hdbtwnurlegs

I thought I should jump in on this thread, share our experience and add my two-cents worth on this topic. Back then, we would agree that this was the best decision we'd ever made. Back in the days when we were still having sex, my wife did not like the taste of my cum, so I tried the fruit and vegetables routine, but that didn’t really help very much. For a totally different reason, we decided that I should have a vasectomy, and that cured the taste problem as well. So, if you and your wife no longer have the desire to have any more kids, you might want to discuss that with her and give it consideration. If you go to: http://www dot vasectomy-information dot com you and your DW can find out everything you’ll need to help with the decision of whether or not to have the ‘snip’. In the Features/Personal Experiences/Personal Stories section you'll find all kinds of descriptions of how those who've done it feel about it. Our story is posted there; the webmaster's summary says: LEE Added July 27, 2002 Lee's story is written 23 years after his vasectomy. He had his vasectomy before he got married. Both he and his wife to be had medical problems, so he had a vasectomy and they ultimately adopted a child. He concludes: - "The FREEDOM of worry allowed us to grow and glow together and become one-flesh. In our early married years we were able to explore and experience all the joys and pleasures of our sexuality without fear of pregnancy. It allowed us to get to know and experience each other more fully, at any hour of any day, at any time of the month. This spontaneity brought us together more than any other aspect of our wonderful relationship." Our full story (see:<http://www dot vasectomy-information dot com/stories/lee.htm>) describes in detail the benefits and the degree of discomfort (not much) I experienced. It is an easy procedure, and in comparison to the cost of BCP's over my wife’s reproductive lifetime, is relatively inexpensive. In our case, insurance paid for it, so I really can't say anything about the expense, and since it was 28 years ago, costs then would be irrelevant today. We decided to have a V before we got married. That may sound strange to some, but for us, it was easy; we were both in our late 30's, had lived together for quite a while at that time, and our desire for children was zero. I am a type 1 diabetic since age 4, and we didn't want any accidental offspring to have the experiences I had growing up with the disease. My wife would have required surgery to correct fallopian tube problems and was having problems with the pill, so making birth control my responsibility was easy. (Three years later we changed our minds about children, so we adopted our son.) I had a scalpel based vasectomy. It was done on a Tuesday morning at the Doctor's office (he was the head of the Urology Department at UCLA, so was very knowledgeable) and I experienced minimal discomfort during the procedure. The procedure took about an hour, and I 'rested' in the Dr.s office for another hour before driving home. I drove myself to and from the Dr's. office, and by the time I got home, I was feeling a bit of discomfort in my scrotum; it felt like my testicles had swelled somewhat. I used a bag of frozen peas on my scrotum to ease the discomfort, watched TV and slept most of the day and went to work the next morning, still with a bit of discomfort, but not enough to keep me from being productive. I took a semen sample to the Dr's. office Friday morning and since it tested free of sperm, we resumed our sexual life that evening, the following morning, and several times during that first weekend. It had to be the best decision of our lives! I admit my scrotum and testicles were still somewhat sore, but not enough to keep us from doing what we wanted to do that weekend, and with each ejaculation, the soreness eased so that by the end of the weekend, there was no discomfort at all. The FREEDOM of worry allowed us to grow and glow together and truly become "one-flesh." In our early married years we were able to explore and experience all the joys and pleasures of our sexuality without fear of pregnancy. It allowed us to get to know and experience each other more fully, at any hour of any day, at any time of the month. This spontaneity brought us together more than any other aspect of our wonderful relationship. Lee

Here are the stories of several women who report their experiences with cut vs. un-cut penises. Not all of the 12 stories are contained in this posting because the book's website does not provide the complete book, just exerpts. 'Sorry to post so much material, but this is a topic I feel very strongly about, and my wife, who is 1/2 Jewish, does too, because she's had personal experience with it. But as they say, YMMV (Your Milage May Vary for those who are not familiar with the acronym Chapter 7: 12 WOMEN TELL THEIR PERSONAL STORIES Many of the questions in the survey asked respondents for comments. Some women commented extensively and talked about their life experiences. In each of the twelve narratives that follow, I took the composite comments (and some answers to survey questions) of each woman and strung them into a story format. Some editing was necessary to make the story flow, but the thoughts were not changed. It is important to note that, in the introduction to the survey, I instructed the reader that I would use the term natural when referring to the uncircumcised penis. This was done to prevent confusion between the two terms, circumcised and un- circumcised, since the question format was comparative, going back and forth between the two types of penises. Many respondents picked up on this term — natural — and used it in their comments. They also picked up on the terms natural intercourse, circumcised intercourse, bang and pound away, and other words used in the questionnaire. Story # 1 I really had deep feelings for my circumcised lover. He treated me fantastically and said he adored me, but I began to dread sex with him because it was so frustrating. His penis took longer to become erect, seemed drier, and was more difficult to thrust in and out. He had to work very hard to bring himself to orgasm, and he sometimes worried about pain on his penis. It took away from the spontaneity. He had a strong sex drive and sometimes I felt used. I just did it because I liked his company. My current natural husband is a sweet and wonderful lover. I’m very lucky to have him. I think the natural penis is more alive. My natural husband seems to get an erection easier, can maintain it longer, and I think his orgasms are stronger. I love the subtle feel of his foreskin as it moves along the shaft of his penis as we’re making love, it’s kind of like a massage. You’re right about the natural penis jiggling in short strokes bringing more pleasure to the clitoris — I never thought about that before! What a realization. My natural partner and I actually joke about his “wiggling.” My fantasies are always about natural men. My first lover was natural. The foreskin can be lots of fun to play with. Our son is also natural. Although I was afraid of going against the “norm,” I think he will someday thank me. Story # 2 I have had a lot of different partners, but it was many