Parents Split On Toys

[brandyfan411]

Ok, this is getting to me now that I've gotten my own toy.

My father is a toy FANATIC, I mean he uses toys more than he breathes. Him and my mom don't do it anymore and I think it has to do partly with the toys he uses.

My mother thinks toys are disgusting. She would probably disown me if she found out I had a vibe. She thinks that what he's doing is absolutely sickening. She used to masturbate but has never has a orgasm (she calls them cookies which totally ruins real cookie eating). I think she would have one if she used a toy but she doesn't like them.

I want to discuss the thought of using toys myself with my parents but the last time it was brought up (it was brought up by my brother and his constant masturbation) my parents were about to kill eachother. This makes me sick because I usually talk to them about everything.

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

[Mikayla1]

NOT tell them! I applaud your parents for having an open relationship with you - but personally, I believe what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom. If you have questions or concerns, I do not want to disuade you from talking to your parents if you feel comfortable doing so, but if you know it is going to cause chaos then I say let it go.

It sounds like your mother has a pretty hefty mental block - and this will likely never change. I do not think knowing that her daughter has a vibe is going to help. However, you never know what motivates people, so perhaps you want to discuss? I am just not sure about it.

Oh, and I have to ask, what toy does your father use that is so controversial????

Welcome, welcome!

[brandyfan411]

Ok, I agree. I think that not discussing this issue is good. I mean, my mother is old school. She said her first crush was Starchy and Hutch. Every time we would move (we've settled down now that we're older and I'm getting ready to go to college), she would throw my dad's toys out. My dad would think that the moving people would take them. But she has a real problem with them seriously.

Oh and my father uses all kinds of toys and vids. His favorite is a anus opening that has like this tube on the other end. I guess it's supposed to replicate the feeling of a rectum. He has a vagina like this too. He loves interracial erotica too. I think he has a swizzle stick but I'm not sure.

I think she's mad that she has a vagina but he doesn't wanna use it. I guess I can understand her frasturation. But she said my dad demanding so I guess she's better off.

[Tyger]

Hey now!! Let's not pick on the Starsky & Hutch, k?

Anyway, I don't think telling your mom about your vibe is a good idea. It definitely sounds like she has an issue with toys, which could be that her hubby may come across as wanting to play with the toys rather than her, and if that's the case (especially after she use to like to use toys), she will not have a positive spin on toy usage. There won't be any way to change that. Neither of their sexual practices are really none of your business, and I find it disturbing that they've allowed you so much info on their sex life, or lack thereof. But that's MY opinion.

I have to agree, there are a few things that should probably stay private from your parents, like stuff that you do in the bedroom. It also may "hurt" your mother's feelings somehow, but, I know, as a mother, she probably won't disown you cuz of you getting a toy (because she loves you. If she does, no offense, but the woman has some SERIOUS issues), but it would probably bother her.

Let me also extend a welcome and I hope you have fun here!

[Kinky Twinkie]

We'll looks like the christmas shopping list can be narrowed down on where to go and what to look for. I guess I have to agree to not tell your mom about the vib to make sure it dosn't find it way to the trash. Some people have hang ups. My wife did some at first but now ( well lets just say I saw her buying a bullet at the locall adam & eve store for a stocking stuffer and it wasn't for her sister who swears by the bullet every time she comes and borrows my kinky toys) she more open to trying them. If only we can find a lube that dosnt give her a burning sensation.

I think it cool you know so much about your dads toys, I have tried those toys ( the sleeves that look like a puss(fleshlight) and the jelly type sleeves that simulate an anus not to mention a couple other types and they not bad. Good one to get your brother next to lube.

I not sure how my wife would like those at this time but maybe next time we go browse the adam & eve shop down the road I mention I used to have this and see what she says. I think most of those toys can be had on here cheaper then at the local store, but I like to go browse them before shopping around online.

Many times I find items here cheaper and many times I find other items cheaper there then here when you add in shipping and handling. The shop is good to visit because you can see what it looks like and sometimes feel it at the store. If it looks worthy of consideration, looks up reviews and see if it something worthy to still consider.

Glenn

[brandyfan411]

Well Tyger, I wouldn't say that's alot of info. I mean, my mother was the one who taught me my sex ed and we have a very open relationship so we talk. She's like my best friend, and best friends share alot of things including sexual issues. I'd rather have her teach me than some nutjob to tell me incorrectly.

Honestly, I think people that aren't open with their kids are the ones who get in trouble. I wanna know as much as I can so I know what to do. It's just like with the whole orgasm thing, I had no one to tell me how to achieve it until I came here. Learning it on my own from some idiot didn't help. But with the right help, I got there. That's all my parents are doing.

And to Glenn: I have no problem with knowing and I also think it's cool. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it. He's the one who really sparked my interest in toys in the first place.

I usually get my brother magazines. I found his PSP and it was loaded with naked women. So as of right now, I get him women magazines.

