Members krisleightate Posted September 24, 2007 Members Report Share Posted September 24, 2007 Eleven Husbands ...A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin"."What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times.?""Well, husband#1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be."Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was suppose to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me."Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up." Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, .he didn't know when he would be able to deliver."Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method."Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not."Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it."Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it."Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it." Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector ; all he ever did was........... God I miss him." But now that I've married you, I'm so excited"."Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?"You're with the "GOVERNMENT"..This time I KNOW I'M gonna getSCREWED."***This had NOOOO Bearing what so ever on my application for Government Employment!And ... most recently, I believe I had this Nurse when I was in the Hospital:A highway patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix.The doctors operated and advised him that all was well.However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs in his crotch.Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctors hadn't told him about, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown up enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his pubic hair were three wide strips of adhesive tape,the kind that takes everything with it when you pull it off.Written in large black letters across the tape was the sentence:"Get well quick..... from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."can you say B.I.T.C.H.? LOL no sense of humor! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted September 24, 2007 Report Share Posted September 24, 2007 OMG!! Too funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members pappyld04 Posted October 13, 2007 Members Report Share Posted October 13, 2007 I am sending this to twisted woman who raised us. She'll love it!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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