years ago and my memories are rather faint. However, overall I did prefer the natural penis, and I would have liked to have married a natural man — but nobody asked me. Twelve years ago when I had my natural experience, I did achieve my personal record of having intercourse nine times in a night. I could feel the skin moving freely over the penis and also enjoyed the lubrication. I do enjoy sex with my circumcised husband, mostly because he concentrates a lot on my pleasure, but as soon as the penetration starts, the fun part is over for me. When our son was born, I insisted that he not be circumcised. I was thinking of his future wife! Story # 3 I can’t argue with the assumption that a natural man makes the best lover. I have had intercourse with 38 circumcised men. I discovered how to bring myself to orgasm during intercourse with circumcised men. Then I slept with a natural man and had superb vaginal orgasms. I went back and slept with three circumcised men, then I went back to get more amazing natural sex. In my experience, the natural man moves with a consistent rhythm that I find pleasing, whereas the circumcised man’s movements are not in harmony with what I like. With the natural man, I emit more juices, but with circumcised men, I often had to make use of artificial lubricants. Although foreplay was equally arousing with both types, with circumcised intercourse, too many times it was just two sets of genitals banging away at each other, detached. With my natural partner, I am a much more active participant. My natural man feels much more satisfying. His thrusts stimulate the inside and outside of my vagina [vulva]. I have vaginal orgasms every time we have sex. I have never had as many orgasms with a circumcised man as I do with my natural man — mind-blowing orgasms — which I never experienced with a circumcised man. Besides, my natural partner just physically feels better. My sexual experience with my natural partner has been erotic and fulfilling. He is just more sensitive to my needs. To me a natural penis is a work of art, solid and erotic. My natural man is a much better lover than any other man I’ve ever had. He’s yummy. We enjoy long, luscious, passionate lovemaking — but that may, of course, just be him. [Author’s Note: This last statement points up the quandary some survey respondents had about attributing their good sexual success to the penis itself. But considering that this woman had intercourse with 38 circumcised men and only one natural man, what are the odds that out of 39 men, she found only one man to be superior and he just happened to be natural?] On your survey question about natural men using shorter thrusts that gently grind against the woman’s clitoral area and the circumcised man using long thrusts that result in less physical contact — very true. I thought I was the only one who felt that way. Story # 4 My husband is circumcised and we have been married 14 years. He believes he has lost much of his sensitivity and I can tell. He often needs to work pretty hard to reach ejaculation. Fortunately, we still have a satisfying sex life because he’s very in tune with my feelings, physically and emotionally, and is careful not to hurt me, but I know other women who have problems with men thrusting too hard. I suspect that circumcised men experience a loss of sensitivity in their penis and perhaps this is what causes their need to pound away. This reduced sensitivity makes them have to concentrate more on their own penis and how it feels, sometimes forgetting their lover. Natural men seem less likely to do that. I’ve made love with only two natural men and both were very sensuous, their thrusting very loving and gentle. Never did those men pound away like some circumcised men. I enjoyed the feel of the natural penis. With one natural man, I believe I could feel his foreskin moving inside me. I seemed to be wetter too. Interestingly, one of the natural men I had sex with had a rather small penis, so size proved to be unimportant to me. However, the fact that he was not circumcised did make a difference. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a natural man, but I still remember the difference, and I like that feeling. Story # 5 A good love life including sexual intercourse is a very important part of my life. One of the reasons I divorced my circumcised husband was my unhappiness with our sex life. He was totally engrossed in satisfying his own sexual needs and seemed preoccupied and frustrated, which frustrated me. He pounded and banged as if he were having intercourse with a non-feeling person. It was so rare to have intercourse that lasted with my circumcised husband. I felt a deep sadness because I was usually just getting interested and he was finished. He would tell me to roll over and go to sleep, and I would quietly cry myself to sleep lacking sexual satisfaction. I never remember feeling like a whole woman during our marriage. He was very interested in pornographic magazines, reading them almost daily during the last years of our marriage. At the beginning of our marriage, we had intercourse about once a week. It gradually came to the point where we had it once a month. With my current natural husband, I’ve finally found a man who enjoys lovemaking and intercourse as much as I do, and as we get longer into the sex act, I get more and more into it. He truly satisfies me and makes me feel like a whole woman. The natural men I’ve known have been more patient and affectionate and have spent more time and effort to enable me to have an orgasm. My other two natural partners were both from Europe. My Russian partner was the most gentle man. Intercourse was so rhythmic — it was like dancing gracefully together. We were so in tune with one another, I felt like we became one. I experienced a titillating feeling in my whole body — a pleasant, satisfying experience that I had only dreamed of before. Story # 6 Natural intercourse is better. There is no comparison. When I am in the mood, I have no trouble becoming aroused with either, but none of my 14 circumcised partners lasted long enough so I was usually left hanging, which angered and frustrated me, and I suppose this ultimately affected my ability to derive any pleasure from subsequent sessions. My natural lover (I am presently having an affair) has the ability to “hold back” (most of the time) for as long as it takes me to reach orgasm. My husband, who is circumcised, seems oblivious to my feelings, and this causes a great deal of anger and resentment on my part and creates a distance between us. He makes me feel like a prostitute, and I often tell him to leave my money on the bureau when he is through. Sometimes I talk on the phone or watch TV while my husband is having sex with me. He laughs at this but plows ahead nonetheless. I tell him how cheap and used he makes me feel and how selfish he is, but he never reacts to this, which makes me even angrier. This has been an ongoing issue in my marriage for the past four years and caused many arguments, hurt feelings, etc. The stress I have experienced from this situation also carried over into all other areas of my life as well. It has destroyed what little self-esteem I had and has caused me to seek gratification elsewhere. With