Dont Know What To Do!

[lucky7inches]

ok first off i'm new here but i thought i would give asking you guys a chance since every other person i talk to just tells me that i'm shallow. anyways i have been dating this girl for about a year and a half, and we love each other very much. I myself have this problem of loving big breast i cant help but think about them all the time, and i dated a girl who i believed had the perfect D cup breast but i had to break up with her bc we werent right for each other. well i miss those breast and miss the feeling of touching full figured breasts. I dont want to say anything to my gf about her breast which arent too bad (B cups), but i also want this feeling to go away. will this ever go away? or do i need to be with someone with big breast? thanks

[MysticLady]

First off like howard said: GROW UP!

Be happy that your girlfriend puts up with your sorry behind. You are in a relationship where you "love each other", isn't that enough. If you keep acting this way, your girl should dump your loser ass and get someone better.

Liesl aka Pissed off female !

[Tyger]

First off, welcome to the forum.

You sure opened yourself up to a lot of criticism and ridicule with your question. But I will tell you that it took guts to do. I'm going to try to keep your age and gender in mind, since males mature slower than females do, and please take this in a "nice" way. I'm not trying to insult you here.

OK, I noticed that you're 21 yr old. And such, you are going to be prone to being a bit on the immature side. But, at the same time, people can't really help what kind of person they're attracted to, physically and mentally.

You say you love your GF. Then why should breast size really matter? You were attracted enough to her to hit on her, get together with her, and stay with her. You've been with a big-breasted woman, and for reasons that had NOTHING to do with her breasts, you broke up. Try to keep that in mind. A lasting relationship is based on how each person feels for each other, how they treat each other, and love, as well as physical attraction. Like a penis, breasts can't think, talk, or give opinions. It's the person those body parts are connected to that truly matter.

Even though you didn't say anything about this in your post, I would say to you that DO NOT EVER suggest to ANY woman that you're with, for them to get a breast job. THAT would be selfish and shallow. NO person should get any sort of body modification for someone else, only for their own personal enjoyment, pleasure, and self-esteem. Any person that does that just to keep a man/woman is truly in a sad state of mind.

Yes, you enjoy big breasts. So does my hubby. I am not "big breasted" nor am I small. I understand that he is going to look at women that have bigger boobs than I do. That's all part of being human. Just because you're in a committed relationship doesn't mean you're dead and not want to look at other people. If your girlfriend and you are having troubles, it's probably not due to her smaller breasts, but something emotional or mental that's the trouble.

Remember, a lot of the time, we are wanting to have stuff that we don't have. That's also a part of fantasies.

Good luck to you.

[nosleepnmesa]

Well let me say this to start, Welcome to Tootimid. I will agree with Tyger here that it took guts to open yourself up critisim and ridicle. This is of course just my opinion on the situtation. To me it sounds as if you only love her for conditional reasons, in a sense. I mean LOVE is a UNCONDINATIONAL thing. If you are just going to be sooo obcessed with breasts then you are in for a really hard life. I mean they say love can be blind, blind to the size of a womens butt, blind to the size of her breast, blind to alot of things that are well perfect.

As Tyger already stated, something attracted you to her, you knew before you hit on her that she didn't have big breast. I think Tyger put it very well stated. I honestly believe that with the question you asked as if you should be with a big breasted women or not ? That question alone noone can answer for you. I will tell you though that if that is all your looking for in a relationship then yes and with that you will have nothing but a shallow physical thing. A relationship should be something that is fullfilling in all ways, I am not saying that you should be happy all the time, all relationships have their ups and downs but a real one will find a way to discuss it etc.

I believe that your age has alot to do with this way of thinking on your part. I am also hoping that you don't take that the wrong way. I mean women mature faster then men and you being so young you in my opinion are looking for one thing, big breast. I honestly think you need to take a hard look at yourself, you said you love your new girl etc, then take a look in the mirror, and ask yourself this. Does she make you happy? Do you have great communication? Does she make you laugh? Are you attracted to her? What do you really want in a relationship? Well let me say this are you willing to go threw life with conditions or expectations on breast, and maybe miss out on a chance of a life time relationship.

Okay I think I am done rambling on and on. Tyger put it great.

Good Luck and I wish you the best.

[Mikayla1]

Believe it or not, I am not of the same thinking as my board mates. I think if you have a thing for large breasts then you have a thing for large breasts! I mean, we all have those things we are really, really attracted to in the opposite (or same) sex and sometimes it is something we can't overlook. There are men out there who only date super thin women, blondes, Asian women...etc. THere are women who won't date men who are balding, fat or don't have money. What is different about this?

I also think that at 21 you are fully aware of what you like and dislike, so I do not think that age has one thing to do with this. As we get older do we decide that we don't want as much, change our standards? I know that I won't.

I also do not think that you have a "mommy" fetish as Howard suggests. Just because HIS mom had big breasts doesn't mean that every man whose mother was well endowed craves that large breasted woman!

