synirr

Good luck!

Woohoo, go Suzy!!! Personally I prefer OKCupid.com to Craigslist, the way the profiles there are designed it allows you to learn a lot more about a person at a glance than you usually can from a Craigslist ad... you know, incase Craigslist doesn't have the guy you're looking for

The cuddling and sharing feelings thing would be nice, but my BF is already like that

Had the colposcopy done and there was no need for a biopsy she said, I just have to go back in 6 months for another PAP

Well, it's certainly not falling on deaf ears here -- I hear you. That said, you asked for opinions and you're getting them I guess?

Honesty, and I say this with all the love I can... I don't think it's falling on deaf ears, I just think the people posting in this thread find the whole idea distasteful. You tried to help their relationship (which is admirable) and found that you are unable, but what you intend to do is going to actively hurt it when she finds out. The blame isn't all on you, he's obviously playing the major role, but you will be aiding him in bringing the relationship down in a particularly painful way for his partner. That's really all there is to it... you can either live with that or you can't, but it's probably useless to attempt to justify it.

In the realm of science, sexual orientation is distinct from sexual behavior... that's all I'm saying. Behavior is often quite different from orientation, and while some scientists will consider behavior as an aspect of overall orientation, doing so has the potential to skew results. I'm with you Suzy, what you described is kinda like a variation on the Kinsey scale, except the Kinsey scale is from 0 to 6 I think the Klein sexual orientation grid is most accurate

HPV, but the BF gave it to me so I guess that's better than getting it from some fling? Haha I actually got an abnormal PAP and am going in tomorrow to have a biopsy and see if anything needs to be done. I'm not too worried... if the dysplasia is bad enough they may have to do laser ablation, but hopefully it'll be mild and I'll just have to be sure to get my yearly PAPs to keep an eye on it.

I think of it as being good for at least 10 years... 10 years from now when it's (possibly) time to get another, we'll know whether or not it's good for 20

I have an issue with the last bit of this statement because it implies that sexual orientation is somewhat based on a person's actions, which is not true. One's sexual orientation has nothing to do with what they have or have not done (think about all the married gay men who come out later, or porn stars who do the gay thing for money,) it's usually defined more by sexual interest and potential for arousal. I figure, if you must label yourself at all, one of the easiest ways is just to ask yourself "am I sexually attracted to the same sex?" and "am I sexually attracted to the opposite sex?" If you're attracted to the opposite sex and your answer to whether or not you're attracted to the same sex is "sometimes" or "I'm not sure," I'd call that bicurious. If it's a definite "yes," you're bisexual. Mine's a definite yes for both, but I have very little experience with women.

I've had this ongoing thing with a guy online for years, we used to exchange pictures and talk almost every night. He lives in Canada and has a family so meeting in person would probably never happen, and now it has simmered down and the romance aspect is gone, but he's still one of the best friends anyone could ask for and I love him to death in a platonic way. When I was with my most recent ex, I had my eye on a coworker, who is my current guy. Nothing beyond flirting ever occured while I was still involved with the ex, but only due to lack of opportunity

Gardasil isn't necessarily only good for 10 years, there's every possibility it's good well beyond that timeframe, it's just that its effectiveness beyond 10 years hasn't been well-studied yet since it is relatively new.

Personally, I think you're officially bisexual when you choose to self-identify as such. I've never been with a woman, but I consider myself bisexual rather than bicurious... I've just had better luck with men is all

I think it's true that I feel very close and intimate with my BF when we talk, but I think a large part of that is that I just enjoy doing things with him... anything! I enjoy sharing experiences with him and then discussing it with him later. I like talking to him about his past, because it helps me form a clearer, more complete picture of the person he is. I think I may be most attracted to him when he's telling me some stupid story about his day, because hearing about him reminds me how much I love him, and that combined with the intimacy really puts me in the mood. I like being reminded of who it is that I'm with.

LOL

Warped but realistic violence. I have no idea why. I really like movies about serial killers.....

You could try to help the guy decide if his current relationship is worth saving, then help him either try to salvage it, or be there for support after they split. That's the ideal of course, but we're not all saints, myself included. If, however, you're asking if it's morally reprehensible, then IMO yes. What's more powerful? Your libido or the potential guilt? That's really the deciding factor.

I'd want to be told, but when it comes to telling someone else they're being cheated on, I'd only tell a good friend... though I'd first threaten to tell as a way to get the cheater to fess up, no matter what the situation. When my BF and I first started dating he was going through a lot of stuff, and he slipped up at a party one night, had too much to drink, and slept with some girl. We weren't an "official" couple, although it was pretty much understood that we weren't sleeping with other people at that point, so I didn't feel justified in being angry, but it hurt a lot. Nothing came of it, and if he hadn't told me I'd have missed out on some heartache, but I'm glad that he did tell me... it was obviously bothering him too, I'm sure he felt bad about it and was probably afraid of losing me. It took a lot of guts for him to face me, and I'm glad that even then he had enough respect for me to tell me.