my natural partner, I feel happy, and loved. I would attribute this to the fact that my natural partner takes his time and is very gentle and loving. He does not act as if he’s in a race or as though he is an animal in heat like my circumcised partners. I can only enjoy sex if I feel comfortable and relaxed. He makes me feel like I am important, whereas the others made me feel dirty. I experience no pain with natural; it is always pleasurable. With circumcised, I often experienced discomfort. Story # 7 My first experience was with a natural man. He was a wonderful lover, slow and easy. There is a big difference, which I didn’t find out until later when I went from him to four circumcised men and then to my husband who is half circumcised, but I would put him in with a circumcised man’s status. What I’ve found out about the circumcised men I’ve been with is that they have no motivation when it comes to sex. Sad, isn’t it? I think when they cut off the foreskin, they cut away important sex nerves, so maybe sex isn’t really fulfilling for a circumcised man, so he rushes to end it. Natural is longer lasting and more pleasurable. The whole lovemaking experience is more intense. I honestly feel a natural man is more confident about lovemaking and himself. He knows how to please a woman and wants to make her happy not only for his pleasure but for hers too. There isn’t this intense feeling to have it end as there is with circumcised men, who seem to want to end it quick. Circumcised sex is not fulfilling unless you have foreplay. But with a natural man, I didn’t need much, or even any, foreplay to feel wonderful when making love. I look back and wish I could go back to my natural lover of ten years ago, even for a moment. The feeling with him was like going to heaven. With circumcised sex, I feel cheated. I don’t vaginally orgasm with my husband. I have never felt fully complete with any circumcised man. My husband is a good man and I love him, but his lovemaking has to be improved upon. Too bad his parents just didn’t leave his penis alone. Story # 8 I am 40 years old. I have had intercourse with more than 10 circumcised men and 3 natural. All my circumcised relationships were short-term, lasting only a few months at the most. I went through several circumcised partners before achieving my first vaginal orgasm, and even though I am capable of achieving orgasm with a circumcised partner, I find I must work harder to bring it about. As I’ve noted by my responses on your survey, I’ve found circumcised thrusting actions to be rougher and tougher than natural. Circumcised men always, at some point, seem to need to work really hard at thrusting. They back way up and get into these long detached strokes that pound away at my vagina, causing it to tense up. As intercourse progresses, I’ve noticed that my vagina loses lubrication and becomes dry, sore, and irritated. This is when sex becomes uncomfortable, boring, and unproductive, and I start to totally lose interest. But during natural intercourse, the penis always felt so sensuous and comfortable. Our sex organs seemed to swoon passionately and blend into one another. The natural penis thrusting actions were gentle and tender. With my natural partners, my vaginal lubrication increased and I never had vaginal dryness or irritation no matter how long intercourse lasted. I never had a natural man separate his groin from mine for the purpose of thrusting; intercourse always stayed very connected genitally. One of the differences I noticed with the natural penis is a feeling of more tissue. The foreskin backs up and applies additional pressure to the vaginal opening, which I loved. I think that circumcised men are more detached from their penis — as if their penis were a separate “thing” that they use and abuse, rather than it being an integrated part of their total body. Of the three natural men, one was my ex-husband, which wasn’t a good sexual relationship. This had nothing to do with his natural state but with his sexuality in general. The other two natural lovers were very gentle with their penis — the way they fondled it when urinating or dressing, etc. Their penis seemed to be an extension of their overall psyche — and they were quite loving and gentle to this body part that they respected and appreciated. The sexual experiences with these men were extraordinary in the gentleness, sensuality, and mutuality of the experience. As I mentioned a couple of times, I was very in love with these two natural lovers in ways I had not been with other men before. Before taking your survey, I had never given any thought to the differences in the two types of intercourse. But as I progressed through it checking off my responses, I was continually amazed at the dramatic differences the two kinds of experiences brought me. I do think you are on to something here. Your analysis of the style of intercourse with the natural penis was so “right on” it made me feel like my experiences were under observation! I find it all so fascinating and very thought-provoking. I am currently partnerless and am doing the personals — God, do I have to request only non-circumcised men respond? I don’t think I could go back to circumcised sex again. [Author’s note: Fortunately for her, and the other men and women in America, the foreskin restoration revolution has begun.] Story # 10 I remember growing up in the late 1940s when there was only one position — the missionary position. A girl was just expected to let the man take her as she laid on her back. But in the ’60s, I experimented with different sexual positions. I remember the first time I was on top. I was with a natural man, and I still remember the feeling I had in my vagina. It was quite intense. As I rocked back and forth, and all around, the foreskin moved with my rhythm. It was a natural stimulator in its own right. I couldn’t help but to orgasm again and again. With the circumcised penis, this natural stimulator is gone so I don’t get that tremendous feeling. In fact, I never want to be on top with a circumcised man because it does nothing for me. I find when I’m riding a natural man’s penis, for some reason, the flexible skin — or something — makes you crave it more. The penis feels like it belongs inside of you. I’ve never experienced discomfort from natural intercourse. After natural sex, I always feel happy — fresh and alive, like a little girl. I’ve found with natural men, there is less anxiety. You can be on top for a while, then switch to other positions. And he seems to care more about your pleasure than his own. When I’m making love with my natural partner, I feel like we are one! With circumcised men, my experience has been that they often come so quick you rarely get a chance to come yourself. Circumcised men have to be in control or on top because they need to control themselves as best they can, and they pump too hard. In the past, I learned to just be passive and let the circumcised man do his thing. During circumcised intercourse, I feel very little in orgasmic build-up, and afterwards, my vagina is red and sore. Sometimes, I even have to fondle my clitoris with ice cubes. With circumcised men, I feel totally violated, like I’m being used. I’m so glad that I’m now married to