Members telecom69 Posted April 16, 2007 Members Report Share Posted April 16, 2007 Even though my gf is a lot different and more open than she used to be...she told me she just can't feel like she is really into sex like I am, or her being more assertive, or to be more vocal during sex because it makes her feel like a slut. She says she likes sex, but this slut thing really holds her back. She again goes back to telling me it must be from the way she was raised. Beside professional help, who does one grow out of that? Telecom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted April 16, 2007 Report Share Posted April 16, 2007 It sounds as if she was raised to believe only "sluts" enjoy sex. A lifetime of beliefs is hard to overcome. I would suggest that you try and steer her onto this site. Seeing that everyday, normal people enjoying sex and other things may be helpful. Also reading that she may be sharing in some concerns also may help. People like knowing that they may share similar issues. Makes them feel a bit better about themselves.Having her know that there are parents, professionals, men and women on here that just love to have and talk about sex in a mature, educational capacity may be very helpful to her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members m24 Posted April 17, 2007 Members Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 My wife was the same way when we first met. She was not vocal, or in to anything other than what she was thought as natural. After I was able to show her that there was a lot more pleasures in sex than what she realized, she stared coming around. We've been together for nearly five years, and their are still some things I would like her to open up to. But as time goes by she does!!!!My questions to you how long have you both been having sex with one another. sometimes you just have to give someone a little time to get comfortable with you. Was she raised under a strong religious influence. I can give you biblical evidence that sex is not sinful like she was raised to believe. If you would like details let me know.Howard is very correct, sexual comminication is very helpful, and very important in strengthing sexual relationships.Good luck!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shytigress09 Posted April 28, 2007 Members Report Share Posted April 28, 2007 I'm like that a lot of the time and I came from a really religious family. I'm getting out of the slut idea, but with somethings I just can't seem to do because I think it's too slutty. My bf helped (and is helping a lot) by telling me that it's okay to do things, that it's not being slutty if I'm not out there actually sleeping around and being easy and other stuff like that. Reading and asking questions on this forum and the sex ed articles also helped me a lot. But like I said there still are some things that I'm uneasy about like giving him a lap dance or roleplaying or climbing up on top (but this stuff also ties into my body image issues but that's another topic all together). It'll just take some time. Right now I'm slowly trying to be more assertive (suggesting positions and places other than the bedroom to have sex after reading Mikayla's Outside article lol) and working giving a blow job. Maybe splitting things up almost like lessons would help her?Be patient, but know that she might not be able to overcome everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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