Members tabykat170 Posted November 27, 2007 Members Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 So...me and my boyfriend of about two years just moved in together. It's great! I've never been able to have as much sex WHENEVER I want. Yes...it's grand. The only thing is that I'm a little shy in the bedroom. I like to think I'm pretty versatile, and I'll try anything once...Except new positions.I like being able to look into my man's eyes and kissing him. It's great. Plus I love his facial expressions! I've looked and looked for other positions that don't just sound rediculous and uncomfortable. I'm pretty flexible, but some of the positions I found just don't seem intimate at all to me. Does anyone have any ideas and ways I can get these into the bedroom?! That's another thing I have a problem with: initiating a position change. It's always just so awkward and silly feeling.Any tips?!Edit: And yes...before anyone asks...I am new to the sex thing in general. I lost my virginity to this guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted November 27, 2007 Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 Welcome to the site!First, never think that soap operas or porns are how people really switch sexual positions. It's not all graceful, romantic, & well coordinated. Bumping heads, untangling limbs, bodily noises, and sometimes laughing at the repositioning is common (or at least it should be)! If you're worried about asking, just huskily ask your BF to let you turn over, or just turn over and I'm sure he'll get the idea. Sex is adult play, and is suppose to be fun. If you're having sex with that person, you should be a bit more comfortable to be able to let him know what you want.If you want to see his face, well, might I suggest investing in some full length mirrors! Maybe one for the back of the bed, one on either side, and maybe even one for the ceiling! How fun is it to see all angles of you having sex with your man/woman?? OMG it's HOT!!! I dated this one guy that was sooooo fine to look at with clothes on, and totally amazing with his clothes OFF!! It was great to watch his rippling muscles flex with mine. OMG, is it getting hot in here........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tabykat170 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 Oh wow!!! Mirrors sound amazing!!! I have this weird fetish with backs anyway and seeing my man's back muscles flexing...yeah...that sounds great.Another issue is the fact that he is so stinking shy! Every time we've had sex, I've had to initiate it. That really is not a problem but every once in a while I wouldn't mind having him throw me up against a wall and just going at it! But how do I tell him that without making him sound kinda sissy for not wanting to start stuff? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted November 27, 2007 Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 Why not suggest to him that you would just LOVE for him to show the aggressive side of him once in a while. Tender is very nice, but there are ways of letting him know what you want without making him feel wussy.Tell him one of your fantasies, like being tied up, blindfolded, and under his control, or having him just take you from behind while you're showering or getting dressed. Sharing fantasies is suppose to be between people that care and trust (for) each other. Instead of saying "Gee, hon, I love how tender you are with me, BUT, I'd really like....." (It's the BUT that gets the critical tone to it.) How about "Hey, I would just LOVE for you to just ravish me one night, take me from behind/in the shower, and have your way with me!" I don't know too many men that would take offense to THAT!!Wear some "naughtier than nice" lingerie, like leather, vinyl, black lace, something with some chains, or something that looks more "tough" than frilly, if you get my meaning. Men take that kind of cue really well too!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tabykat170 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 Thanks yall! I really appriciate all the help! Hopefully I can get him to come out his shell a little more. He's just as new to this as me and I think he had some bad experiences with a previous lover. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members pappyld04 Posted November 27, 2007 Members Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 One thing should be said about the ravishing part here. Some of us guys were raised to treat girl differently. Ravishing is a step beyond our upbringing and a step short of the jailhouse. Maybe he just needs to know that you are okay with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tabykat170 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted November 27, 2007 Oh trust me...I've told him quite a few times that even though I'm really small, he ain't gonna hurt me!! The only time I think I've ever seen him just get completely relaxed with it and not seem so...uptight...was when I got him completely shitfaced. It was great! I didn't have to start anything. He just took over and didn't stop...well...till he passed out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mikayla1 Posted November 28, 2007 Members Report Share Posted November 28, 2007 I think that in a way you are caught up in the 'romantic' ideal of sex. Yes, positions where you kiss and see each other are wonderful - sometimes! When you are having sex with a partner whom you care for, you ARE intimate - period! You can be doing it doggy style and not even be able to see his face due to YOUR face being forced into a pillow - but if your body is reacting to his touch - it is intimate! There are other ways to show him how much you feel for him - reach back and fondle him, rub your hands on his body, back, legs. Kiss a lot before and after sex. Talk to him during sex to tell him or ask him how he likes what you are doing. Use oral sex as your intimate time - look up at him as you suck his cock. All these things are ways to be intimate without being grounded to a position or two.Also, Tyger is right, sex is not a coordinated event most times! We have to be open to laughter and error during sex. IF you want to change positions - change positions! Just do it, it doesn't have to be some kind of techical event. I think that if you are both shy - things will get more comfortable in time! Just have FUN! SOme men are just not 'take the bull by the horns' guys. My hubby NEVER used to initiate - which was fine, cause I have no problem doing it. However, sometimes a girl just wants to be 'taken' and so I told him. He told me, similiar to what Pappy is saying, that he was not 'raised' to be like that. He saw the demand for sex - or the initiation of it - as being somewhat indecent to me. Huh? What? After a long conversation about expectations and thoughts about it - we started splitting the initiation - now that man throws me on the bed and begins to suck me all over before I can say 'boooo!' Just talk about it, it will come! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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