a natural partner who fulfills all my sexual needs and fantasies. Story # 11 Throughout my early sexual years, all my partners, except one, were natural because in Europe very few men are circumcised. In my late 20s, I came to the United States, met my husband, who is circumcised, and got married. At first, I couldn’t figure out why I didn’t really like to have intercourse with him that much. Finally, I realized that it had to do with his circumcision. My husband, however, does not believe me that there is a difference between a circumcised and natural penis, other than the way it looks. We have been married for almost five years now. Intercourse with my circumcised husband is all right, but I know it could be much nicer if he had not been circumcised. I can’t change that about my husband. I sometimes feel sad for him not having the chance to experience sex and intercourse with a natural penis. He does not see a problem with it. And I don’t want to hurt his feelings by telling him that I really wish he was not circumcised so sex would be much better for both of us. He will never know the difference. During my very first intercourse with a circumcised man, I noticed it was different right from the beginning. Foreplay is great and I am always excited at the beginning, but intercourse is not much fun with a circumcised man. With a natural man, even if I wasn’t in the mood for sex, when I felt that sensuous penis inside me, I would get swept away with passion. A circumcised penis is very dry. But when a natural man gets an erection, glands produce a silky fluid and that fluid makes it easy to move the foreskin layer back and forth, which makes the penis feel very smooth when it moves inside me. Natural intercourse creates more fluids and that makes intercourse more comfortable. I have only had a few experiences where intercourse with a circumcised man lasted longer than 6-8 minutes, and I did not like it that much because I got so dry inside. Also, a circumcised penis feels harder during intercourse. Sex with a circumcised man is not nearly as good as with a natural man. The natural penis is a much nicer feeling for a woman! INTRODUCTION TO STORY # 12 The thesis of this book is that nature equips every male with a foreskin to enhance the sexual pleasure and satisfaction of both partners, and that most women who have experienced both natural and circumcised intercourse can discern several differences between the two types. The concepts presented in this book are disruptive to the status quo and, initially, some people may not want to hear its message. Consequently, this book may generate more than its fair share of critics, who may try to discredit its information by claiming that only a person educated in sexology is qualified to make the claims I make for the natural penis, and then only after conducting scientifically documented clinical studies. In response to the above, I offer the following story, written by my very first survey respondent. When I wrote the survey, I knew that I could discern several differences between the two types of penises and the overall intercourse experience, but I wasn’t sure other women would notice these differences and be able to express them in words. When I received this woman’s survey back, I was amazed — she hit the nail right on the head. This woman, of simple education, was able to figure out on her own, without a doctorate in sexology and a staff of researchers, that intercourse with a natural penis is more satisfying to a woman than a circumcised penis, and she was able to describe the differences with sincere simplicity. Story # 12 My opinion of circumcised sex is that it is not very satisfying to me. Circumcised men try so hard to come, and the stroke of their penis feels so dry and undesirable it sometimes starts to feel like instruments that are used in a pelvic exam, unlubricated. I feel very threatened when they try too hard, and it gets painful. Some of my experience was with a long-lasting relationship partner, but it didn’t feel like it. Sometimes it seemed like a one-night stand. About 70 percent of my circumcised men had problems keeping their erections. I used to think it was because of me, until I learned better. I never had an orgasm with my circumcised partners. I used to get aggravated with circumcised men. And it made me feel so mad because 98 percent of the time it was no type of excitement at all for me, just something we would do and he gets all the pleasure, and I just lie there with my legs open. Sex with my natural man is very satisfying and enjoyable. His penis seems rounder and fuller, plus it’s more gentle. Circumcised men have a tendency to be really rough and unpleasurable, but the natural is really smooth and pleasurable when making love. I never had a vaginal orgasm until I met my natural man, and it was so satisfying that I’ve been with him ever since. But I can’t just finger one thing that makes me aroused because there are so many ways. I like a long-lasting, satisfying love session and the foreskin gives long-lasting pleasure. My natural man lets me have at least three intense orgasms and sometimes I’ll have four orgasms during a 45-minute love session — that’s when the pleasure is so good it sends chills up my spine. I feel so soothed and relaxed that my heavy, but quiet, ooh, oohs, turn my man on even more. When I had sex with a circumcised man, I felt a desire to hurt him for not being satisfied. But with my natural man, I feel a desire to kiss and caress him throughout the session. My opinion is that when me and my natural man have sex, it’s so satisfying to the both of us there are no complaints afterwards. I always praise my natural man on the way he makes love to me. And I always express the sensation and pleasure about the natural man to my friends. The foreskin feels so good and pure, and just the feeling of it going in nice and easy is a very pleasurable experience to a woman. But you can’t really explain it. It’s something I think every woman should try, just to see that the natural man is really worth the while and the time. I’m really glad that you want to share these feelings with the world, because I really thought I was the only one in the world who felt this way. (Author’s comment: Bear in mind that these women had the vantage point of having had sex with both types of men; therefore, their comments may appear more critical than one might expect from the average American woman who has only experienced circumcised sex. This is also true of the comments from women appearing throughout the book. Once one has experienced the difference, one becomes more discerning and may therefore be less tolerant of the circumcised experience. At some point in the book, it might strike you that circumcised sex couldn’t be as bad as women’s comments reflect. But keep in mind that our attitudes are influenced by the plethora of magazine articles, splashed weekly in the headlines at the grocery checkout stand, portraying women as insatiable sex kittens, perpetuating the myth that all is well and that the only problem is, we can’t get enough of it. But truth be told, in the dark and quiet of America’s bedrooms, women are secretly dissatisfied with circumcised sex, but just don’t know what’s wrong.)

