She wants to spice it up....

[IanD33]

Dear reader, 

A few days ago, my partner recommended we do something different to spice up our sex life. We've been together for over 10 years and I felt (I guess she did too) that our sex life needed some change. I was excited to hear her say that, but when I asked what she meant or what she was thinking about she was hesitant to answer. Sounded like she wanted me to propose something. At the moment, I didn't know what to propose because I felt my deepest fantasies (threesome, swinging or cuckolding even) we're a bit too extreme and would scare her away. I know she was exhibitionistic fantasies and sex in public, but I feel that's too extreme as well. So, since this is a forum on relationships and advices, what, if any, are your experiences in the matter and what steps have you taken in your relationships to "spice" things up? Thank you for your input. 

[michelleddd]

Since she didn't really give you any guidelines....... maybe a jumping off point could be a fantasy sharing session so you can see if you're anywhere near what the other person is thinking. Then let you're imagination go wild.    Personally I like to take charge and surprise him with a scenario and he has to cooperate, no complaints.

[RC4BLUE]

I have to agree with Michelleddd, a good starting point is to share fantasies. Talk about what turns both of you on. Maybe find a piece of erotica to share that fits your fantasies and then talk about it. Maybe look at some toys together or go to a shop and shop for toys together. Be playful and fun. If semi public sex is a turn on for her try going to a hotel and get a balcony room with a half wall on the balcony so not everything is visible but there is enough to be exciting. 

[big39steve]

well seeing she has a little exhibitionist side means something else, she is also a voyeur id bet. 

how about taking a  ride somewhere, halfway suggest she lays back and play. you could even prepare bring a favorite toy.   

my wife is very conservative sexually. we had a couple drinks left the bartender was the sort she is attracted to and i knew it. so suggested she play around. and play she did, wow awesome she was completely  into it, kept saying she needed a dick in her. that wasnt something we could do, i said i know of a sex shop nearby, want a big dildo? resounding yes, we stopped got her a good thick 8" and some lube her pants were back off in a flash i inserted it in the parking lot (with number of other stores) then got in and left well she came in record time and had about 8 more before we got back. 

go camping at 9 at night or so suggest a walk, you will hear people screwing away, i bet this will light her on fire also.

[Amy D]

I had a guy tell me that once.  It didn't end well.  As long as the spice you are adding is something between just you and your partner, that is great.

[Mark7even]

On 9/29/2019 at 11:18 AM, Amy D said:

I had a guy tell me that once.  It didn't end well.  As long as the spice you are adding is something between just you and your partner, that is great.

I totally agree with you Amy D it usually does not end well.

[Kinky Twinkie]