Hi everyone,
I have been married for several years and have vaginismus (involuntary contracting of the vaginal muscles). This is something that I have had since the beginning of my sex life. It has very much improved but there is still ways to go.
I have been thinking about it a lot lately as my libido has been WAY up (uncomfortably up...). My husband and I do have intercourse but no orgasms for me yet, so it really does help take the edge off. We are on a weird place in our marriage and I am trying to find ways to improve our relationship and our sex life.
Because of my condition I had to take the lead about everything: when we do it, how we do it, what we do, etc... Over the years, I feel like I involuntarily "tamed" my husband. He does not take any more initiatives. He used to be very passionate and very much into giving me the most pleasure possible. Now that sex is back on the table (we couldn't for a while because the vaginismus made it impossible during my depression) I would like to start having him take the lead.
Anyways, how would a woman start to be a bit more submissive ? I do think that if I learn to let him take the lead it will help with the vaginismus and would result in more pleasure for me. But I have no clue how to do that. Any ideas?