth was made for taking my dick real deep" she gets very excited. And when she stands on all four in the bed and in an almost angry voice demand me to "stick it in her wet pussy, fill her up and fuck her like a rag-doll", well I almost cum. So I guess Quiet guy, the thing is to talk to your wife and maybe make a little glossary on what words she just cant stand, what she can stand and of course what she wants you to say. And then just do it. And for God´s sake, dont apologize afterwards. I think that will make the dirty talk a lot more shameful than the dirty talk itself. I totally agree with Howard on that point. As we said before on this site, the brain is the sexiest part of the body. Use it. Tor

First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ! And what would I give you? Well the glass-dildo seems to be a hot, or cold thing, according to Mikayla. Guess you should take her advice, she seems to know whats really good for a woman. Me and my wife, had not tried it but maybe we will. No straitjacket, but why not hand-cuffs- And being the one I am, of course some sexy boots and lingerie. But if it was my wife´s birthday, I would not get too technical. Why not a night on the town ending up in a romantic or maybe sleazy hotel and some workout between the sheets. So if I was to advice your lover, I would say that. Tor

Oh Kayla, you must have been a very good girl last year if Santas brought you all those presents. Thigh high latex boots and blue velvet corset, that sounds incredible sexy. Wow! And with that outfit I guess even a good gilrl becomes a little naughty. And happy New Year, as we here in Hongkong soon will be celebrating the Chinese New Year when we are entering the year of the dog. or maybe the year of the stud, cant remember Tor

Hello I always do wonder about feelings llike that. Isn´t it very much of "The grass is always greener on the other side"? Of course there are people that can start a fire in you in no time at all and, as said here, could push the right buttons. And of course you will always have memories of great sex. But your ex will also have a lot of Monday mornings, headaches and bad days and so on. So I think that the "perfect ex" is often something you make up, a fantazy you need at certain times. Nothing wrong with that, as long as it doesn´t take to much energy of the everyday life. But on the other hand, if your ex is ALWAYS in your mind while making love with your hb, maybe it is not your ex that was so fantastic but more that your present relation is lacking something. Could be tough to find that out, but maybe you have to do it Tor

Hello, good to see the old boot-topic back on track. Thanks Mikayla for the warning about the sheets. Have never had that experience bu of course it can happen. On the other hand you have to do some sacrificies in life... A hot bootfuck at the price of ruined sheets? .. Ok I´ll buy that, And I agree with Crazy1, one could really get the eyes glued to a woman in sexy boots, sometimes it is almost embarressing. My wife newest ones are som real tight-fitting in black suede, kneehigh and stiletto-heels. So sexy, they fit almost like gloves. Thank you Santa... Talking about that, anyone on this forum that got any sexy gifts for X-mas? Please share it with us! Tor

Take it easy, guess perversion is when you get so obsessed that it controls your life. Just getting a kick is the spice of life. I get a lot of kicks like that just alking around on city streets watching women. And I am glad as long as I get that sensation. Cause sooner or later I guess we will all be like the old man in the tale: "still chasing women, but can´t remember why". So enjoy you kicks, personally I prefer the shoes on.... Tor

Hello and a Happy New Year everyone. Back after a short holiday. Well it seems I have discussed this topic with Mikayla and others before, but it is such a nice thing to talk about so here we go again. High heels, preferably on boots Long gloves Lingerie Uniforms Mild spanking and domination Mavbe I am to average, just found out that I "only" scored 383 on the kink test. Am I a bore ? Tor

Hey Crazy, no need to apologize for the length ( who needs to do that,lol). I was just making a friendly comment on the abscence of new paragraphes. Your answer was very well written, as always. Tor

I agree with Crazy, but he need to get him som advice. Why not punch the return key at least once in his novel? Anyway he has a great point there, focusing less on sex can give you more sex. Being a parent is very time-consuming. And I think it is in our DNA, although some radical feministis may call me a male chauvinist pig, that a woman is more for looking after home and family and therefore puts sex in the second room when the household seems to fall to pieces. We men often think the other way, or maybe we think with another head than the one on our shoulders, and think if " If i a feel stressed first thong i need is to get laid to ease the tension" So instead of asking what she could do for you, ask what you can do for her (Almost sounded like JFK: don´t ask what your country can o for you, but ....) If you can ease her everyday burdens she will put sex back in her mind more often. But one thing you can ask of her, I did this with my wife when our kids were really running our lives, is that both of you, maybe especially her, really put sex on your agenda. Like every Wednesday night after nine o´clock or whatever, it is sex-time. (Of course thast does not forbid sex on other days ) No matter if the living-room is untidy or you have to answer some e-mails or the pile of laundry is building up. In to the bedroom and lock the door. That is also good because it builds up some real good hormones under the day. If you know it you start to fantazise, "this night I want to do this and that..". And get some weekends off now and then. Why no to go to a sleazy motel? Those hours could be a real good investment and helps you through the tough work of being parents. Good luck Tor

