Tyger

I hope you find what you're looking for, and have fun here too!

----- BLIND MAN IN A BIKER BAR A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the server, "Hey, you wanna hear a blond joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair -- given that you're blind -- that you should know five things: 1. The bartender is a blond girl with a baseball bat. 2. The bouncer is a blond girl. 3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blond woman with a black belt in karate. 4. The woman sitting next to me is blond and a professional weightlifter. 5. The lady to your right is blond and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head,and mutters, "No... Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

Oh my!!LMAO Guess that means that Batman and Superman have more than Spidey's back!! LMAO

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was "CRAZY" and give me a few days off. A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked "What are you doing?" I told him I was a light bulb. He said, "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days." I jumped down and walked out of the office. When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her "...And where do you think you're going?" (You're gonna love this.....) She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark."

Well said! Also, please remember, that this IS a message board. So, don't take things "personally". Please don't think that someone's taking the time to "pick on" you or single you out to be mean or disrespectful, unless, of course, they PM you, to which you always have the option to report and block the offending person from your PM's. Please keep an open mind to what people are saying, and try to be respectful as possible. Reread what you write, to make sure that it's coming across as you mean it. There are several times that, when I reread something, I edit it, because it could be taken totally wrong.

I too, have genital herpes. The suppressive therapy, for ME, has bad side effects (bad abdominal cramps, headaches, and such), so I am not on anything. When I do get an outbreak, I use some Super Lysine balm on the sore, which helps heal it faster. My husband is fully aware of my status, and has chosen to take the risks, since we're married and all. He hasn't contracted it, and we've been together over 6 yrs, and I've had active herpes for over 6 yrs (I found out I had it when we first were together, and no, he's not the one that gave it to me). However, we ARE using condoms as a form of birth control at this point. Taking suppressive therapy has shown to decrease the risks of transmition of herpes, though you can still get it even with suppressive therapy. People with genital herpes can "shed", this is when the virus is semi-active, and still be transmitted, even if you don't have an outbreak. Herpes can be passed on to others with no signs of an outbreak (OB's), or even with the use of condoms, but in NO WAY am I saying that you shouldn't use them either. Here are some links to better understand gential herpes for you: Dept. of Health STD Genital Herpes MedHelp site Genital Herpes The Health Book Genital Herpes Never ever engage in any sort of sex, oral, anal, or vaginal, if your lover feels an OB coming on. Remember, no matter what the big claims, there is no cure for herpes, though it is treatable, and the outbreaks generally get less over time. Even if your lover hasn't had an OB in years, they still have it. It never goes away. Just be careful.

Glad to read that you're trying to spice things up! That's great! As far as toys go, sometimes it take several to find one or 2 that you/your lover really likes. A toy newbie, may not know what to expect, and so the feelings may feel "wierd" at first. You know how when you get a new cell phone, electronic, or kitchen gadget? And you use it all the time, getting use to the thing? I recommend that she do that with her newest toy. That way, she can get use to it slowly. Going from no toys to toys is quite a step, and can be a bit unnerving, especially when you don't know what to expect. Once she's use to using toys, THAT'S when bringing in a new one as a surprise can be done confidently. Best wishes!