The author of the book provides her personal experience as follows: There is also another chapter providing personal stories of other women that I will post in a separate reply. So, all I can say is several women have different experiences than yours. Chapter Eleven: AUTHOR'S PERSONAL STORY I grew up in the sexually repressed ’50s when society dictated that a woman should save herself for the man she’d marry and be a virgin on her wedding night. It was considered trampy and morally wrong to have sex before marriage. And if you did — so you were told — the guy would immediately lose respect for you and talk to all the other guys about you behind your back. A girl really worried about getting a “bad reputation” in those days. Neighborhoods were more of a close-knit community back then, and if a girl slept with someone, she felt certain that everyone would know about it the next day. Gossip was the neighborhood pastime. In the mid-’60s, “the pill” came onto the scene to free a woman from the fear of unwanted pregnancy. This kicked off the beginning of the sexual revolution, and sexual mores relaxed considerably. It was just about that time that I fell madly in love with Tom, a married man who was one of my co-workers. To make a long story short, we began an affair that lasted for three years, and lingered on intermittently for another 12. In retrospect, I feel guilty for having intruded on another woman’s territory. But at the time, I was young, naive, and much too much in love to comprehend the reprehensibility of my behavior. And this is not a justification, but if I hadn’t had that affair, I wouldn’t be writing this book, because Tom had a natural penis, and the men of any consequence who came into my life after him did not. I saw Tom once a week, and during the time I was involved with him, I also got involved with another man named Mike. Mike was circumcised. I was about 25 at the time, and like most women of that age, I was hoping to find a great guy to marry and settle down with. In the back of my mind, I realized that my relationship with Tom, the married man, was a dead-end street. I was hoping that Mike could fill his shoes. Mike lived some distance away, so I only saw him on Wednesday nights and weekends. On average, I was having sex with Tom once a week and twice a week with Mike. It was probably because I was having sex with two different men within a short period of time that I was impacted by the vast difference in both the intercourse experience and my general attitude toward these two men. With Tom, the natural man, sex was passionate, gentle, softly-smooth, and sensuous — all the wonderful things a woman dreams it should be. When we had sex, I truly wanted it to go on forever and would beg him for more, more, more. Too much was never enough. He knew the exact thrusting rhythms to use, bringing me to indescribable heights of passion and pleasure. Every cell of my body became filled with desire and ecstasy when we touched. I eagerly anticipated our next rendezvous and constantly daydreamed about his sweet, sexy, splendid lovemaking. In comparison, sex with Mike, the circumcised man, was considerably less pleasurable. His penis felt much too hard and his thrusting actions were uncomfortably bang-away. Our sexual thrusting rhythms were completely out of sync and I always had to tell him, “Please don’t do it that way — do it this way.” This frustrated me to no end because he didn’t seem to be able to get it right no matter how many times I mentioned it — what was naturally pleasing for him wasn’t naturally pleasing for me. We were obviously having two separate experiences, his and mine. It definitely lacked a feeling of unison. Sex seemed to be narrowly focused in the genital area, and although my youthful hormones gave me a healthy sex drive, still, I was always glad to get the sexual session over with. I seemed to desire sex with him only to satisfy my own inner craving for sex itself, rather than a desire to experience him. Sex with him had a wide-awake, on-alert edge to it and an awareness of my genitals being completely separate from his. The one thing that stands out most in my mind about circumcised intercourse is its complete lack of connectedness — like I was just using his penis as a masturbating object without being emotionally and physically connected to the penis and the person on the other side of it. My vagina seemed to have the attitude, “Let’s have our orgasms and get this over with.” But in contrast, when I had sex with Tom, the feeling was dreamy, ecstatically relaxed — both sets of genitals melted into one another — there was no feeling of separateness; I didn’t know where my genitals ended and my partner’s began — we were one — it was an experience of mutual pleasuring, each giving and receiving, receiving and giving, simultaneously. My sexual attitude toward Tom was in sharp contrast to my attitude toward Mike. With Tom, I just couldn’t get enough, absolutely couldn’t get enough of him, but with Mike I seemed to be able to take it or leave it — driven only by my innate need for sex itself. There was no daydreaming of our next rendezvous. In fact, many times I said to myself, “I hope he doesn’t want sex when I see him tonight.” But if Tom could have miraculously appeared instead, it would have been just the opposite; I wouldn’t have been able to get him into bed fast enough. I was always very uninhibited when it came to sex — I had absolutely no hang-ups — I wanted to derive as much pleasure as possible. During natural sex, I would surrender myself completely to the pleasure of the moment. But during circumcised sex, I never felt like I totally surrendered to my partner. I was never truly enraptured. I was aware of pleasure and lack of pleasure simultaneously, never going over the edge, never able to truly abandon myself in unbounded passion. At the time, I had no idea that the difference in my sexual attitude toward Mike was related to his surgically altered penis. I thought it was because I was in love with Tom, and not in love with Mike. It simply never occurred to me that it could be the penis, not the man. My relationship with Mike lasted about a year. During the next two years, I continued to see Tom on a once-a-week basis, while at the same time, I had several short-term involvements with mostly circumcised, but also two uncircumcised men. At some point, I began to vaguely realize that I enjoyed sex much more with men who were natural, and I remember remarking to a female friend that I thought there was a difference. But it didn’t strike me, profoundly, on a conscious level, that there was actually something about circumcised intercourse that I didn’t quite like. At the time, being young and full of passion, I more or less thought I enjoyed myself during circumcised sex, and I’m sure my partners thought I did, but in retrospect, I found it simultaneously annoying — it had an unpleasant edge to it — even though I would have categorized it overall as pleasurable. It’s a very difficult thing to explain. Sex is so overpoweringly pleasurable it’s hard to conceive that it could strike one as