Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 22, 2011 Cleaning Up... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 22, 2011 Not advise but...You can have a LDR forever and some people enjoy the freedom and excitement that brings. In every day life a couple has to fight the monotony at times. I think you really need to think if this women lived in the same town with you 24/7 would you be as inthralled with her? If yes great, that's were the tuff part come in. Which one of you is going to uproot and move? I have a friend who lives here in the states and he met someone in another country who he was completely enamored with. After a year of back and forth, skyping etc... the women finally uprooted and moved here. I'm not exactly sure what has happened since, but I think they are together still. If this is the route the two of you choose, remember it will not be easy for either of you. There will be many adjustments and comprises to make. Just make sure the person who moves will not ever hold that against you. In addition also make sure that the person who is staying doesn't stay in the relationship out of obligation. So many underlying emotions on this one. Good Luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 22, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 22, 2011 Not advise but...You can have a LDR forever and some people enjoy the freedom and excitement that brings. In every day life a couple has to fight the monotony at times. I think you really need to think if this women lived in the same town with you 24/7 would you be as inthralled with her? If yes great, that's were the tuff part come in. Which one of you is going to uproot and move? I have a friend who lives here in the states and he met someone in another country who he was completely enamored with. After a year of back and forth, skyping etc... the women finally uprooted and moved here. I'm not exactly sure what has happened since, but I think they are together still. If this is the route the two of you choose, remember it will not be easy for either of you. There will be many adjustments and comprises to make. Just make sure the person who moves will not ever hold that against you. In addition also make sure that the person who is staying doesn't stay in the relationship out of obligation. So many underlying emotions on this one. Good Luck!Cleaning... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 23, 2011 (*Spelling error noted* )What word would you use to describe if not enthralled? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 26, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 26, 2011 (*Spelling error noted* )What word would you use to describe if not enthralled?I dont know, enthralled just sounds temporary, as if just filling a void. I dont believe Ive ever used "enthralled" when discussing a relationship, but then again i usually never discuss my private life with others, not even those close to me.So maybe it does apply. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ToyQueen Posted December 26, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 26, 2011 All valid points, however "enthralled".... Not a word I would choose, but I understand your meaning. As for who would move, if there was a move, its been addressed, it would be her move. We're both aware of this, there isnt much I could do there as far as employment, unless I retired early, which also has been discussed but not financially practical. As for the 24/7 being with each other, I took 6 weeks off, stayed with her in her city/home, it was good. The only disagreements came when we realized my time was running short and I would be leaving in a short amount of time. And its gotten to the point where she doesnt want to accompany me to the airport when I return home, she tells me she only cries on her way home, alone. So we'll see. I had mentioned somewhere else, its Ironic I seem to be addressing so many topics here on " Too Timid " a Sex Talk Forum, yet I am probably the only one here which is completely Sexless within his/her life...Shameful indeed ! I don't have a lot to say on the subject, but I wanted you to know that you are NOT the only person here who is completely sexless in his/her life. I can't even tell you the last time..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 27, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 I don't have a lot to say on the subject, but I wanted you to know that you are NOT the only person here who is completely sexless in his/her life. I can't even tell you the last time..... You better stock up on those batteries..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 27, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 You better stock up on those batteries.....LMAO, Batteries dont fill the void, not even close, unless you meant for the TV remote... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 27, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 LMAO, Batteries dont fill the void, not even close, unless you meant for the TV remote...Heck, a women has to do what a women has to do..... it may not fill a void, but it full something 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 27, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 Heck, a women has to do what a women has to do..... it may not fill a void, but it full something Im in more need of intimacy, or at least "stuffing" that special someone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 27, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 Im in more need of intimacy, or at least "stuffing" that special someone...I was being flippant however I would think, especially in a long distant relationship, one would need a sexual release more often than they were able to be with their SO. Even in the age of Skyping etc, which is not as intimate, I would think one would have to take care of their own needs. I'm married, live in the same house as my DH and there are times I need to. It is not a substitution for intimacy in any way but I do think it's healthy to love yourself too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 27, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 I was being flippant however I would think, especially in a long distant relationship, one would need a sexual release more often than they were able to be with their SO. Even in the age of Skyping etc, which is not as intimate, I would think one would have to take care of their own needs. I'm married, live in the same house as my DH and there are times I need to. It is not a substitution for intimacy in any way but I do think it's healthy to love yourself too.Honestly, I dont get much satisfaction from self masturbation. It doesnt fulfill my needs, not even close. Maybe its why I am so frustrated of late. Cyber Sex can only do so much, there is a need for physical intimacy with that someone you care for and yearn for.I tend to follow when something is said in Jest, or somewhat sarcastic, but yes, on internet message boards, sometimes the humor or context of the message is lost and mis~interpreted. Even moreso when communicating with the opposite sex, as Men and Women have different ideas what is humorous and what isnt...So it been my understanding (LoL). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 27, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 27, 2011 Honestly, I dont get much satisfaction from self masturbation. It doesnt fulfill my needs, not even close. Maybe its why I am so frustrated of late. Cyber Sex can only do so much, there is a need for physical intimacy with that someone you care for and yearn for.I tend to follow when something is said in Jest, or somewhat sarcastic, but yes, on internet message boards, sometimes the humor or context of the message is lost and mis~interpreted. Even moreso when communicating with the opposite sex, as Men and Women have different ideas what is humorous and what isnt...So it been my understanding (LoL). Again I would agree self pleasuring isn't as satisfying as the intimacy and connection with that special someone. Women are taught, told, etc. to self pleasure to understand what their preferences are sexually so they can be let their partner know and that it is a healthy normal part of adulthood. It surprises me a man might not want/need that release for himself. Interesting, that's all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 28, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Again I would agree self pleasuring isn't as satisfying as the intimacy and connection with that special someone. Women are taught, told, etc. to self pleasure to understand what their preferences are sexually so they can be let their partner know and that it is a healthy normal part of adulthood. It surprises me a man might not want/need that release for himself. Interesting, that's all.Believe Me, I have the NEED! I just dont find satisfaction from self masturbation. But the NEED IS THERE !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 28, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Believe Me, I have the NEED! I just dont find satisfaction from self masturbation. But the NEED IS THERE !!!It's funny, because if my DH has had a particularly difficult busy work week/month I absolutely take care of the need/want. It in no way takes care of the emotional needs I have for intimacy but some of the issue is solved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 28, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 It's funny, because if my DH has had a particularly difficult busy work week/month I absolutely take care of the need/want. It in no way takes care of the emotional needs I have for intimacy but some of the issue is solved.I understand the "quick fix" solution. It just doesnt work with me. Like caffeine headaches, nothing makes the headache dissipate until caffeine is absorbed into the system. I know, a bad analogy, but you get the idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 28, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 I understand the "quick fix" solution. It just doesnt work with me. Like caffeine headaches, nothing makes the headache dissipate until caffeine is absorbed into the system. I know, a bad analogy, but you get the idea.Get it, just shocked by it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 28, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Get it, just shocked by it.Why shocked, not all men sit around and jerk off every day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted December 29, 2011 Members Report Share Posted December 29, 2011 Why shocked, not all men sit around and jerk off every day. R E A L L Y ? ()Seriously, because of the responses I've read right here on this forum, I have been lead to believe most if not all men do masturbate on a regular basis; which in no way has any bearing on how their love life is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted December 29, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted December 29, 2011 R E A L L Y ? ()Seriously, because of the responses I've read right here