Having another Impulse toy, I was sooo excited to get this item the other day! Besides being a computer geek, I LOVE my sex toys, so this is the best of both worlds for me! Knowing the “Impulse” line, the “i10” caught my eye. Knowing the number after the “i” means the level of vibes, 10 is a GREAT number! Then, the next feature that caught my eye was NO BATTERIES NEEDED!! Very cool! Then, 2, count ‘em 2 different stimulators? Oh yeah! We have the extra long 56” USB cord, the finger mini massager, that resembles the top of a pocket rocket type toy with snug, adjustable finger braces, and a small, narrow bullet. And the controller that can be taken for a cool mini mouse! That’s it! No program to install or anything. Having the need to try this baby out, I plug in the USB cord in my handy-dandy front USB port (with 56”, it doesn’t matter if you have a front or back USB port open, you should have plenty of cord), attach the 2-button controller, and plug in the bullet first. Yeah, baby! We have lots of options here, from vibrating, to surge, and pulsating, all at different strengths. When I turned it on, I did notice that no indicator popped up on my screen, telling me that a new piece of hardware was installed or recognized, helping keep the privacy down on my computer (though it’s MY computer, so I don’t care, but it’s nice to know). The bullet is a little loud, even when undercover, but it really does very well on pleasing my desire for strong vibes! And the finger mini massager has the same options with more direct stimulation, which is just what this gal LOVES. So now, if I’m reading another juicy review, or viewing something that really turns me on, I can plug in and get my e-gasm….I mean ORGASM on! Get satisfi-E-d

Indeed, I don't ever remember reading in the Bible "thou shalt not recieve/give a blow job".

Well, all the men that I've been with like nipple play, but I tend to not only lick, but nibble, nip, and sometimes quickly bite, keeping them guessing, on their toes, and anticipating what I may do. LOL But, as was already mentioned, every man is different. What one may like, another may not.

But, thanks all for letting me rant, and thanks for all of the support, it really means a lot to me.

We were thinking the same thing. Thankfully (?) I'm home most of the time, so she can't do it during the daytime. Plus, even though my PITA neighbors bug me, they'd let me know if they saw someone messing with our property. Something good about nosey neighbors!! LOL I'm sure she also remembers that we have a dog that hates her, and that we also have guns, No Trespassing signs, and the balls to back all that up. I have NO problem opening up the door and telling our dog to "get 'em", and she would too! So, I DARE her to come up our driveway. My FIL lives the next street over, so I think it's also convenient for her to make the circle, and be nosey all at the same time. Thankfully, our trees are a bit more up our property, and are bigger, so a big effort would have to made for her to TP OUR trees!! LMAO She lives over an hour away, and keeps moving, so we have no clue WHERE she lives, and I wouldn't waste the gas or TP on her ass. She's just not worth it. Plus, where we live is where her and BIL use to live, and if you remember, this place was TRASHED when we bought it, so having her drive by and see how good this place is looking NOW, is payback enough for me!!

Welcome to the forum, and I hope you're able to get some fresh and fun ideas from here!

Seems as though my ex SIL has struck again. Yesterday, my FIL called us and asked if we had gotten "wrapped". Not being the degenerate that I should've been I guess, I had no clue what that meant. Apparently, my FIL's house, cars, and trees had about 9 rolls worth of TP thrown all over them. Then, yesterday, we watched our ex SIL drive by the house a total of 9 times (that we saw). She lives over an hour away, so all this is a bit too coincidental. It's been a year and a half since their split, and almost a year for their divorce. She's been acting crazy ever since. Stalking her ex (my BIL), lying, being very rude, making up allegations of abuse, withholding the kids, stupid and practicing LOADS of defirmation of characters to all of us. I told her off over a year ago, so I don't care what she says. However, when there's a possible vandalization (is that even a word?) of my property, or people I care about get hit with stupid shit, well, let's say it fries my ass. She's over 30, so this sort of behavior is ridiculous to me. Of course, we can't know 100% that she did this. And, there's not much that can be done for Getting Wrapped. I mean, there really was no harm done, just a PITA to clean up for them. And the embarassment, but still!! Why can't people just let things go, and move on? I mean, they have kids. I know she doesn't keep her mouth shut in front of them, cuz she never did when they were together (he was just as bad). BIL is working on getting stuff straightened out, however, he's lazy, and has a new baby with someone else, so I don't know how actively he's pursing all of this. I've always been a bit more mature for my age, and I learned a long time ago that keeping all the negativity going doesn't help anyone. It happened, learn from it, and MOVE ON! Anyway, thanks for letting me rant.