[Kinky Twinkie]

Well Tyger, I wouldn't say that's alot of info. I mean, my mother was the one who taught me my sex ed and we have a very open relationship so we talk. She's like my best friend, and best friends share alot of things including sexual issues. I'd rather have her teach me than some nutjob to tell me incorrectly.

Honestly, I think people that aren't open with their kids are the ones who get in trouble. I wanna know as much as I can so I know what to do. It's just like with the whole orgasm thing, I had no one to tell me how to achieve it until I came here. Learning it on my own from some idiot didn't help. But with the right help, I got there. That's all my parents are doing.

And to Glenn: I have no problem with knowing and I also think it's cool. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it. He's the one who really sparked my interest in toys in the first place.

I usually get my brother magazines. I found his PSP and it was loaded with naked women. So as of right now, I get him women magazines.

What is PSP? I not heard of that magazine I dont think.

Glenn

[brandyfan411]

To Glenn: I meant the game system PSP. He bought himself the game system (the handheld thing) and it has internet on it. He downloaded a bunch of women and saved all of the photos.

To ThorsNymph: When it comes to sex ed, I am very healthy. I know all of the in and outs, even the ones that I didn't wanna know lol (I've seen some pics that made me wanna puke). I wish that everyone could learn everything there is to know, not just how to do it.

My parents could use some counseling. It doesn't seem like they get along. I mean my dad is very annoying, I must admit. I don't know if my mom is thinking "just stay with him until the kids are gone", she very well could be. I don't think I'd stop her if she did divorce him. But yes I would tell them to go see someone, at least my mother because something is going on.

My father would have a good time with mom if he wasn't so wrapped up in his self,lol. My mother has a great bod (I want her butt,lol) but my dad loves his toys too much to look her way. It sucks for my mom because she's not getting any but won't go and get herself something to make that better.

But I am very tight with them both, especially my mom. It's been rocky (I was the one who wasn't very good and got spankings while I was a young teen) but I've straightened out ,lol, and so has our relationship. The talks we all have though (I have a younger brother 15 and a younger sister 14) have ALWAYS been open, and very detailed. My brother passed out from the STD talk we had (there were some bad pics in that discussion PHEW!!).

EDIT: BTW, I've been wanting to try a bullet. Honeydo (Chris) has told me a name of a nice bullet. That will be my next toy. I'd have it by now but I'm going Christmas shopping this week and I need my money. (I wish my parents would give me a sex toy!!)

[Kinky Twinkie]

To Glenn: I meant the game system PSP. He bought himself the game system (the handheld thing) and it has internet on it. He downloaded a bunch of women and saved all of the photos.

EDIT: BTW, I've been wanting to try a bullet. Honeydo (Chris) has told me a name of a nice bullet. That will be my next toy. I'd have it by now but I'm going Christmas shopping this week and I need my money. (I wish my parents would give me a sex toy!!)

Wooaa you can do that on a game machine????? My God I better start investigating these toys before my son discovers them.

Santa bringing me a bullet, I need to learn how to use it. anyone run across some material on how to best use these things. I noticed it when my friend at the shop it was bought refused to let me buy one ( after she rang up my wifes order), then went to stuff her stuffing with stuff I bought . LOL it gonna be a great christmas morning!

In fact ya'll planning to do what I doing christmas morning with the toys santa bringing?

Glenn

[brandyfan411]

To Glenn: Oh yeah!! They have a few systems that have internet capability. My brother has his imfamous PSP, he has a Nintendo Wii which also internet (I've caught him a few times. Yes, we don't like eachother lol), and I think his Nintendo DS has wifi but it's not like the other two.

And maybe Mikayla has a article on using bullets, she has it on everything else. I wish I could get my stocking stuffed with a bullet. I don't plan on masturbating on Christmas but I'd still like one for the day after,lol!!

To ThorsNymph: I have definently realized that any relationships I have should NOT be like my parent's. If I ever see that happening, I'll cut it short. I really don't wanna be in a relationship with someone who doesn't wanna be with me, that would totally suck!! I have read a few books a while back. I would want my future partner to want to use toys but use me more,lol. The books you suggested sound pretty good. And I have WAY too many book stores around me. There's four Barnes and Nobles and two Books-A-Million. I will have to check those books out ( especially that Since $!!). Thank you for the book look ups!!

To Howard: You know what Howard? I never really thought of that. I know she knows about masturbation but I don't think she really KNOWS how it works. I guess I could give that a try. Howard, you are so clever!! I don't know what I'd do without you and your great mind Howard.

[pappyld04]

I think a Joy of Sex or even possibly a masturbation guide is in order for your mother. I believe they have both male and female versions. Maybe even a certificate for her to use if she starts to change her mind. Maybe a Visa gift card or the like in case she doesn't.

[brandyfan411]

I think a Joy of Sex or even possibly a masturbation guide is in order for your mother. I believe they have both male and female versions. Maybe even a certificate for her to use if she starts to change her mind. Maybe a Visa gift card or the like in case she doesn't.

They sell this in the store?! If so.....I want a copy because I can always use a masturbation guide. Where is "Joy of Sex" located?