I have large breasts, 40DD in fact. I DO NOT have the issues finding clothes, getting bras, etc that Howard suggests. I LOVE, LOVE my bit breasts and so does my hubby and HIS MOM is extremely small chested, as is his sister and every other woman in his family. He just loves big tits!

Well, while I DO support your desire to be with a bigger breasted woman - I would point out 2 things. First, you couldn't have known that this feeling of inadequacy would surface until you got intimate with your current girlfriend. So, while you probably were attracted to something in her, her physical deficiency is on your mind. I am very confident that if you were 100% satisfied and happy with your current gf that you would overlook the breast issue - there must be something else lacking.

Second, I do agree with Howard on looks NOT being the only criteria in a relationship. I mean, there is more to a woman than her breasts - and while I love my big ones, I do hate when men stare at them and not at me -but I can understand it. What you have to decide is if you can be as attracted to this woman as you were your big breasted ex - if you can't, then clearly you have to move on - I mean, preference is preference. I wouldn't want a man to date me who kept thinking, "your tits are too big" I would want a man who loved all of me...

Good Luck!

Mikayla

[MysticLady]

Believe it or not, I am not of the same thinking as my board mates. I think if you have a thing for large breasts then you have a thing for large breasts! I mean, we all have those things we are really, really attracted to in the opposite (or same) sex and sometimes it is something we can't overlook. There are men out there who only date super thin women, blondes, Asian women...etc. THere are women who won't date men who are balding, fat or don't have money. What is different about this?

I also think that at 21 you are fully aware of what you like and dislike, so I do not think that age has one thing to do with this. As we get older do we decide that we don't want as much, change our standards? I know that I won't.

I also do not think that you have a "mommy" fetish as Howard suggests. Just because HIS mom had big breasts doesn't mean that every man whose mother was well endowed craves that large breasted woman!

I have large breasts, 40DD in fact. I DO NOT have the issues finding clothes, getting bras, etc that Howard suggests. I LOVE, LOVE my bit breasts and so does my hubby and HIS MOM is extremely small chested, as is his sister and every other woman in his family. He just loves big tits!

Well, while I DO support your desire to be with a bigger breasted woman - I would point out 2 things. First, you couldn't have known that this feeling of inadequacy would surface until you got intimate with your current girlfriend. So, while you probably were attracted to something in her, her physical deficiency is on your mind. I am very confident that if you were 100% satisfied and happy with your current gf that you would overlook the breast issue - there must be something else lacking.

Second, I do agree with Howard on looks NOT being the only criteria in a relationship. I mean, there is more to a woman than her breasts - and while I love my big ones, I do hate when men stare at them and not at me -but I can understand it. What you have to decide is if you can be as attracted to this woman as you were your big breasted ex - if you can't, then clearly you have to move on - I mean, preference is preference. I wouldn't want a man to date me who kept thinking, "your tits are too big" I would want a man who loved all of me...

Good Luck!

Mikayla

You can find bras your size??? Where do you buy them?

Liesl

[lucky7inches]

thanks for your help guys.. i have done a lot of looking at myself lately and you all are right my gf is perfect and the only thing i could find wrong with her was this... thats very selfish of me thinking the way i have!

[nevabelle]

thanks for your help guys.. i have done a lot of looking at myself lately and you all are right my gf is perfect and the only thing i could find wrong with her was this... thats very selfish of me thinking the way i have!

im glad you changed your mind

but even if you hadnt

being physically attracted to your lover is very important and maybe something you should consider next time you start a new relationship.

[tdriskel]

thanks for your help guys.. i have done a lot of looking at myself lately and you all are right my gf is perfect and the only thing i could find wrong with her was this... thats very selfish of me thinking the way i have!

I am so glad that you are thinking through all of this stuff. I can see both Howard and Mikayla's points. I really grooved on tall guys with dark hair and blue eyes in high school. My husband isn't so tall, but he DOES have blue eyes and had dark brown hair.

That is my other point. I got married when I was your age, and now I am with that college boy who is suddenly 40 with greying hair instead of dark brown. We have both changed so much. I was a big breast girl who has now had reduction-- yeah, you can find bras, but it would be nice to not always need them! Plus, the whole herniated disc in my neck was horrible. So, even great breasts at 21 can be a pain in the neck, pun intended, at 36. No one person is perfect-- which is a relief, because what a pain in the ass would they be to live with!! You took a step toward being the mature, sexy guy that women really like when you not only thought about your own motives but also realized that your issue was pretty shallow. ALso, whoever said you should never tell someone that they need a boob job is correct. Imagine someone told you that you needed a penis enlargement! OUCH! Breasts are part of what make us women and we tend to take any comments fairly personally.

Hope you continue to think it through and turn into that sexy grown up instead of ... well, not a sexy grown up.

Good luck!