Fluff, fold, and fuh-fuh-flutter!! How cute!!

Rub-a-dub-dub, this one you’re gonna love! Astroglide has many great products, and this one is a great addition to their product line! I love having a variety of lubes on hand, to add a little spice to our "lube menu", and so I was thrilled to get this one to try out too! Made with only 4 ingredients (propylene glycol, glycerin, purified water, and methylparaben), Astroglide keeps this new product relatively simple & still easy to use. This is a clear, water-based lube, so it’s safe to use with all sorts of toys too (silicone based products don’t absorb into the skin, so they don’t make good massaging products). You get a full 7 oz with this bottle, as well as a flip-top cap, with a small hole, similar to what you get on a baby oil bottle. Very handy and easy to control the amount you get out of the bottle, it also comes with a safety seal at the top, for quality and sanitary purposes. I got this stuff and told my hubby that he HAD to give me a massage (for quality control purposes only, of course). He obliged. He applied this product to my back and shoulders, and I did notice a warming feeling right off the bat. Perfect for those aching muscles! As he rubbed and kneaded my knots away, he said that this didn’t feel sticky, and kept its slickness rather well. After the massage, we move to the bedroom, where we start doing a bit more intense rubbing. I was a little shocked when he started rubbing my labia, and I could immediately feel the warmth of the lotion STILL. He hadn’t reapplied for a while. That was NOT unpleasant either. As a lubricant, it held up rather well too. After our first application, we didn’t have to reapply, which is always a plus. And the nice warm sensations were wonderful inside and out. After we were all done, I was able to come back down from O Land, and realized that the lotion had absorbed into my skin, leaving it nice and soft, not sticky or tacky. Always great! Yes, this one will get a lot of usage! Great for a treat, romantic night, or just as a staple, this 2-in1 is a must! Rub me tender, Warm me up.....

Beat me? LOL I have a leather whip, but I come with it.

Fantasies are great, but, if you're not attracted to your GF anymore, then you should do both of you a favor and split. And, as one with sisters, do NOT go try and date the other one. Sleeping with one sister, then trying for the other, not a good combo for the sisters, and you may end up with a lot more drama than one person needs.

First off, iha basically said that, the older a woman gets, the chances of her hymen is fully there go down. Especially if that woman is physically active. I seem to remember you saying you wanted to go out for some dance team, so you obviously do a lot of bending & stretching, so you hymen probably wasn't fully there when you started masturbating. If you put a toy in all the way (assuming it's longer than 4") then your hymen isn't there anymore. If it's a narrow toy, it may just be slipping thru the hymen's opening, hence the pressure. Read the articles on the G-spot, and the feelings you get when you hit it. Yes, it can feel like you have to pee, and if you've emptied your bladder before hand, then the liquid that comes out is actually fluid triggered by your g-spot.

AWESOME!! Glad you liked it, and it came exactly as advertised!!! I love how discreet they really are.

Another thing, about the whole "sex is a chore" comment. I forgot to add in on that too. LOL I am a dork, what can I say? Anyway, if you have your own place, then, there really should be no reason why all your "sexual aides" including condoms, wipes, lubes, whatever, can't be right at your arm's reach. Even if you DON'T have your own place, you can always find places to keep that stuff. Like in the top drawer of your nightstand. Or, if your bureau is next to your bed, sacrifice a drawer for that. It shouldn't take long to pop all that stuff out, or, just pull out the drawer, and have it all there. If you're really organized, in a deeper drawer, you could put small baskets in them, and then have lubes in one basket, condoms another, and so on. Why go on an "Easter egg hunt" before each sexual encounter. Or, you can keep that stuff in a basket right up on the top of your nightstand, and if you have company, stow it away somewhere. It shouldn't be so much work to make fun in the bedroom. It's good that you're clean and responsible though, and that should never be looked down on.