both pleasurable and bothersome at the same time. The following anecdote from an article that appeared in Glamour magazine may help me to make my point: Sharon, a 30-year-old concert violinist, fell in love with Kevin when she was 23. Wanting to please him, she read as many books as she could find about sexual technique. “I felt like everyone in the world knew what to do in bed except me,” she says. “He was six years older and much more experienced than I was at the time — I thought he wouldn’t consider me a good lover. Well, I made up for that! I must have suggested three different positions every night.” Despite the athleticism of their lovemaking, Kevin suspected something was wrong, and over dinner one evening he asked Sharon point-blank if she enjoyed having sex with him. “I was embarrassed, even angry,” she remembers, “but I surprised myself by saying, no, I didn’t” (1). I think that in the above scenario, if the truth were to be known, the circumcised penis is the real culprit behind Sharon’s dissatisfaction. I’ve spoken with many women personally (women who have experienced only circumcised sex) and virtually all of them could identify with the concept that sex can be both pleasurable and simultaneously aggravating. As mentioned, however, some women may not consciously discern displeasure during the act, especially if a woman has never experienced natural intercourse as a comparison; the displeasures of circumcised sex may be below her level of conscious awareness. She may simply get caught up in whatever pleasure she is experiencing and make the best of it. Yet, in the back of her mind, she may be quite dissatisfied, like Sharon, in the above anecdote. At the end of the third year of my affair with Tom, I met my future husband, Jeff. I was instantly attracted to his kind, gentle personality, his intelligence, and his philosophy of life. I had never met anyone quite as wonderful, warm, and genuine. I realized that if my relationship with Jeff was to ever get off the ground, I would have to stop seeing Tom, though I was still painfully in love with him. After a concerted effort, I was finally able to break away from Tom (who was no longer my co-worker), and Jeff and I began to see each other steadily. I developed a genuine, deep affection for him and wanted it to blossom into the kind of love I knew was possible. I grew to love him for the wonderful human being that he is, but I didn’t fall as deeply in love with him as I had with Tom. I blamed it on the fact that I was still nursing the wounds of my previous love affair. I didn’t realize that Jeff’s surgically altered circumcised penis was a factor in the depth of our love relationship. Sex with Jeff was good, and he was a caring, considerate lover, but it wasn’t great. It didn’t lift me to the overwhelming heights of passion and pleasure I had experienced with Tom. I enjoyed sex with Jeff, but I didn’t swooningly love it the way I had with Tom. I continued to blame the difference on the fact that deep down I was still in love with my old flame. I was sure that with time I would fall more in love with Jeff and that that would bring new meaning to our sexual relationship. About a year after Jeff and I met, we got an apartment together, and a year after that we got married in a simple, but beautiful, outdoor ceremony. It was the happiest day of my life. But something happened on our honeymoon that jolted me back to reality. We spent our honeymoon canoeing the Saco River in Maine, and at every bend of the river he wanted to have sex again. It suddenly struck me, profoundly, that I had just made a permanent commitment to him, and although he was the greatest person I had ever met, if I was going to be completely honest with myself, there was something about his sexing that I didn’t quite like. It just wasn’t the same as it had been with Tom — something was fundamentally wrong. I tried to put it out of my mind. After all, I would never meet a more wonderful person, and sex with him wasn’t that bad; it just wasn’t quite right — it was somehow strangely frustrating even though I always achieved vaginal orgasm. After the first year of marriage we settled into a twice-a-week schedule. Although sex with Jeff was enjoyable, and he was a kind, considerate lover who tried to please me in every way and did not “bang away” at my genitals like Mike, still, his penis felt too hard, I didn’t like his long thrusts, and my vagina didn’t “melt” and “purr” like it had with Tom. I must emphasize that I probably would not have had these thoughts, to such a degree, if my vagina hadn’t been “spoiled” by the softly-stiff characteristics of the natural penis; I would have thought that the sex Jeff and I were having was “normal,” not knowing any better. Yet, I was never truly lifted to overwhelming heights of ecstasy and passion. It always seemed like we were having two separate experiences and that that feeling of sexual oneness was somewhere out of reach. It lacked a feeling of true connected-ness, like I was taking, instead of giving and receiving simultaneously. There was always a frenzied concentration toward achieving orgasm without being truly excited throughout the experience because I had to simultaneously block out those aspects that the vagina considered bothersome and annoying. There was an unpleasant edge to it when he was actively thrusting. In order to enjoy it, I had to limit his long thrusts by pulling him in close with my legs. His instinct was to pull away and use long strokes. It was always a struggle. Even though I usually achieved multiple vaginal orgasms using the face-to-face, side-by-side position (see Appendix A), they weren’t truly satisfying. They had an edge of frustration to them in the build-up. They provided physical relief, but it was an “on-the-surface” relief, not deep, not connected to the depths of my inner being. It was more like a masturbatory experience rather than a union of pleasuring. And my mental attitude after sex seemed to be, “Well, we got that out of the way — that should hold me for a few days.” Yet I knew that my attitude really should have been — “Boy, I can’t wait until the next time we have sex.” Why such a difference? It made me wonder. As time went by and I began to comprehend the meaning of the word “forever” — that I was going to live the rest of my life with him — I began to resent, more and more, his inability to give me the kind of sexing I intensely craved and fantasized about. I became increasingly irritable toward him and started quarrels over little, meaningless things. I didn’t realize that the frustration I was experiencing between the sheets, due to the inadequacies and displeasurements of circumcised sex, was being carried far beyond the bedroom door into our everyday relationship. His surgically altered penis was inhibiting us from developing a meaningful love bond. A few years into the marriage, I began seeing Tom again. I couldn’t help myself — I absolutely could not resist him. And I still hadn’t resolved my love for him. He was a magnet, and I was steel. I really wanted to remain faithful to my husband, and I wanted the