"forgetting about the excitment that leads to that first orgasm, and then working on self control after the " edge " is taken off" not a bad way of putting how it feels after the first, after that you get over that initial single-minded care only for a first erection (how it felt on this end sometimes). "Why would she want you to stop making love simply because you had that first orgasm" one of the reasons we separated, her religious ideas did not prevent us from having sex, instead she would end up stopping us at any point in the fricking road, she would suddenly yell out "no i should not be doing this," then it all would crash down right then and there. few days later we try again, go a bit farther, few orgasms for both of us, really enjoying ourselves and each other, then next minute shes sobbing and wants to run over to the church immediately afterwards. this continued for three months from september to december, off and on like this, she spouted things about me not controlling myself the way she wanted, which in her own words on some days was very religious and on others she could be extremely kinky. Normally I did not know really what she was wanting, she always, and i do mean always, said that i should automatically know exactly what she wanted, and by how much, and without us even doing anything yet. You know there was one time when we would enter into foreplay and be having fun, and move things along nice and slowly, feeling more and more, then i move towards her vagina, and she suddenly curls up and starts to sob and yell at me. and that happened just a week after we had a very fun experience together on one afternoon. some days she demanded that i be a baptist like herself, and that i must be stricter, and other days she would say the opposite. it got pretty hard to adjust often and go with the flow at times with her, her flow was strictly by her terms, and when she wanted to change the speed and if i wasn't doing things the way she wanted it before she even spoke of it, then i was in the wrong so far as she said to me afterwards. it seems from what i just wrote of her, that this is more of a rant, but if there was one malfunction she had, would be her religion. it controlled her in a strange way, on some days she had no problem with us going wild and having fun without a care for fricking anything, and then other days she would start crying just a few minutes into doing anything, and then demand that i suddenly go from being atheist to baptist, and yes demand, "kyle you must go with me to church on sunday, i need you, you have to help me stop having sex so much" but 'so much' was maybe once a week or a bit less than that, actually things got to being routine... well i really do not agree with baptist philosophies most of the time, and with both of us being stubborn as all hell, we broke things up in the first week of december, we both made that decision, working things out, did not work out, and those are myspace messages i will not be showing. now that i read this again it sounds more and more like nothing but an anguished little rant, but yall know what, the situation was that fricking confusing, and i mean, as to your statement about some men thinking of their ladies as nothing more than a conquest, or a whore, yes very true. and guess what, on those days she was not wrapped up in her religion, thats exactly what she said she liked being treated like, did not make sense to me, i did not oblige her in that as she wanted, and when i did oblige her on what she wanted when she spoke of those exact things she wanted, in her words to be treated roughly "since every other guy had done that to her," i did not want to, and know what she would call me? weak, and then say 'i still love you because your skinny' and so she would seemingly resort back into her religion once more when ever i did that because quite frankly, i really do not like thinking about sex logically, she did, i tried to adjust to her and how she thought of it like that! and because i couldn't she would freak out on me, suddenly "i did not understand her at all" her own words. confusing situation that was. now i am going to go back to doing my best to forget about most of that experience and only remember the nice moments we actually we had (non-sexual at that yall)