OK, well, you said that you're inexperienced, and your BF wants more sex. Just because you're 18 doesn't MEAN that you will crave sex all the time! It depends on several things, as to how much you'll want sex. I'm not trying to sound insulting to your BF, I'm just throwing out what I'm getting a sense of. Women that have started having sex sometimes take a bit to get use to it. Not only the feelings of newness of a more "womanly feeling", but the sensations, and some women have a hard time letting GO fully. Just because you loose your virginity to a guy, doesn't mean you fully trust them. You had the added issues of having a medical reason to be a bit fearful of sex, even after you had your surgery, and that is sure to affect you. Plus, wanting sex means that you're able to orgasm, and that you have an ATTENTIVE & good/great lover. If he's only thinking about his nut (which, frankly, it sounds like he's pretty selfish), then he's not spending a lot of time on you. You've proven to be a "harder" gal to get off, so he's not going to bother, since it's too long. You said that sex feels "GOOD". Honey, great sex feels GREAT, EXPLOSIVE, TINGLY, awesome. Not just "GOOD". The better the sex/lover, the more you're going to want it. Many young women, myself included, when they first have sex, feel as though they need to really make their guys feel GREAT about their dick's abilities, and don't bother really FEELING what's really happening. Women are "wired" to make other's feel good about themselves. Almost like a mothering instinct. It's great to be supportive and positive, but, lemme tell you, that it's a disservice to your own self to not really LEARN how to have great sex!!! It took me almost 4 years to find a lover that really cared about ME, my needs, and desires. He was also 5 yrs older than I was. More mature than the other guys I'd been with previously. He sounds like he's very selfish to me. Commenting on how his past lovers were, and how you compare to them is extremely rude and inconsiderate. I mean, nobody really likes being compared to past lovers, and why he keeps doing it is stupid and insensitive. If he wanted a girl with tons of experience, he should've never slept with a virgin. Women that are virgins, usually know almost nothing as far as actual sex acts are manipulated, and are rarely so comfortable, that they're instant great lovers! It takes time, and people should be constantly learning about sex, what pleases them, and their current lovers. THAT'S another thing!!! What may turn one of his exes on, may not another girl! I mean, everyone's different. For example, some women LOVE to have their nipples bit hard, nibbled, or some don't like nipple play at all. You also sound like you have a lot on your plate right now, meaning you have a lot of responsibilities and things you wish to accomplish. There's NOTHING wrong with that. It may take you a bit longer to get in the mindset of having sex. Some women take a lot longer to be able to let go than others. If you don't get turned on by him touching you, and you're relying on a lot of physical reactions to get turned on, then DING DING DING, you may be right on the money when you said that you may not be attracted to him anymore. Those sorts of things can't be forced. Him being demanding, selfish, and immature of your needs is a big turn off in anyone's book. I hope that all these responses have helped. I didn't respond right away cuz I wanted to really thing about how I wanted to say all this. I hope you find happiness!

If I'm remembering you correctly, you lost your virginity to your BF, right? I don't think it's "more exciting" sex he wants, just adding a little fun to it is more likely what he wants. There are lots of things to try, from using ice in your mouth while giving him a BJ, to giving an erotic massage, to learning different positions. Have sex in every room and possible surface in the house (if you're able too). There are thousands of possibilites, positions, and things to try when having sex! Remember, being adventurous, and willing to try new things is what makes great lovers. Don't just say NO WAY because it's an odd thought. Try it, you may like it!

If I'm remembering you correctly, you lost your virginity to your BF, right? I don't think it's "more exciting" sex he wants, just adding a little fun to it is more likely what he wants. There are lots of things to try, from using ice in your mouth while giving him a BJ, to giving an erotic massage, to learning different positions. Have sex in every room and possible surface in the house (if you're able too). There are thousands of possibilites, positions, and things to try when having sex! Remember, being adventurous, and willing to try new things is what makes great lovers. Don't just say NO WAY because it's an odd thought. Try it, you may like it!