How To Handle Running Into Exes

[Tyger]

How to Handle Running into an Ex

By Jessica Knoll

Whether the breakup was amicable or a big ole heart-wrenching mess, crossing paths with a has-been boyfriend is never easy. Here's how to get through it, perhaps even gracefully.

Recently, former pop power couple Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake reunited during rehearsals for Madonna's concert in Madison Square Garden. The exchange between the old flames was said to be short and sweet. According to Debbie Magids, Ph.D., these two got it right. "When you run into an ex, the goal is to be as gracious but brief as possible," she says. Since not all ex-encounters are created equal, Cosmo identifies a few scenarios to prep you for your own potentially awkward moment.

When You're the Dumpee

If you bump into the guy who emotionally gutted you, put on a brave face. This means no yelling, blaming, or crying — these antics are best saved for your friends. And you don't want to confirm how smart he was to ditch you. No matter how poorly you're holding up, when he asks how you've been, smile and say, "Great!" Then move on.

When You're the Dumper

Guys behave differently than girls do when they've been hurt. Whereas it might be within your emotional capacity to "act" warmly toward the jerk who ran your heart through the shredder, when you're the jerk, don't expect the same treatment. Be prepared for his cold shoulder and don't dwell on it. Similarly, restrain yourself from being overly nice or concerned. This is only a means to alleviate your own guilt, and might even lead him on.

When You're Still Tempted

You kinda secretly hoped you'd run into him this way: out with your friends, looking and feeling gorgeous. You've had a few drinks and suddenly … you're missing him. Stop, take a deep breath, and mentally list all the reasons why the two of you were not meant to be. Then, remind yourself how long it took to get to this good place you're in now. Don't waste that kind of confidence and energy on him — instead, channel it toward the newer, hotter guy across the room.

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[sun_flower969]

How ironic! I ran into my ex recently as well! I did not follow any protocol whatsoever! He was nice and gave me a hug and a kiss. Introduced me to his wife etc. Now we are in contact and it is very cool! A little on the tempting side but I think it is one sided at this point!

[mystofpric]

Wow, usually i run and hide from my ex! I guess I don't follow orders very well.....

[synirr]

Hell, I'm happy to run into most of my exes, we are still friends!

[Guest eminatic]

if i ran into my ex i'd either knock his lights out or turn him in to the police. or both.

[ManofHerdreams]

I doubt that there is anyone here that hasn't been hurt by a member of the opposite sex at some point in their life but life goes on and we can't judge all by the wrong doings of one or even more bad apples from the barrel.

Put the bad times behind you and move on.

Man

[mystofpric]

I was talking with my now former step- mom and she told me that when she had to see my dad at court last monday she wore her best ass jeans, a cute sweater did here hair and make up to make him see what he let go. Then she didn't say a word to him and did her crossword puzzle filling it in with words like "ASSHOLE" "LIAR" "CHEAT" etc etc

[ladylove]

I don't run into ex's. My Hubby whisked me off to several parts unknown. There are time I'd love to know what ever happened to ------ or I wonder what ---- looks like now? That kind of stuff.

[Tyger]

When I was back in Maine, I ran into a couple of exes, but it was no biggie. I'm still friends with my old FWB, and have been since I was 14, so we have always been on good terms. I DID get back in touch with my ex hubby's sister and mother! LOL That went very well.

In East TX, I haven't run into anyone from my past, and don't expect too. Maybe if we ever moved back to the Austin area, but there were only 3 there, & it's a BIG city! LOL But I'd still be nice.