A Real Problem
I got a letter today from the state that Liz's dad lives in.
It said I could call the toll free number and find out how much child support the state had collected on my behalf.
It looks as though he knew he was screwed either way, and signed the paper saying he was dad.
Now I have to worry about a whoile new set of problems.
His mom for one.
She has custody of his other 3 kids, and I am afraid she will try to take Liz away from me, because she is her grand daughter.
She lives in a state with granparent rights.
I also have to worry about his girlfriend who is a major bitch.
I'm sorry, but any woman who writes me KNOWING I was 4 months pregnant saying "I been screwing your man and I just had a miscarrige with his baby, etc." is a total bitch.
She may try and talk him into taking Liz away as well.
It isn't fair damnit!
Why should I have to live my life in constant fear of losing my baby girl?
Why am I still hurting so damn bad from him dumping me?
I can easily answer that one, I was in love with him.
Completely, totally in love.
I let him in my defenses, he said the right things at the right times, and I just fell, long and hard.
Hell, I even went out and bought a mens diamond band to propose to him at Christmas.
Oh well, life goes on.
Yeah I still deal with the hurt and anger from when I found out he was screwing another woman when he was supposed to be with me.
Mostly its the hurt.
I am reminded daily of how much I loved him when I see Liz.
Oh well, Live and let live I suppose.
I know I have pretty much given up any hopes of ever having a relationship ever again.
I mean, lets face it, I'm 36, I have 4 kids, and I go to school.
No man in his right or left mind is gonna want to be with me, he'll take one look at my girls and run for the hills thinking I want a daddy for them.
I hate being lonely, it sucks big time.
Geuss I am just too tired to do this shit right now.
I'm going to bed, G'night
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