marriage to work out, but the memories of the moments and hours I shared with Tom were irrepressible. I loved everything about him — the way he walked, the way he talked, his smile, his laugh, his moments of pensiveness, his very touch, his kiss. And the way the light sparkled in his eyes when he spoke — I swear I could hear the angels sing. But in actuality, was he really that great? How much power did the penis wield over my adorations — and how much of it was the man? In all honesty, a little of both, for this was truly an exceptional man. But would I have thought him so charming if he had been circumcised? I’m certain that I would not have. I would have been sexually dissatisfied with him and would be bitching and complaining about him, just like the other two men in this story. And the affair would have been short-lived. Instead, I remained head over heels in love with him. After renewing our affair, we saw each other five or six times over a couple of years, then we drifted apart for a few years. But the memory of his lovemaking crowded my thoughts and filled my dreams. Meanwhile, the relationship with my husband was strained, but for the most part civil. We got along, probably as well as most circumcised couples do, but our relationship was deficient in sexual love. I loved him for the good, gentle person that he is, and we enjoyed each other’s company. But our love lacked depth — the kind of depth that exists when a couple has a deeply satisfying, exquisitely delicious, sensuous, sexual inter-connectedness. Although we were still having sex about once a week, it was encumbered by the problems previously discussed. I learned to endure the way things were, but I longed for so much more. About eight years into the marriage, Tom and I renewed our affair again, and we saw each other two or three times a year for a couple of years. Sex with him was always totally enrapturing — incredibly luscious — sensuously thrilling. Beyond description. No wonder I couldn’t stay away from him. His natural lovemaking had me spellbound. During our rendezvous, I couldn’t help but notice that his penis felt much more sensuous inside me; it felt infinitely better, deliciously better, indescribably better. Entirely different from the sex I was experiencing with my husband Jeff. In characterizing the differences, now that I have thought about this in-depth, I would say that the circumcised experience is like being repeatedly penetrated in an annoying way, even though simultaneously there is pleasure. And the penis feels too hard, almost foreign-like — you want it, but don’t want it, at the same time, driven onward only in hopes of achieving orgasm, the sooner the better. Whereas with natural, the vagina totally surrenders to the soft sensuousness of lingering ecstasy, as it hungrily caresses and lovingly responds to the erotic movements of the softly-stiff penis, and the penis adores and gently strokes the vagina in return. Like two halves of a perfect whole, each organ swoons and sighs to a passionate intermingling and sexual connectedness — the way it was meant to be. With no holding back, lost in voluptuous abandon, you TOTALLY want it, you TOTALLY need it, and you TOTALLY love it. At some point, I began to vaguely suspect that Jeff’s circumcision might have something to do with why his penis felt completely different from Tom’s, and that circumcision might have something to do with our waning sexual desire for one another (by this time we were having sex only once or twice a month). It was just starting to seep into my consciousness that circumcision was the culprit. Even though I had remarked to a female friend about ten years earlier that I thought there was a difference between the uncircumcised (having not yet thought of it as natural) and circumcised experience, I had somehow totally repressed it after that time. It was just beginning to strike me on a profound level that it was the penis itself. About ten years into the marriage, I began to notice considerable vaginal discomfort after Jeff and I had sex. My vaginal cavity would ache with discomfort and pain for about an hour after intercourse, even though we used an artificial lubricant. (I was probably more cognizant of discomfort than the average woman is because we always had our sex in the morning or afternoon, whereas most couples usually have it at bedtime. I’m sure many women experience discomfort after sex, but because they fall off to sleep soon afterwards, they are not conscious that the sensation lingers, and by morning, it may be completely gone.) Then, from out of nowhere, I developed vaginismus — a condition where the vaginal muscles clamp up tight, making penis entry virtually impossible. From that point on, every time Jeff and I would try to have sex my vagina would not cooperate, even though he would try to loosen up my vagina with circular motions of his inserted fingers. The vagina would accept his fingers, but would only accept his penis after 5-15 minutes of forced entry. After entry, intercourse was quite discomforting; I could only tolerate an extremely minimal amount of thrusting, and after sex was over my vaginal cavity would ache with pain for several hours. I began to increasingly sense that my condition was somehow related to his surgically altered circumcised penis. Although various explanations have been proposed regarding the cause of vaginismus (molestation during childhood, rape experience, under-developed genitalia, anxiety, frigidity, etc.), I would like to propose a new explanation. I submit that many, perhaps most, cases of vaginismus are an involuntary vaginal reflex reaction related to repeated exposures to the circumcised penis, which traumatizes and assaults the woman’s vaginal entrance and walls with its hardness, friction, and scraping action. With time, the vagina begins to recognize and “remember” the abuse it is receiving. Over time, it takes its toll, and the woman may suddenly develop spontaneous vaginismus. Although it seems to happen “overnight,” it may actually develop gradually. Long before a woman has full-blown vaginismus, she may notice that her vagina feels abnormally tightened and tensed during intercourse. The vaginal muscles respond autonomically by recoiling and tensing up in response to the physical trauma it is receiving. As time goes by, the vaginal opening becomes tighter and more resistant to penetration. This condition should be considered mild vaginismus, or sub-clinical vaginismus. Eventually, it may develop into full-blown vaginismus, at which time the man will find penetration increasingly difficult, if not impossible. Even if full-blown vaginismus never develops, the abnormally tightened vaginal walls and entrance should not be considered a normal condition. How quickly a woman develops full-blown vaginismus from sub-clinical vaginismus will depend on several factors — her age, how much exposure she has had to the circumcised intercourse experience, how frequently she has intercourse, how long intercourse lasts, the degree of lubrication, how tightly her partner is circumcised, and how vigorously he thrusts during