on this forum, I have been lead to believe most if not all men do masturbate on a regular basis; which in no way has any bearing on how their love life is.I can only speak for myself and by no means am I spokesman for generations of Men. I dont feel sexual gratification of self masturbation, in fact I feel lessened by the ordeal afterwards, knowing this isnt what I need, nor wanted. But yes, I have masturbated, at the urging of my GF as it excites her, even though she knows I dont particularly care for masturbation myself. But seeing her masturbate also excites me, so I reciprocate. As it stands now, I cant even recall the last time. Meaningless, at least to me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Freeagent Posted February 18, 2012 Members Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 I am in the same kind of predicament as Ready is here. Deployed overseas here for another 2.5 months. Also, wife was pregnant when I left. I was home for about 30 days for the birth and 3 weeks afterwards. We had fantastic and awesome sex 4x the two days before the birth. After the birth she was so tired and her hormones were out of sync. My last few days at home she started becoming aroused and back to normal again. Though, she believed what the Drs said and to abstain from penetration for 6 weeks afterwards. Now, the act of physical intimacy and sex is not the only thing I miss, however, THIS IS A SEX RELATED FORUM!!!! I miss the everyday things of life I shared with her back home. Her smile, her eyes, her giggles, the smell of her hair, her cooking, her beautiful passionate-wet kisses!!! The way we cuddle on the couch or in bed. The way her hand feels in the palm of my hand when we hold hands. Her soft wet kisses on my cheek when I am driving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted February 21, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 Now, the act of physical intimacy and sex is not the only thing I miss, however, THIS IS A SEX RELATED FORUM!!!! I miss the everyday things of life I shared with her back home. Her smile, her eyes, her giggles, the smell of her hair, her cooking, her beautiful passionate-wet kisses!!! The way we cuddle on the couch or in bed. The way her hand feels in the palm of my hand when we hold hands. Her soft wet kisses on my cheek when I am driving.I too miss the everyday things which you have listed....As well as a few others, I.e., small talks, knowing looks, Yes, her laughter, and her sexual moans of ecstasy...LDR do have a tendency to take its toll.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ReadyToMoveOn Posted March 24, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted March 24, 2012 So it seems I am at an Impasse...Stale Mate...We talk daily, but because of the distance, talking is not helping Our situation...We've both made promises of commitment, at the same time we both have Our own lives within our own places of origin...Economically, I cannot afford to re locate where she is, I would be out of work...She runs her own business, and though she plans to sell, its not the best of times to be selling anything...Has anyone ever been in a similar situation... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thurisas Posted March 24, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 24, 2012 There was a time, many many moons ago that I used to drive 400 miles or so round trip just to see my then fiancee. Tough on the wallet, tough on the wheels, but ultimately good to continue the relationship(at least until i found out she was a lying cheating no-good dishonest...person). As far as picking up and moving, its a leap and you have to decide whether its worth risking unemployment, underemployment, or employment in a field different than what you want. The thing is, she's there and can help you with leads. As far as he and her business, well, the market is showing signs of lightening up...can you wait a couple of more years until it is stable? Is she willing to make that leap for you? Only you and she can answer those questions. Realize there is nothing wrong with playing it safe either...it just may take you longer to realize your optimal situation.Randy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ToyQueen Posted March 24, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 24, 2012 So it seems I am at an Impasse...Stale Mate...We talk daily, but because of the distance, talking is not helping Our situation...We've both made promises of commitment, at the same time we both have Our own lives within our own places of origin...Economically, I cannot afford to re locate where she is, I would be out of work...She runs her own business, and though she plans to sell, its not the best of times to be selling anything...Has anyone ever been in a similar situation...Ready, I actually am in a very similar situation. This is a man I have spoken with for over 4 years. I have shared experiences with him that I have shared with no one else--ever. But his job requires him to be overseas somewhat frequently, and training elsewhere when he's in the States. I have had the same job for a very long time, and I'm good at what I do. Plus, my kids are almost raised, and I can't uproot them at this time. There are other issues, but I'm not going to list them all here. Right now, today, I would give almost anything to have him walk in my front door. However, I honestly don't know if I will ever see him in this life......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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