At first, this seems like an easy question to answer. And of course that answer is NO. Married people, and BTW not only married people but couples going in a steady relationships, should stay together and not cheat. One reason is the moral issue and I guess I am kind of oldfashioned there. No cheating. The other reason is that it seldom works out the way you hope it will. Maybe you say to each other it is OK, we love each other, the other affair is just sex, we are open about that and so on . But that is seldom the truth. Because behind those words there is often someone that gets hurt or feel very awkward. And remember that there are three persons involved, this extra boy- or girlfriend also have feelings. But the life sometimes take tough turns. Say that something dramatic happens in your life, and I am sorry JR, that to me that not just means that your partner still have sex with you but not quite as often as you like , but say that one partner suddenly totally lose the lust or the ability to have sex. But you still love each other, have a long history together, kids and so on. And you still want and need to be together. Should the one with the sexual needs then stay in celibacy forever, doing lonely handjobs? Say that your partner has an accident or stroke or ends up in a wheelchair, paralyzed from the neck and down. And you still love him/her very much and remember what you promised God and the whole world when you married, stick toghetfer for better or worse til death do you depart? The unlucky one in the whhelchair may feel, on top of all other agony,very unhappy that their partner, besides all the sorrow and work taking care, also is denied a sexife? This is kind af a dramtic turn, I know that, but it is just to stress the question. In that case maybe it is the best for both parts if there is a boy- or a girlfriend, or even a "professional help" involved? So like with most things there are very seldom an absolute yes or no. That is what makes life such a challenge. And you need a lot of knowledge before you can judge people. Tor

Ok I am not a woman, but I guess I can give my opinion anyway. I must say that concerning heavy facials I have mixed emotions. My first thought when it comes to question like "Would you like your partner to do this or that for you" is "Would I do that for my partner" And when it comes to the oral part, I love the scent and taste of my wife and I am more than happy to lick up her juice. And she does the same for me, she can really take it deep while I cum. But would I like to be sprayed in my face with sticky cum, if a woman could produce that? I really dont know. And my wife is not that keen on it. Of course it has happened some times, but to say that she loves it, like JR:s flames did and do, would be a lie. But ton the other hand, some caveman in me reacts quite strongly if I see some pornstuff and a really lovely woman gets a load in her face. The feeling seems to skip my brain and go directly to the groin. So maybe there is something deep down in us that like this. Maybe it is all about being confirmed, the woman likes you so much that she wants her pretty face "ruined" by your dripping cum. So you see, I am a bit confused. Therefore I am with Silvia, I want to have some more female comments on this issue. Girls, you have to face it, lol Tor

Oh hi sexy, thanks for those words. Well, long studies and hard work in certain areas give you some skills... Tor

Sure people with a weight problem can be sexy. In my opinion, people feeling sexy in most cases also look sexy. And good self-confidence is also something that can make you sexy. So I guess that is the most important, how you feel, not what you wear, or do not wear. The brain is the sexiest part of the body! But then of course sexy clothes spice things up. And as always a good choice of clothes can to some extent hide what you dont want to show and enhance what you want to show. But that is something women know more about then men. Tor

Ok, to tell you the truth I am sitting now in an all night open internetcafe in Hong Kong, my home town, and I am quite drunk after a night out with the guys. And I just managed to escape from all the Phillipinos hookers here trying to get inside my pants and wallet. So no cheating here!!! But it was a tough ride, can tell you that, they are kind of cute. Anyway just want to make this comment about cheating, of course it is the question about how your partner reacts. You might say that you feel okey with jerking off in front of the computer, chatting with some person. But how would your react if your partner did the same? That what it is really all about. Would I like to get home one afternoon finding my wife, who I love more than everything, violently jerking off to some stranger on the net telling her all kinds of nasty things? Guess not. And if not, how could I do it? Guess that was the conclusion of Miakylas last mail. So feeling horny and drunk, I have to find a taxi and get home, trying to stay clear of all the hookers here in Wan Chai. Wish me goodluck, because I am kind of randy. Could use a good blowjob right now. And I am talking about a blowjob all the way... Tor

What can a man say? Mikayla and Sandra, keep on spreading the message!