intercourse. After I developed vaginismus and suspected more and more that the circumcised penis was at fault, I became curious to see if the natural penis could “undo” my vaginismus. To check out my theory I called Tom, whom I hadn’t seen for some time. A few days later we met for lunch and then went to a motel. I told him nothing about my vaginismus, having decided that the best resolve was to simply let nature take its course. Much to my surprise and delight, when his penis head approached the vaginal opening, the vagina gave a split-second wince and then accepted his penis easily and willingly. Incredibly, the vaginal opening could somehow tell the difference between Tom’s natural penis head and Jeff’s circumcised penis head. We then proceeded to have a lengthy, heavenly intercourse. Afterward, there was no vaginal discomfort or pain; instead, there was a pleasantly pulsating afterglow throughout my entire genital area, just like I had experienced with him before. That experience was enough to convince me that the circumcised penis was the cause of my vaginismus. I mentioned to my husband, briefly, that I thought circumcision might be at the root of our sexual problems, but I didn’t think there was a solution, so I didn’t press the issue. Not long after that, Jeff inadvertently came across an article on foreskin restoration. I was incredibly excited about it. We had a long talk about everything, including Tom, and I persuaded him to get surgically restored. I was certain that it would cure my vaginismus and make a 180-degree difference in our sex life, and that this in turn would add new depth to our love relationship. After his operation healed, we attempted intercourse. My vagina did not instantly accept his restored penis, but each time we attempted intercourse, intromission got progressively easier and less discomforting. After about four months, we were able to have normal sexual relations — totally fabulous, in fact. I think the reason it took a while for things to normalize was because it required time for his penis head to gradually change from abnormally hard to softly stiff, as a result of the foreskin’s moisturizing effects. As the vaginal opening gradually noticed the difference, it gradually became more accepting of his penis, and ultimately my vaginismus completely corrected itself. (I must stress that for normal sexual relations, it is very important to the woman’s pleasure that the restoring man achieve full coverage, whereby his foreskin extends beyond the glans. This insures that the necessary moisture to maintain the glans softly-stiff characteristics will be present.) I am delighted to say that our love and sexual relationship is now everything I knew it should be — everything I’ve attributed to the natural penis throughout the book — because our relationship has been able to develop its sexual dimension. And we owe it all to the restored penis. After almost 30 years of marriage, we are now more in love than we have ever been, and I feel like a princess in a fairy tale who gets to live happily ever after with the love prince of her dreams. Not only is Jeff the most wonderful man I could ever hope to meet, but his magical, restored penis, with its splendorous lovemaking abilities, takes my breath away, making me fall more in love with him with every passing day, if that’s possible. In my opinion, from the woman’s sexual perspective, the restored penis is virtually equivalent to the natural penis in every respect.* For the circumcised man and his female partner, who are now caught “in between times,” foreskin restoration truly offers a quantum leap in improved sexuality, allowing them to resurrect the sexuality that was stolen from them, and holds the promise for a love relationship to be “born anew.”

\Lori, There is nothing in the Christian "religion" that says anything about sex should not be enjoyed or that sex toys are prohibited. Some preachers, that say negative things about Christian sexuality, have made these pronouncements to maintain male control over religion and to keep women under males' control. All of that stuff is HOGWASH! There is nothing of the sort in the Bible that puts a negative connotation on human sexuality. Read the Song of Songs (Solomon) and see the pleasures a woman gives her lover. If you want to check the validity of what I'm saying, one of the best sites is Liberated Christians - Sex & Sensuality Education For Pleasure, at: http://www.libchrist.com/sexed/contents.html There are several Christian Sexuality discussion groups on MSN, Yahoo and Delphi. Browse through the public postings, or join the groups to ask your questions or read the postings of others with similar concerns. Here are a couple of the Yahoo Groups... There are many: ChristianSexuality http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ChristianSexuality/ A safe place for Spirit-filled Christian believers to openly, candidly, honestly discuss sexuality. This will be a moderated, restricted group so that all members can feel comfortable to talk share our most intimate experiences without fear or intimidation. I am starting this group because I know I often struggle with issues such as what is and is not acceptable in the will of God. I will not restrict what can and cannot be discussed here, but please keep in mind that we are a CHRISTIAN group. sexualitycopingasachristian http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sexualitycopingasachristian/ WELCOME ALL ! Please JOIN us. Life circumstance and age do not matter, we want your input. Sexuality: Coping as a Christian is a great place to be! Just ask some of our members:) I'd say we're a bunch of people who wish to glorify God through ALL of our actions, but we focus here on our sexuality. You know, the butterfly is the symbol of renewal. I learned that from my pastor. My hope is that our society will soon see a sexual renewal glorifying the Lord. Join our club, and join in the movement. There are several on Delphi Forums too: One I belong to is: http://forums.delphiforums.com/libchrist/messages There you will find open, caring ministerial and lay people to answer your questions on Christian sexuality. There have been many who've joined with similar questions as yours, so you may find your answers in some of the more recent messages. Another is Spiritual Sex at: http://forums.delphiforums.com/sexychristians/messages MSN is quite restrictive on their search engine, so you'll have to dig a bit to find the groups that I know are there. Yahoo Groups has several too: But, like MSN, their search engine has become PC, so you'll have to dig a bit, but there are several there. One of the best, in my opinion is: The Marriage Bed The Marriage Bed discussion boards: sex and intimacy from a Christian perspective. NOTE: Some topics can only be read by members of the TMB boards. TMB is at: http://www.themarriagebed.com/boards/ Believe me, you are not alone in your struggle with sexuality and the Christian religion. That's why there are so many places where you can find answers and support as you begin your exploration of God's wonderful gift to us all. Lee