Try sex coupons...... Make your own up.......if he wants to try them he will cash that coupon in....... Also this is someone you are with, if you don't ask or don't tell he won't know what you like and are willing to do. If you can have sex with him, have him in your most intimate places you should be able to talk to him. Do a class with him on hair pulling., teach what you like.....or make a fantasy jar where you both put in ideas, if your shy about asking for something.