Thanks Pappy, I tried Just to clarify as well, this situation was never about us sleeping in separate beds... I didn't have a problem with that, and if my parents really wanted it that way it would have been fine. I just wanted my own bed to sleep in rather than sleeping with my mom, which is why I offered to sleep in the trailer. I'm a guest in my parents' house, but do hosts usually ask their guests to share a bed with them, or do they offer all acceptable options and let the guest decide? Exactly.

We didn't have to get a motel, it all boiled down to my mom not wanting to have to discuss it with my dad.

Turns out I was right.... they were being silly. I slept on the couch, and we talked about it this morning when mom woke up and I got to speak to her alone. Apparently she didn't really want to have to discuss it with dad and didn't think to ask me where I'd prefer to sleep, so she just took the easy way out. After I offered to take the trailer tonight if it made her uncomfortable for us to sleep together she said she didn't care if we slept in the same bed, so I finished out my night in the guest room and will be sleeping there tonight Looks like I know my parents pretty well after all... there was no valid reason for the arrangement.

When I think about it, they've actually been doing this bait-and-switch stuff my whole life, which makes it really hard to interact with them because I feel like I never have any clue what they really think or how they will react. Mom's fine with pre-marital sex, she even went with me to get birth control for the first time, so was I wrong to expect she'd be ok with us sleeping in the same bed? Then again, she also loves well-done tattoos, but cried when I showed her mine and asked me why I'd do that to myself. I'm tired of being the exception to every rule and value they have, these things are fine for other people and they always taught me that, but suddenly when I do it it's not ok. This is how I know their rational thinking just cuts off when I'm involved. I am what they made me, so why do they seem so surprised at how I turned out? Maybe some of you didn't mind being treated that way by your parents, or maybe your parents had an excuse like religion, but I'm frankly pretty damn tired of being underestimated and treated like I'm 12 years old, and it's time this stops. This is just the straw that broke the camel's back. I love my parents and I know they love me, but I just can't stand doing this anymore. It has been pretty hard to learn how to be an adult and have confidence in my own judgement with this going on. I've been saving my money, planning for the future, taking care of myself and my freakin' zoo of animals in my apartment all alone, and I bloody well deserve to be treated like an adult for once in my life.

Nope, neither. They're generally very sensible people, which is why this policy caught me off guard. They'd been doing a little better at treating me like an adult lately. They couldn't have made him feel unwelcome if they want me to visit them... we'd have gone right back to Austin. It was nice of him I agree, but what would have been nicer is if they bothered to ask me where I wanted to sleep... I'd have gladly taken the trailer myself. That's what I hate, it's not that I'm an unreasonable person and they should know that by now, so I would have appreciated being asked. It's uncomfortable sleeping with her, I don't want dad to have to be banished to the trailer, and I did sleep on the couch, though that wasn't offered as an option probably because they thought it would make us feel unwelcome. Wasn't expecting it at all, actually. My parents aren't religious or conservative... hell, they never had a marriage ceremony, they just went down to the courthouse for their marriage certificate and I'm certain they were doing the horizontal mambo before that. I talk to my mom about birth control and stuff all the time. I figured they'd realize that letting us use the guest room was the sensible thing. I'm going to offer to take the trailer tonight, but I know if I do Will is going to want to take it instead so I can have the guest room... I just wish anyone could be f*cking sensible.

I'm at my parents' house right now, and my BF is here with me. We're not allowed to sleep in the same bed. I can understand that, he's the first guy I've ever formally introduced to my parents, and certainly the first to stay the night, so I'm sure it's weird for them. The problem is, they don't have two guest rooms, but they apparently don't want either of us to sleep on the couch either, so instead my dad is sleeping in their travel trailer, Will gets the guest room, and I get to sleep in bed with my mother!?!? WTF. The bed is uncomfortable, my mom's dog sleeps in there and snores loudly all night... and oh, did I mention my mom is in there!? They do this any time my grandmother and I are both visiting, but grandmother sleeps in the bed with my mom and I get the guest room, so that's fine with me. I'm honestly just not comfortable with this arrangement, but mom sprung it on me right before bed so there was no time to discuss it away from Will, and I didn't want to involve him... meeting the parents is awkward enough for him as it is, I'm sure. Until then I had just assumed they were going to be rational and we'd both be using the guest room. Am I wrong to be upset about this? I'm 23, I've been seeing Will for over a year, and I would have thought my parents would at least be adult enough to allow me to have a good nights sleep in the house I lived in for 20 years. I'm not unsympathetic, and if they have two guest beds it would be a different story, but lord... this just isn't going to fly.

Honestly, while there is a slight risk, a couple of my friends and coworkers have worked as computer repair technicians, and these people are by and large not out for your personal info. They'd be in a legal shitstorm if they stole your information and were found out, and most of them just honestly don't give a rats ass what you have on your computer... they stare at screens all day long, and they just want to get the job done as quickly as possible. One of my closest friends in high school repaired computers, and he did find some child porn on one once or twice, but he wasn't looking for it, he just happened to run across it in the course of his repairs.