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I am 46. I have a mostly healthy lifestyle, and a high sex drive. I am married and attracted to my wife. Our sex life has slowed down over the years, but we have added new things along the way. For ex., masturbation, mutual, dirty talk, porn viewing, anal, telling fantasy. My wife loves that I am sexual.

My 2 probs: 1. I soetimes don't stay rock hard during sex. 2.After I come, I go limp right away. 

Anything I can do?  Will reducing my soloing help? Am I just losing testosterone? I have always wanted to try a Viagra.


Edited by Sdffm3
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Based on a sample size of one (me), I'd suggest soloing too close to the main event should be avoided, but reduction in soloing overall could be detrimental.

But I too would be interested in any other suggestions.

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As men we all slowly decline in the production of testosterone as we age. For most of us it is not a big deal. There are a number of thing we can do to slow the decline by focusing on everything from diet to exercise to sexual activity. If loss of testosterone is a big concern I suggest talking with your physician. If you are experiencing erectile difficulties a talk with your doctor is a good place to start. Once again look at your diet as well. Remember Viagra is a drug with both benefits and possible side effects. A trail may not hurt. As for masturbation, unless you are engaging is solo pleasuring to the point where you have a prefer acne to masturbation over sexual activity with your partner it should have little to no effect on your time with your partner. What can you do that might help? Try Kegal exercises, a clean diet, general exercise, stop worrying about how hard you get and enjoy. Anxiety can be the biggest killer of erection and performance. 

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On 12/18/2016 at 11:23 AM, Sdffm3 said:

Square, why do you say reducing solo would be detrimental?

Cuz if I go longer periods of time between either sex or soloing, when I do go at it again, I have a harder time getting aroused and staying aroused.


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sdffm3 RC is absolutely right, I suffer from E.D. and have for the last 4 years, my E.D is caused by my heart meds. So I do use Viagra from time to time.

Wanting to try Viagra , you need to talk to a doctor because it could make you very ill, there are a lot of side effects associated with it

one thing I tried and my wenwitch and I are very pleased with the results is try a penis pump and cockring  there are a lot of good ones here on tootimid





These are the 2 that I have

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Getting old ain't for sissies..... Ageee with others, go to the Doc!

I sure don't stay hard like I used to. Was a time I would stay hard after cumming, and after a few minutes of desensitizing, could go right back at it. No more!

I also find that I'm not as firm as I once was, but find that if I'm hard enough to get started in her, I get harder as we go.

But....there are lots of other things to do while you wait to get another erection. Oral, and toys! My wife is an oral fan anyway, and became a toy fan. Makes finding something to do while I 'recharge' easy! Good that I like doing oral on her too. 

Not sure about you, but bringing my wife to orgasm, wth a toy or especially by mouth, sure chubs me up!

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On 1/13/2017 at 3:19 PM, TooTimidAmanda said:

Hi Sdffm! 

I'm sorry to hear that you're having those problems, but you're not alone! RCBlue hit the nail on the head with explaining what happens as men age! Firstly, if you're considering Viagra, talk to your doctor! It can have some side effect that you're not aware of! I recommend several things. First would be a penis pump, I8niter has given two great suggestions above! I also have a few:




These are also very, very popular! 

Next, I would say try a enlarging or desensitizing cream! These are very popular:

https://www.tootimid.com/pleasure-balm-desensitizing.html (This will help your stay harder and go longer!)

https://www.tootimid.com/max-size-male-enhancement-cream.html (This will help you maintain your erection, and will temporarily make you thicker and harder)

Lastly, if you want to keep going after you cum, but your member has other ideas, may I suggest a hollow strap-on? A lot of men are hesitant about this idea, because "what if my wife likes it better"? or they feel emasculated and embarassed, but those are made for ENHANCEMENT in the bedroom, to add to the fun, not be a substitute for your real penis. Plus, there are so many different options to choose from! I wouldn't suggest this to everyone, but since you said you and your wife have experimented to keep it fun and exciting, I think these could be perfect for you! They're almost like you're a whole new person, like a threesome without adding an actual third person! You can wear them hard or soft, and they're great for anal or vaginal sex!




https://www.tootimid.com/Fetish-Fantasy-7-Vibrating-Hollow-Strap-On-With-Balls-8792.html (This brand, Pipedream, has a lot of different options, and I think they're really great products)


Definitely give anything (or nothing, I mean, it'll only hurt my feelings a little bit). Let me know what you decide, and how it goes! 



my wife got me a pump for christmas we both love it have rock hard erections again and much bigger give it a try youll both love it wish i had got mine years ago

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