[pappyld04]

They sell this in the store?! If so.....I want a copy because I can always use a masturbation guide. Where is "Joy of Sex" located?

I just looked and didn't see it in the area I checked in but that doesn't mean it isn't available here so I think it may be best to ask you to contact Mikayla, Tyger, Howard or maybe even Rob or Meg to see if it is available here. If they cannot help you then PM me and I'll see about some links for you! BTW there are many books available here that you may also enjoy!!! They are in the shopping tab at the upper left of this page then scroll thrugh to the book area!!!

[Tyger]

Barnes & Noble has an "Adult Health" section (or something of the like), and there will be numerous books such as that, and yes, it's a GREAT read!! Other book stores have that kind of section as well. Usually under ADULT something.

And, I'm glad that you and your mother have such a great relationship. What I meant by my comment was that there are 2 roles in a marriage with kids: parents/spouses. Until the kids are old enough to truly understand (which you are now, but it seems as though you've known a heck of a lot more about their sexual relationship a lot longer than just a year or so), sex ed, IMO, should be generalized. Honest, yet generalized.

Again, this is only MY opinion. Everyone differs. We each make our own decisions as to how we will raise our kids. And, of course, my philosophy isn't the only one out there.

It's really sad for your mother to have stayed in an unhappy marriage for so long, but, at least you've learned what kind of relationship you DON'T want to have with a man. And you can make your relationships different, and put forth more of a conscious effort to make it so.

And, if you're as close to your mom as you say you are (which I have no doubt), again, I doubt that she would disown you for having an adult toy. If she finds it accidently, or you do actually want to tell her that you have one, you can always be honest with her and tell her you didn't want to hurt her feelings by bringing up owning a toy since she has issues with them, but to kindly point out that her issues are just that, HERS, not yours. And, everyone's entitled to have their own opinions and try new things. And maybe then you can ask her why exactly she honestly hates the thought of toys. That would also be a great learning experience as well, maybe for the both of you.

Best wishes!

[brandyfan411]

To pappyld04: I will ask Howard about it. I'm sure he'll know something about it since he pretty much knows everything,lol. Thanks for the heads up.

To Tyger: Thank you for your suggestions on the books and where to look. I will have to see what I can find .

In my family, things are open when it comes to the older ones which is me, my mother, and my father. I have no problems talking about this subject so it doesn't really phase me when my mom and I talk. And she couldn't tell any anything from a year or so because there's nothing to tell, ROFL!!

And I definently disagree with the whole Sex ed thing!! That's the problem with kids now. Nobody teaches them what they need to know, or they don't tell them enough, and they wind up 10 years old and pregnant!! I wish there were more people out there like my mother who would sit down with their kids down and REALLY talk to them. I think it's utterly rediculous that parents are afraid to not talk to their kids. They need to know the ins and outs of this, especially today.

I don't plan on telling her. I have it hidden but if she ever does find it (some how, she can find stuff we bring in this house that really isn't supposed to be there), I'll tell her. I'm not gonna lie because that's stupid.

[brandyfan411]

See!! See, I told you he would know!! He's like....I don't even know the name for it!!

I'm gonna make up a name for Howard:

Dictoenclothesaurus!!

There we go; Howard, you are a Dictoenclothesaurus.

[pappyld04]

Adam and Eve should also have it and I would suggest Googling the title. You may be able to find a very cheap price on the book since the author just died and they have a new edition on the market. I checked a while ago and there were plenty of links to it. Just make sure you check since some were in French and I saw one in Braille! Unless you're a serious multi-tasker that one may be a bit boring!!! LOL!!! BTW, you mentioned your brothers mags take a look through them. They will most likely have ads inside!!!

[Tyger]

It IS a great book. I've found many hard-to-find items on Amazon.com, great prices, new AND used. I usually go for used if they're in Like New condition. Although, I did get mine from a book club, and paid like 17 cents for it (with membership).

Alex Comfort DID write it, and has put out a fully revised copy for the 21st century even!! Unfortunately, as of now, TT doesn't carry this book. We DO carry a DVD called 10 Secrets To Great Sex however.

There's also a book called "Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex" by Sari Locker. Those "For Idiot" books are great, IMO, cuz they break stuff down SOOOO simply, that anyone can follow it (which can be amazingly helpful no matter what your intelligence level if you're simply baffled on HOW TO.)

[brandyfan411]

Do you think that I could get them at like a used book store? Surprisingly, we have only one adult store but have a few used book stores .

[brandyfan411]

Good!! I'll get a hold of them and see what they have. Hopefully they have it there, that would be a blessing. I'll also look into the books that you guys suggested at Barnes and Noble. I'm sure if they don't have it at one, they'll have it at the other three.

[Tyger]

Used book stores are also great, but they don't have a normal "running inventory". It's whatever people bring in, or they find at swaps, to sell. But, it definitely doesn't hurt to try!! Also, Barnes & Noble does place orders, so if you don't feel like running around, the store should be happy to get it in for you!