Oh Mikayla, you make me seem like a dull boy... Tor

Well Mikayla, I totally agree. And i have my very own experiences about feeling guilty. It was like this: Both me and my wife travel in our work, but my wife stands for 80 percents of the travels. She is often away for a fortnight. That means we have to ease the sexual tensions "on our own" but I am proud to say that I have never had sex IRL with another woman in all our years of marriage. And I am sure wife has not been with another man. But there has been a fair amount of masturbating, phonesex and lately even chatsex between us. But one day I happened to get in to a Yahoo-chat and met this extraordinary woman. She was so hot and sexy, not as all the jerks out there just wanting your creditcardnumber. Anyway, as we chatted along and she gave me so many hot details about her sexllife with her hubby, she suddenly opened her photoalbum for me. And those picture were so hot, not hard-core, but so sexy. And it felt so intimate to see her and she asked me what pics I liked the most and what I would do to her if I was there and so on. And so she suddenly asked me if we could help each other to get off. She was so skilled and wrote such hot things that I sometimes believe that she was actutally a he, because She/he knew so extremly well what would turn a man on. Anyway, I could not say that things got out of hands, because actually my thing got in my hand and yes, I wanked off with one hand on the keyboard. I felt kind of ashamed afterwards, but I was so aroused. It was like being 16 years old again. But I have never told my wife this. And I feel like I was cheating. Maybe because I also have cybersex with my wife from time to time. So there is the line for me. Tor

Now, this interesting. Where do we draw the line? If we draw it to to the extreme, cheating means that when you loook at another person and feel sexually attracted to her/him, well then who is not cheating? But, on the other hand, I agree with the opinion that you can be cheating, even if you dont have sexually physical contact. For lets say that you have another person in mind all the time you have sex with your partner, then you are not honest with your feelings. That is cheating So there is a very big gray-zone here. The thing is that the net has changed so much and given us so many new opportunities. If you talk dirty to a stranger on the net , with no intention of meeting her/him IRL, maybe it is not. Maybe that can spice up your sex life, like looking at an adult movie. But you could do more than that. If you do more than write dirty things to each other, like masturbating together and telling your net-partner what you do and how you feel, is that "over-the-line"? Maybe. And if you use a webcam? Well I would say that that would surely be on "over-the-line"? But guess that there are no clear mroal here. Any comments Tor

Well I guess it is like this female standup-comedian once said: "I dont understand phonesex, because when you finally get the phone inside you, how can you hear anyting?"

Well Howard, little surprised by your outburst, cause guess I said just about the same as you did, although I did not put it in that harsh way. And after all I thought the issue was to give this poor lady some help and hints, not to start WW3 with her partner from day one. And we dont have all the facts, do we? Tor

Ok, hope you dont think I am too rough here, but this guy as to understand that it is f*ing duty to do something more for you in bed. Old fashioned is no excuse, this is 2005, not the age of Mr Flintstone. Talking about self esteem, who could have that and treat a partner like that. But OK, if you are to tough on him, maybe it will spoil everything.Hurt male feelings can be pretty strong. But you have to make him understand a few basic things.... Good luck Tor

The "wont really talk to me about it" is not acceptable!. Not in a million years. If she does not understand what kind of feelings her behaviour stirs up in you, then she has a problem or is just teasing you. Find that out. And dont take "wont really talk to me about it" as an answer. Tor

Ok Telecom, This is a tough deal. Reading your posting, it seems to me that you have kind of reached the end of the road. And in that case, I guess it is like Mikayla says - now it is up tp you, not to her. Judging from what you have told about your struggle you have done more than anyone could ask for. And maybe the sad truth is that she has done what she can. So I guess you have to ask the question about how important sex is. And when you get the answer, go on from there, trying not to blame yourself or her for how your life together will be in the future. But I think it is time you make that move now. Life is not long enough to not make that kind of decision, so waiting is not fair for you or her. But the decision is up to you, guess that no one out here can tell you the answer. Tor